1. All people on the board who play as monsters (including furries) will be killed for experience and their pelts.
2. All people on the board who play as wizards or sorcerers will be killed for their magical treasure.
2a. The sole exception to the above rule is if the magic-user in question is one of those sultry-type wizards who'll give you their treasure for killing their enemies.
2b. Failure on the part of sultry-type wizards to issue quests to kill their enemies will result in the sultry-type wizards being killed.
3. Those on the boards who play as rogues are hereby required to carry around a bunch of shady, illegal merchandise and wear hoods.
4. All divine-spell types on the boards from clerics, to druids, to other critters have two options: give a quest which will have the reward of all your money or start summoning an ancient evil outsider/beast so there is an excuse to kill you.
5. Everyone who just wants to be a regular joe is hereby required to have some major problem every week so you can send adventurers to solve it and give them all your money.
6. All people on the board who play as some lame deity or other divine force will be killed and their powers assimilated.
7. All spells cast must have flashy effects and be visually impressive. Subtlety is hereby illegal.
8. The entire population of average ECers must vacate their homes and go live in a village together. This serves two benefits: 1) All your problems and quests will be in one place, and 2) Your houses can be bulldozed for dungeon building.
9. Every house more than two stories must have some form of hostile guardian(s).
And finally...
10. JooJooFlop is hereby recognized as an Iron Golem. Anyone who wants to can take him over as their servant.
[ 07-01-2002: Message edited by: Waisztarroz ]
Yes, that's right, hot live sex!
Okay, I really need a servent, and since I lack the skills to capture my own, I would like someone to capture JJF for me, paint him nice vibrant colors slap a bow-tie and a monocole on him.
Okay?
Seeing as I cant have my elemental with me all the time 
On that note, who wants to go on a quest to kill the evil cookie thief, Snack-ems? I'll give diamond-encrusted cookies as reward ^.^
quote:
Nobody really understood why King Parcelan wrote:
Not today, weirdo.
Can I kill you?
Yes, that's right, hot live sex!
quote:
5. Everyone who just wants to be a regular joe is hereby required to have some major problem every week so you can send adventurers to solve it and give them all your money.
Sentow says, '(sob, sob) I never thought I'd see the day when she [left me].'
Hit Dice: 20d8+78 (235 hp)
Special Attacks: Mesmerize (Ex), Corrupt to Evil (Su), Summon Piglet (Sp)
Special Qualities: Stuffed With Fluff (Ex)
Bring it.
quote:
Sentow wrote this stupid crap:
Sentow says, '(sob, sob) I never thought I'd see the day when she [left me].'
left me [ 07-01-2002: Message edited by: Mr. Wilams ]
left
me
left you
day she left you
who left me
who left you
wtf
/petition
quote:
Mr. Wilams had this to say about Cuba:
left me
left
me
left you
day she left you
who left me
who left you
wtf
/petition
Give it up, man, he's broken.
Yes, that's right, hot live sex!quote:
who left you
My oldest daughter, Yaddayadda. She's set off to become a sultry wizard who will give away treasure to those who kill her [enemies].
Of course I wish her well, but I wish she'd find something more [meaningful] to do with her life.
quote:
/petition
Thanok tells you, 'Hello, GM Thanok here! GO FUCK YOURSELF!
Gufor tells you, 'Hello, Lead GM Gufor here. We apologize that it's Thanok's last day.'
[EDIT] OH NO NOW I'LL NEVER GET MY EPIC! [ 07-01-2002: Message edited by: Sentow ]
[ANOTHER EDIT] DAMN IT.
Edit- Unless you want to count me as Hades. In all my level 20 Fighter/10 Assassain/10 (Can't recall his last class) badness. [ 07-01-2002: Message edited by: The Black Mage... ]
As for me, I am a goddess, not a furry. Furries are some concoction made up from Disney and modern peoples. I was worship thousands of years ago by hordes of people. I even had my own capital city and temples all over. I was the most beloved deity in ancient Egypt.
quote:
King Parcelan painfully thought these words up:
Dancin' Pooh
Small Outsider (Evil)Hit Dice: 20d8+78 (235 hp)
Special Attacks: Mesmerize (Ex), Corrupt to Evil (Su), Summon Piglet (Sp)
Special Qualities: Stuffed With Fluff (Ex)Bring it.
*spews soda on his screen*
thanks parce.
*sighs*
*goes into the house and leaves the angry R0x0R and Big Deth outside*
sigpic courtesy of This Guy, original modified by me
I'm fucked either way! Cthulhu or Ozimander!
Cthulhu
sigpic courtesy of This Guy, original modified by me
Grabs his fedora, his suitcase, a teddy bear and a comb and heads to stay with Lyinar and Ja'Deth
Cthulhu
Avon calling.
Big Deth: I Do Not Need Rouge. Shut Up.
R0x0R: Yeah you do. All pasty and silvery.
Big Deth: My Date Would Not Approve
R0x0R: That wasn't a date! That was an Apparatus of Kwalish!
Big Deth: Same Thing.
R0x0R: you weirdo. No...we don't need any avon. Thanks, though. [ 07-01-2002: Message edited by: Ja'Deth Issar Ka'bael ]
sigpic courtesy of This Guy, original modified by me
quote:
The logic train ran off the tracks when Ja'Deth Issar Ka'bael said:
R0x0R: Big Deth needs some rouge. You got any rouge?Big Deth: I Do Not Need Rouge. Shut Up.
