sigpic courtesy of This Guy, original modified by me
Bloodsage: Hm...slow news day.
Suddenly, the door flies open as a metal-clad bounty hunter activates her speed booster and goes hurtling through the room, crashing through the door on the opposite end.
VernalTemptress: Is that right?
A red-clad samurai is close on her heels, though he takes the time to close the door behind him as he makes a brief bow and then heads for the other end of the room.
Bajah: Forgiveness, please!
Bloodsage: Looks like another poor foreigner got decapitated in the high school.
The door flies off its hinges as a tremendous, stick-like man charges through, waving his trouts menacingly.
Kagrama: HAEV AET YUO, yuo saelty SEAE PUFFEINS!!111?
Following close by, a young female pirate scurries after him.
Addy: Cap'n, wait! There aren't any puffins here!
VernalTemptress: Tsk. The violence in schools today is appalling.
A hole is punched through the roof as a bearded, suit-clad, cape-wearing superhero and his spunky sidekick are hurled through the roof and crash into the floor, denting the linoleum.
Gydyman: Great Notre Dame Law Review! These titans are proving to be difficult!
BattyBoy: Holy Obvious Parody, Gydyman! Do you think we'll succeed?
Gydyman: So that children may live without fear of being taught by biology by an Egyptian titan, we MUST! GYDYMAN, AWAAAAY!
The two superheroes leap from the floor and take off flying through the hole in the roof.
Bloodsage: Really, there's not enough security around schools today. It's a low priority, and it shouldn't be.
The entire wall comes crashing down as a hawk-headed titan comes barelling into the house. He rubs his head and groans.
Ja'Deth: Rrrgh...he suckerpunched me with some sort of lawyer cliche. I had no idea counselmen could hit so hard.
Karnaj: Clearly, you've never played Law Calibur 2.
Ja'Deth: No. Is it worth buying?
Karnaj: The game, yes, but stay away from the movie. Raul Julia and Jean Claude Van Damme aren't very good representations of Reynold James and Willam Pussyfoot.
Ja'Deth: You know, I always thought we should have a Parcio Kart tournament or something.
Karnaj: Hold that thought, the sidekick is punching me in the groin-OH! RIGHT IN THE RIVER NILE! I'LL GET YOU, YOU LITTLE SHITBAG!
BattyBoy: My testicular pugilism is number one!
The titans rise from the house and begin their fight again, leaving the house essentially in ruins. Bloodsage quietly munches on a sausage.
Bloodsage: Huh...looks like Vallo was violently murdered and won't be appearing in this episode.
Vallo: 
VernalTemptress: But look at the Civics page. For some reason, here's Lady D.
Lady D: 
Vallo:
Bloodsage: Huh...you're right. Say, why's the door all busted up...and why's the wall gone...and why is the dark taint of Set's groin's presence fouling the air?
VernalTemptress: Maybe we'll never know.
I know, you were hoping Bloodsage would do something to better suit his fiery nature, eh? Well, he has to eat breakfast just like anyone else. But, just so you won't be disappointed, here's him doing something wacky.
Bloodsage: Wuh oh...get the wipes, woman, I just shat myself.
Hilarous!
End Episode 11
Disclaimer: I'm just kidding, I love all living things.
The fastest draw in the Crest.
"The Internet is MY critical thinking course." -Maradon
"Gambling for the husband, an abortion for the wife and fireworks for the kids they chose to keep? Fuck you, Disneyland. The Pine Ridge Indian Reservation is the happiest place on Earth." -JooJooFlop
And feel free to write me in if you can use me. You can put my schtick anywhere you want.
No, Really. Bite me.
Seriously though, greatness!
sigpic courtesy of This Guy, original modified by me
Liam: Is everyone ready for today's FANTASTIC INVENTION?
Audience: WHOOOOOOOOOO!
Vorago: Woeoeoeoeooo!
Liam: Is everyone ready for our host?
Vorago: I AM! I AM!
Liam: Then giiiiiive it up for our wildly amazing host...DELIDGAMONDIE JONES!
A fat, bald, ugly Canadian man scampers onstage, wearing a colorful shirt.
Delidgamondie: Good evening, everyone! I'm Delidgamondie, or as the ladies call me...Bigdick McLargenuts.
Vorago: HA HA HA HA HA HE'S GOT A BIG DICK I BET HE'S A HIT WITH THE LADIES
Delidgamondie: And you all know my announcer, Liam Wheywhey.
Liam: Har har har!
Vorago: I GET IT HE'S LIKE ED MCMAHON
Delidgamondie: ...anyways, we've got some delightful products up here tonight. Our first invention comes from a man who will say only three words before he meets his grisly end...please welcome, INFERNO-SPIRIT!
A sour-looking Canadian stumbles out on stage, wheeling a cart with him.
Delidgamondie: Hey there, IS. What do you have for us today?
Inferno-Spirit: These ginsu knives-
Suddenly a red-clad samurai charges onstage and decapitates Inferno-Spirit.
