But I like just being left alone and am perfectly happy to go several days to a week without any human contact whatsoever. The North East of England where I live isn't exactly a center of culture (ie it's an industry-smothered pile of shit with a very large working class population). I work from home for the family business so there isn't much need to go out except for the odd social occasion that a friend organises or meet someone for a meal or you feel horny and require pussy.
I guess my point is the harder you look for something like this, the more it eludes you. I don't look for it (or want it) at all yet it happens. It's getting your foot in the door that's the hard work, the rest should flow easily. Desperation need not apply, Parce was joking but he's pretty true, people can sense desperation.
WELP
quote:
Mortious had this to say about Duck Tales:
Desperation need not apply, Parce was joking but he's pretty true, people can sense desperation.
This is seriously the only good advice in the thread aside from repeatedly being told to get a job
You're desperate and normal people don't like desperate people
quote:
Mortious had this to say about the Spice Girls:
I'm pretty much the opposite. Good looking, quick witted, modest (oho see what I did there), and I make friends extremely easily.But I like just being left alone and am perfectly happy to go several days to a week without any human contact whatsoever. The North East of England where I live isn't exactly a center of culture (ie it's an industry-smothered pile of shit with a very large working class population). I work from home for the family business so there isn't much need to go out except for the odd social occasion that a friend organises or meet someone for a meal or you feel horny and require pussy.
I guess my point is the harder you look for something like this, the more it eludes you. I don't look for it (or want it) at all yet it happens. It's getting your foot in the door that's the hard work, the rest should flow easily. Desperation need not apply, Parce was joking but he's pretty true, people can sense desperation.
I find it ironic that you have vastly more success than I do with such similar social preferences.
The tendency of people to sense extreme need or desperation is part of why I haven't tried very hard to meet new people. I have a very real, very potent need for companionship and I know that need itself will prevent fulfillment. Maybe it's wrongheaded but I think of it being somewhat different than desperation even though the end result is the same; desperation, to my way of thinking, correlates to what you want rather than what you need. One way or another, the only real solution to the problem is making friends and I'm becoming more and more motivated to pursue photography as a means of generating these friends.
It is by caffeine alone I set my mind in motion. It is by the beans of Java the thoughts aquire speed, the teeth acquire stains, the stains become a warning. It is by caffeine alone I set my mind in motion.
quote:
While possessed by the spirit of Somthor, Damnati wrote:
I think I'm far better off socially by finding people with whom I share a common ground to begin with rather than using some trial-and-error cold approach where I have no assets whatever to recommend me. I'm not bottom of the barrel as far as looks go but, given my lack of a suave manner or an exceptionally quick wit, dead average looks leaves me nothing to bank on with that kind of cold approach. Anyway, The Game is aimed at picking up the opposite (or same, if applicable) sex, not at generally making more friends and getting on with them better.As for the beach, I'm not sure what to think of what Addy has to say. Being as I'm overweight enough to have visible stretch marks, I'm extremely self-concious about letting anyone see me without a shirt; this complicates normal beach activities such as surfing, bodyboarding, swimming, etc. I mentioned that I generally as though I've wasted my time and gas if I've driven all the way to the beach by myself and done nothing but read or walk around; it's just dull and I can do that nearer home while still getting out among people. I've also said in a couple of different places that just approaching people randomly to try and strike up a conversation isn't my thing. Honestly, the beach just isn't a place I enjoy much, I fail to see how this specific bit suggests serious social issues.
A lot of people feel energized by being around large crowds of people and, unconnected to this, they feel upbeat and happy in sunny weather. I'm the polar opposite: crowds makes me nervous and wear me out while the sun is oppressive and puts a severe damper on my mood. San Diego is a really poor place for me to pursue outdoor activity of any kind as it's storms and rain and generally gloomy weather that lifts my spirits. There is very little I love as much as a walk in the rain and opportunities for that just don't come very often here. At some point, when I have the necessary independence (hopefully within the next year or two), I'll move the fuck out of this sun-cursed hellhole and find some place with better weather to live in.
Edit: I did the getting laid for the sake of getting laid thing once and found that that was more than enough for me. Was not satisfying at all and my moral compass reasserted itself at some point enough that I'd rather save that for a long-term relationship.
You're a complete moron who can't see the connection between self confidence and making friends, nor the connection between having sex and self confidence.
Hope this helps.
Step 1: go tO the Gym noob
quote:
Everyone wondered WTF when MC Jensizzle wrote:
You're a complete moron who can't see the connection between self confidence and making friends, nor the connection between having sex and self confidence.Hope this helps.
You are absolutely right. I have no idea why some people feel more confident because they dipped their wick. The experiences I have had leave me with no doubts about my prowess; aside from further affirmation of ability, I really gain nothing from sex for the sake of sex. Actually, I've found it undermines any sense of confidence I have because there's no connection beyond penetration in such situations.
