quote:

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Ruv attempted to be funny by writing:
3 and 2.

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Ummm, that's not quite right.

*Hulks lurkingly*

Nope, not that, either.

*Menaces hulkingly*

Roger, uh-oh, over.

*Lurks menacingly*

Rar.

{pwned by UBB. . .how will I ever thwart Snoota?}

[ 12-29-2003: Message edited by: Bloodsage ]

Upon his arrival, he was swarmed by beautiful gypsy dancers, who promptly spirited Lashanna away for their secret gypsy sessions and left Sir Snoota fuming. He angrily reached for his lance; those women that did have the shaft between his legs inside them would have the shaft in his hand inside them.

"Hail, sir knight!" came a voice. Sir Snoota looked up to a see a lovely, blue-skinned gypsy approach him. "I am Xyrra, leader of the clan of the Erotic Lesbian Fetish."

"An ELF, eh?" Sir Snoota asked, staying his lance. "I require food for myself and my pig and lots of oils and massaging for my elf. Make haste, female!"

"We shall provide you with sausage and slop for you and your mount," Xyrra said, "and Asian-style massages for your companion. But we would ask a favor first."

"Speak then," Sir Snoota said, "but make it hasty and be certain to have a pie ready afterwards."

"Our bard, the sole male of our group, recently went to the river nearby to satisfy his...urges," Xyrra explained. "Living in a group full of sensuous, bi-curious gypsies has left him in...hard times."

"Your bard masturbates a lot? I can rectify that, but it shall not be pretty," Snoota said, reaching for his sword.

"No, sir knight!" Xyrra continued. "He has not returned! We throw ourselves on your mercy to go and locate him. Should you succeed, you and your mount shall have a feast and your companion shall be mounted post-haste!"

"LET'S DO IT!" came Lashanna's cry from a nearby covered wagon.

Snoota raised an eyebrow in thought...

What should Snoota say?
1: "So long as you sex my elf up good, I shall be happy to locate him."
2: "I'll require some gold and lube, wench. This service shall not be free."
3: "I shall go off and seek my sausage elsewhere."

1

1

Though, 1 is better.

Though his pig was tired, it still made good time to the river. With keen eyes, Sir Snoota scanned the roaring river for any sign of the missing bard. He shouldn't be hard to recognize (it was well-known that bards were fags and fags were easy to spot).

Suddenly, he spied the bard, clad in his many brightly-colored garments and holding his lute forlornly. No wonder, Snoota thought, for he was sitting on a rock in the middle of the river.

"Ho there, faggot!" Sir Snoota called out to the bard. "I have come to rescue you!"

"Lo! A beefy man-knight to save me!" the bard cried back. "I am Vorbis of the Gypsies, and I am trapped here on this rock!"

"Yes, I can see that, I am not retarded," Sir Snoota replied, "how did you get there, o anal-lover?"

The bard opened his mouth to reply, but a booming voice from the river itself cut him off before he even had a chance. The waters churned and bubbled violently as the river shouted angrily:

"I, Katrinity, Guardian of the River, have imprisoned your insolent bard upon the rock for he did not pay tribute to my beauty! And so, he shall stay there until he grows old and ugly!"

Sir Snoota raised an eyebrow; it was well-known that river guardians were vain and slights to their beauty were not taken lightly. But they were also very powerful, and could be difficult to deal with.

"Lo!" the River Guardian roared. "I shall release him if you buy my favor with a poem about my beauteous countenance! I know well that knight-errants are famous composers! Shower me with praise, or face your doom!"

Sir Snoota stopped and pondered...

What should Sir Snoota do?
1: Compose a poem! It shall be delightful!
2: Fight her! May Nem-xicus strike true and shaft Katrinity good!
3: Attempt to bribe the greedy spirit! She cannot resist the lure of gold!

quote:

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Ja'Deth Issar Ka'bael wrote this stupid crap:
3! 3!

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