R0x0R: Yeah you do. All pasty and silvery.
Big Deth: My Date Would Not Approve
R0x0R: That wasn't a date! That was an Apparatus of Kwalish!
Big Deth: Same Thing.
R0x0R: you weirdo. No...we don't need any avon. Thanks, though.
That large text made your sig huge. 
Yes, that's right, hot live sex!
quote:I can live with that.
How.... King Parcelan.... uughhhhhh:
3. Those on the boards who play as rogues are hereby required to carry around a bunch of shady, illegal merchandise and wear hoods.
quote:
Check out the big brain on Waisztarroz!
That large text made your sig huge.
[ 07-01-2002: Message edited by: Admiral Darndo ]
Barbarians
-Whenever you meet any of the following criteria: happy, sad, angry, confused, heartburn; it is your duty to scream and throw something into the wall.
-When in doubt: hit it with an axe!
Bards
-You do the following: identify stuff to save us money, make a fool out of yourself, and stay behind to get eaten while we run away. Remember it well.
-When in doubt: act like a complete pansy...then hit it with a lute!
Clerics
-You now exist only to heal and turn undead. When faced with any other conflict, you must scream like a pansy and run away shouting stuff about your god.
-When in doubt: finish healing the others, then finish turning the undead, then finish buffing the others...then hit it with a mace!
Druids
-What the fuck are you doing out of your forests, where you SHOULD be giving us quests? Treehugging dorks...
-When in doubt...hit it with a piece of wood!
Fighters
-Do whatever someone else tells you to. Save your muscles for fighting, not thinking.
-When in doubt...hit it with anything you can get your deadly little hands on!
Monks
-Pick yourselves up off your meditating asses to go kick something when it shows up. And be sure to do a lot of screaming.
-When in doubt...kick it!
Paladins
-Remember: You have a code of conduct to uphold.
-Remember: If you shout "In the name of <Whatevergodyouserve>" before you attack something, it's all good!
-When in doubt...hit it with a lance!
Rangers
-If it's a favored enemy, it's your duty to kill it. Even if that Orc has saved countless lives, established orphanages across the world, and was blessed by Pelor himself, who cares? You get a +4 bonus to attack him!
-When in doubt...shoot it with a bow, then hit it with two swords!
Rogues
-Laws of Roguery: The only time you should come out of the shadows is when: we need a trap disarmed, we need you to stab something, we need you to pick a lock, we need you to hurry your slow move silently ass up!
-When in doubt...stab it!
Sorcerors
-Wear ill-fitting clothing, make a lot of sparkly magic; if things aren't dead by the time you're done doing all that, you're doing something wrong.
-When in doubt...blast it with a fireball! Then run away as the monster comes to whallop your ass!
Wizards
-Do everything the sorceror does, but do it better.
quote:
King Parcelan stopped beating up furries long enough to write:
And now, some guidelines for those of you who become adventurers...Barbarians
-Whenever you meet any of the following criteria: happy, sad, angry, confused, heartburn; it is your duty to scream and throw something into the wall.-When in doubt: hit it with an axe!
Bards
-You do the following: identify stuff to save us money, make a fool out of yourself, and stay behind to get eaten while we run away. Remember it well.-When in doubt: act like a complete pansy...then hit it with a lute!
Clerics
-You now exist only to heal and turn undead. When faced with any other conflict, you must scream like a pansy and run away shouting stuff about your god.-When in doubt: finish healing the others, then finish turning the undead, then finish buffing the others...then hit it with a mace!
Druids
-What the fuck are you doing out of your forests, where you SHOULD be giving us quests? Treehugging dorks...-When in doubt...hit it with a piece of wood!
Fighters
-Do whatever someone else tells you to. Save your muscles for fighting, not thinking.-When in doubt...hit it with anything you can get your deadly little hands on!
Monks
-Pick yourselves up off your meditating asses to go kick something when it shows up. And be sure to do a lot of screaming.-When in doubt...kick it!
Paladins
-Remember: You have a code of conduct to uphold.-Remember: If you shout "In the name of <Whatevergodyouserve>" before you attack something, it's all good!
-When in doubt...hit it with a lance!
Rangers
-If it's a favored enemy, it's your duty to kill it. Even if that Orc has saved countless lives, established orphanages across the world, and was blessed by Pelor himself, who cares? You get a +4 bonus to attack him!-When in doubt...shoot it with a bow, then hit it with two swords!
Rogues
-Laws of Roguery: The only time you should come out of the shadows is when: we need a trap disarmed, we need you to stab something, we need you to pick a lock, we need you to hurry your slow move silently ass up!-When in doubt...stab it!
Sorcerors
-Wear ill-fitting clothing, make a lot of sparkly magic; if things aren't dead by the time you're done doing all that, you're doing something wrong.-When in doubt...blast it with a fireball! Then run away as the monster comes to whallop your ass!
Wizards
-Do everything the sorceror does, but do it better.
Sounds like EQ.
sigpic courtesy of This Guy, original modified by me
Now open up.
Would you like some pizza instead while you wait out there? I can order some.
sigpic courtesy of This Guy, original modified by me
quote:
Admiral Darndo got all f'ed up on Angel Dust and wrote:
[QUOTE]Check out the big brain on Waisztarroz!
[qb]That large text made your sig huge.
It's not that way any more because he edited it.
Yes, that's right, hot live sex!He keeps winning at the weekly arcane caster poker games. We suspect he's cheating.
sigpic courtesy of This Guy, original modified by me