It is by caffeine alone I set my mind in motion. It is by the beans of Java the thoughts aquire speed, the teeth acquire stains, the stains become a warning. It is by caffeine alone I set my mind in motion.
quote:
While possessed by the spirit of Somthor, Damnati wrote:
You are absolutely right. I have no idea
this is the only part of your post that is not completely out of touch with reality
you are borderline insane
"Don't want to sound like a fanboy, but I am with you. I'll buy it for sure, it's just a matter of for how long I will be playing it..."
- Silvast, Battle.net forums
quote:
While possessed by the spirit of Somthor, Zair wrote:
Severe isolation will do that probably
hey bro why don't you justify his delusions some more i bet that'll help
tomorrow you're gonna go down and get a gym membership and a puppy or you will be like this forever
up up and away
It is by caffeine alone I set my mind in motion. It is by the beans of Java the thoughts aquire speed, the teeth acquire stains, the stains become a warning. It is by caffeine alone I set my mind in motion.
quote:
While possessed by the spirit of Somthor, Damnati wrote:
Somehow I doubt I'm the only person in the world who finds that one off sex offers no fulfillment.
quote:
MC Jensizzle wrote this then went back to looking for porn:
hey bro why don't you justify his delusions some more i bet that'll help
odds he will follow the advise in the thread are slim anyhow. Every post is an excuse why he can't or won't do something.
the gym is probably the best advice really, especially for a self esteem problem. If you are patient and realistic.
Plus, even if you are poor, you should be able to find a gym somewhere that costs less per month than whatever mmo you are currently subscribed to
holy fuck what is wrong with you people how was this not the first and only reply
quote:
Sakkra enlisted the help of an infinite number of monkeys to write:
Church is a good place to socialize, so long as you tone down the rabid fundamentalist bullshit that you were spouting when you first came here.
I'm pretty sure he's like a hardcore atheist now.
quote:
Gadani had this to say about Tron:
I'm pretty sure he's like a hardcore atheist now.
Unitarian Universalism church then
You'll end up with a job, some friends, and you'll lose weight.
quote:
Zair painfully thought these words up:
odds he will follow the advise in the thread are slim anyhow. Every post is an excuse why he can't or won't do something.the gym is probably the best advice really, especially for a self esteem problem. If you are patient and realistic.
Plus, even if you are poor, you should be able to find a gym somewhere that costs less per month than whatever mmo you are currently subscribed to
Pretty much.
That and the fact that people who are interested in changing their lives typically just do it.
Nina fucked around with this message on 11-19-2008 at 02:23 AM.
quote:
Zair enlisted the help of an infinite number of monkeys to write:
odds he will follow the advise in the thread are slim anyhow. Every post is an excuse why he can't or won't do something.the gym is probably the best advice really, especially for a self esteem problem. If you are patient and realistic.
Plus, even if you are poor, you should be able to find a gym somewhere that costs less per month than whatever mmo you are currently subscribed to
He's probably known what he needs to do this entire time (to become more social or more confident or whatever) but is just looking for either someone to give him a boot to the ass (which really isn't possible on the internet) or to try and justify the shitty arguments he's given himself as to why he can't or isn't interested in doing things.
damnati, most of this bullshit is all in your head. just go out and do something and stop overthinking shit.
quote:
Willias had this to say about the Spice Girls:
He's probably known what he needs to do this entire time (to become more social or more confident or whatever) but is just looking for either someone to give him a boot to the ass (which really isn't possible on the internet) or to try and justify the shitty arguments he's given himself as to why he can't or isn't interested in doing things.damnati, most of this bullshit is all in your head. just go out and do something and stop overthinking shit.
Does it occur to you that perhaps you don't know shit about the area I live in and how that complicates taking the advice given in this thread? I don't dissemble, if I want a boot to the ass, I'll ask for a boot to the ass. What I asked for is some information to help get me started while I don't have any money so I can actually get somewhere when I do. Kinanik and Brahmin both provided some useful tidbits so I suppose the mission was accomplished; anything thereafter is just fluff, apparently. Damnati fucked around with this message on 11-19-2008 at 10:19 AM.
It is by caffeine alone I set my mind in motion. It is by the beans of Java the thoughts aquire speed, the teeth acquire stains, the stains become a warning. It is by caffeine alone I set my mind in motion.
And I don't care where you live, if you're in the US, then there's something to go and do somewhere around you, you just need to take the time and find it.