Bajah: Pretenders! I knew the Ginsu daimyo, and you sir, are no Ginsu daimyo!
Delidgamondie: Oh! Looks like he felt that worse than Liam felt up his ex-wife!
Liam: Ho ho ho! Too cruel! Too cruel!
Vorago: HA HA HA HA HA HA HE CAN'T FEEL ANYTHING UP HE'S SO CLUMSY AND SILLY
Bajah: KYAAAAA!
With a battle howl, Bajah slices through Delidgamondie's torso.
Delidgamondie: Ouch! Well, I've been destroyed, friends, so it looks like our show is over for tonight! Please give a big hand to our special guests: Inferno-Spirit and this wacky, blood-crazed Samurai!
The audience applauds madly and for no reason, Vorago spontaneously combusts. The samurai bows.
Bajah: Arigato.
Kagrama: *from off-stage* taek the baettel to MOERDORR!
Bajah: HONSHU!
With a cry, Bajah flees off-stage as he is suddenly chased by a crew consisting of a metal-clad bounty hunter, a crazy captain, and Addy.
Addy: ^_^
As soon as they charge out of the studio, the upper body of Delidgamondie slowly begins to rise, his skin clinging to his bones as he crawls across the stage towards the audience in an undead shamble.
Suddenly, he lunges up and sinks his teeth into Liam's throat.
Liam: Wuh oh! My jugular! Ho ho hooooo no, Delidgamondie!
The zombified Canadian begins to feast on his announcer's brains.
Delidgamondie: Tune in...*chew*...next week...*snap*...when we have on our show...*munchmunch*...a talking dog...*slurp*...and Ctrl-Alt-Delete...*bite*...who will be represented in this episode as follows.
Ctrl-Alt-Delete:
Delidgamondie: Thank you, and *munch* goodnight. Good God, Liam! Your brains are mushy and unsatisfying! Maybe it's too much porn!
Liam: Brains! Riiiiight, Delidgamondie!
End Episode 12
sigpic courtesy of This Guy, original modified by me
quote:
Nae spewed forth this undeniable truth:
I am both shocked and amazed!
Shock and Awe! Shock and Awe! <tickles Nae> ^.^
quote:
Katrinity thought this was the Ricky Martin Fan Club Forum and wrote:
Shock and Awe! Shock and Awe! <tickles Nae> ^.^
..a little lower and to the right!
quote:
Everyone wondered WTF when Nae wrote:
..a little lower and to the right!
<scritchs and scratches Nae good with sharp fox nails> Better? 
quote:
Katrinity had this to say about Cuba:
<scritchs and scratches Nae good with sharp fox nails> Better?
oh le purrrrrrrrrr!!!
But, to tide you over, here are five words to incite your orgasms.
Blindy: Welcome to Jack-In-The-Box. I lost my wang in the deep frier. May I take your order?
Dr. Cysa: Gee, I dunno...maybe I want a cheeseburger...but I think it might make me fat.
Gadani: YOU'RE ALREADY FAT!
Dr. Cysa: ...yeah, that's true.
Rodent King: Is this the "Nobodies Eat Free" line?
Hireko: Not anymore. Now it's the "Die Horribly by One of the Regular Characters" line.
Rodent King: Oh good to kno-HUWAGH!
The smelly, ugly rodent is blasted to pieces as a Bounty Hunter charges on-stage. At that same moment, a red-clad samurai decapitates Dr. Cysa. Kagrama doesn't kill Hireko, though...but she gets whapped by a trout. What a character he is.
BUT WHAT'S THIS?! A crowd in the corner notices the fight!
Katrinity: We can't let this go on!
Mightion: Let this go on, we cannot!
Delphi: Something must be done!
Skaw: Then we all know what to do...
Darius: LET OUR POWERS COMBINE!
The three nerds throw their ring-clad hands towards each other.
Katrinity: FLATULENCE!
Mightion: SARCASM!
Delphi: BLUNTNESS!
Skaw: POOR ATTITUDE!
Darius: HEART!
Skaw: Haw haw, you're the little fag with the monkey.
Darius: ...shut up.
A sudden glowing figure appears, looking much like a perfect adonis, except round and somewhat greasy. The round creature suddenly materializes.
Sean: With your powers combined, I am...CAPTAIN JACKASS!
Various Douches: GO JACKASS!
Sean: WHAT'S THIS?!? A motley crew of people preparing to fight in a Jack-In-The-Box! Sounds like an excellent time to make a pun!
Sean flies over Blindy and pours a coke over him.
Sean: Why don't you...cool off, hothead! HA HA HA HA!
Blindy: ...that was terrible. I DON'T WANT TO LIVE ANYMORE!
Blindy dunks his ugly face in the deep frier.
TO BE CONTINUED>A?!?!!?
Stick around.
It's not something people hear about.
quote:
The logic train ran off the tracks when Darius! said:
Haw haw, you're the little fag with the monkey.
sigpic courtesy of This Guy, original modified by me
--Satan, quoted by John Milton
Thenagain I'm a very very tired boy. ((((((((((((((((