I mean, shit, do volunteer work. Should be plenty coming up since Thanksgiving and Christmas are nearing.
but then again, aren't you the faggot that posted shit about hating celebrating christmas or some crap?
i freaking love it there. go for a walk on the beach, leave your shirt on, don't try and socialize, just walk. La Jolla is beautiful. the beach is fantastic there. just go walk on it. it will help with your weight issue you mentioned and get you out of the house.
if you want to socialize on the internet, then by all means do so, but take a half-hour/hour walk on the beach each day first. you'll relax, you'll lose weight, you'll get healthier, and all that in turn will more than likely boost your self confidence etc and so on, you see where that all goes i would hope.
seriously, beach walk, 30 minutes a day, shirt on don't try and meet people.
yes, you said you'd have to drive there, so do it, gas is cheaper right now.
or, just keep staying at home and complain about how hard your life is to us. Trent fucked around with this message on 11-19-2008 at 12:16 PM.
Steven Steve fucked around with this message on 11-19-2008 at 01:04 PM.
"Don't want to sound like a fanboy, but I am with you. I'll buy it for sure, it's just a matter of for how long I will be playing it..."
- Silvast, Battle.net forums
quote:
Mr. Parcelan's fortune cookie read:
Wrong, wrong, WRONG.A) Damnati doesn't have the moral conviction, the good looks or the bold attitude to be a Pick-Up Artist.
B) PUAs are possibly the lowest form of life next to people who believe the Ladder Theory.
C) Fuck you.
A) It could still make him better than he is so far
B) So is Damnati
C) deal
"Don't want to sound like a fanboy, but I am with you. I'll buy it for sure, it's just a matter of for how long I will be playing it..."
- Silvast, Battle.net forums
quote:
Willias Model 2000 was programmed to say:
Did you actually think people would be sympathetic to that crap here?And I don't care where you live, if you're in the US, then there's something to go and do somewhere around you, you just need to take the time and find it.
I mean, shit, do volunteer work. Should be plenty coming up since Thanksgiving and Christmas are nearing.
but then again, aren't you the faggot that posted shit about hating celebrating christmas or some crap?
This is so amazingly stupid I don't have words. I asked here because asking social people in my area results in what I'm telling you: there is precisely shit to do on this side of county; social gathering points for people my age are between 15 and 20 minutes away. Given that I have no income, 300 bucks in the bank, and about that much in credit card debt at the moment, I really can't afford to even drive those 15 to 30 minutes. To call this a social failing boggles the mind.
As for La Jolla and UCSD, they're about 45 minutes away from where I live. I love those areas myself but I haven't got the financial means to go there more than maybe once a month. It'd be pretty goddamned amazing to be able to go there every day but I don't think I'll be able to compass that even with a job due to time constraints. I figure I'll shoot for at least once a week out in La Jolla or Torrey Pines or Mission Beach or <insert nice social/walking/scenic place here> once I can actually afford to do it.
Seriously, if there was some social activity I could reasonably participate in on a regular basis right now, I would be doing it. At this point, I've canceled MMO subscriptions and I'm limiting my driving to going to and from school to save on gas. If my lack of finances equates to making excuses and being a social failure, I suppose you people are quite right and I'm just whining. Quite honestly, I cannot see asking for information on internet footholds for real world activity as a failure. There has to be a starting point and this is the best available to me right now, what the fuck do you suggest I do that I'm not already doing?
It is by caffeine alone I set my mind in motion. It is by the beans of Java the thoughts aquire speed, the teeth acquire stains, the stains become a warning. It is by caffeine alone I set my mind in motion.
Anyone who ever thought: "Dag, I want a girlfriend," just doesn't get one.
Girlfriends happen by accidents. Then years later, you realize what a tragedy they were.
quote:
Mr. Parcelan said this about your mom:
"Guys I want to be social." ----> "GUYS I CANNOT BE SOCIAL NO MATTER WHAT."Anyone who ever thought: "Dag, I want a girlfriend," just doesn't get one.
Girlfriends happen by accidents. Then years later, you realize what a tragedy they were.
Explain in detail how "I don't have money to pursue real world social activities right now so I'd like to at least look for some good options until I can" equates "GUYS I CANNOT BE SOCIAL NO MATTER WHAT." I've said several times in this thread, including in the original post, that finances and where I live limit my real world options. Several different people have posited real world options that I have repeatedly stated are outside my financial abilities. I've also said those options sound like great ideas for when I do have money for them. There is no rational basis for your argument.
It is by caffeine alone I set my mind in motion. It is by the beans of Java the thoughts aquire speed, the teeth acquire stains, the stains become a warning. It is by caffeine alone I set my mind in motion.
quote:
There was much rejoicing when Damnati said this:
Explain in detail how "I don't have money to pursue real world social activities right now so I'd like to at least look for some good options until I can" equates "GUYS I CANNOT BE SOCIAL NO MATTER WHAT." I've said several times in this thread, including in the original post, that finances and where I live limit my real world options. Several different people have posited real world options that I have repeatedly stated are outside my financial abilities. I've also said those options sound like great ideas for when I do have money for them. There is no rational basis for your argument.
Walking in a park is free!
Saying hello to people is free!
OkCupid.com is free!
