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Topic: Texas
Pesco
Is a copyright of Peachis. Don't underestimate his pants, either.
posted 06-06-2002 02:35:12 PM
That picture, with the Panhandle and the Gulf Coast, and the Red River and the Rio Grande is as much a part of you as anything ever will be. As soon as anyone anywhere in the world looks at that they know what it is. It's TEXAS.

Pick any kid off the street in Japan and draw him a picture of Texas in the dirt, and he'll know what it is. What happens if I show you a picture of any other state? You'll get it sooner or later, but who else in the world would? Even if you do, does it ever stir any feelings in you?

In every man, woman and child on this little rock the Good Lord put us on, there is somewhere in them a person who wishes just once he could be a real live Texan and get up on a horse or ride in a pickup or dance at a dancehall. Did you ever hear anyone in a bar say, "Wow....so you're from Kansas. Cool. Tell me about it."?

There is some bit of Texas in everyone. Do you know why? Because Texas is Texas. Texas is the Alamo. Texas is 183 men standing in a church, facing thousands of Mexican nationals fighting for freedom, who had the chance to walk out and save themselves, but stayed.

We send our kids to schools named William B. Travis and Bowie and do you know why? Because those men saw a line in the sand and they decided to be heroes.

John Wayne paid to do the movie himself. That is Texas.

Texas is Sam Houston capturing Santa Anna at San Jacinto.

Texas is Juneteenth and Texas Independence Day.

Texas is huge forests of Piney Woods like the Davy Crocket National Forest.

Texas is breathtaking mountains in Big Bend.

Texas is shiny skyscrapers in Houston and Dallas.

Texas is the uniqueness of Austin.

Texas is a world record bass from places like Lake Fork.

Texas is the best colleges around. From Houston to Lubbock and everywhere in between.

Texas is Mexican food like nowhere in the world, even Mexico.

Texas is larger-than-life legends like Willie Nelson and Buddy Holly, Earl Campbell and Nolan Ryan, Denton Cooley and Michael DeBakey, Lyndon Johnson and George Bush.

Texas is great companies like Texas Instruments, Dell Computer and Compaq.

Texas is huge herds of cattle and miles of crops.

Texas is skies blackened with doves and fields full of deer.

Texas is the best Barbecue anywhere. Period.

Texas is the nicest people you'll ever meet. Anywhere. Not to mention, the prettiest girls.

Texas is the best music, with the best musicians in the world.

Texas is beaches, deserts, lakes and rivers, mountains and prairies.

If it isn't in Texas, you don't need it. No one does anything bigger or better.

By federal law Texas is the only state in the U.S. that can fly its flag at the same height as the U.S. Flag. Think about that for a second.

You fly the Stars and Stripes at 20 feet in Maryland, or California, or Maine, and your state flag, whatever it is, flies at 17. You fly the Stars and Stripes in front of Pine Tree High in Longview at 20 feet, and the Lone Star flies at 20 feet. Do you know why? Our capitol is the only one in the country that is taller than the capitol building in D.C. We signed that and the flag height in as part of the deal when we came on.

That's the best part right there.... when we came on, Texas was its own country. The Republic of Texas.

Aren't you proud to be a Texan? You should be.

God Bless Texas.

[ 06-06-2002: Message edited by: Pesco ]

Admiral Darndo
Pancake
posted 06-06-2002 02:37:29 PM
aye, with pride.
(Crap.I used the humans language again.) -monkey
Mortious
Gluttonous Overlard
posted 06-06-2002 02:38:05 PM
Rednecks.
Azakias
Never wore the pants, thus still wields the power of unused (_|_)
posted 06-06-2002 02:38:27 PM
I wanna be a Texan....
"Age by age have men stood up and said to the world, 'From what has come before me, I was forged, but I am new and greater than my forebears.' And so each man walks the world in ruin, abandoned and untried. Less than the whole of his being"
JooJooFlop
Hungry Hungry Hippo
posted 06-06-2002 02:39:03 PM
I wonder if all this would hold true if Texas wasn't the largest state in the USA.
I don't know how to be sexy. If I catch a girl looking at me and our eyes lock, I panic and open mine wider. Then I lick my lips and rub my genitals. And mouth the words "You're dead."
/dev/null
Pancake
posted 06-06-2002 02:39:27 PM
Texas: It's not just a State, it's a whole other Country.

What I find amusing is, Texas holds the largest percentage of US troops in the US...

Beep. Beep. Beep... Ohh... I think my porridge is done.
My fellow Americans, as you know, my foreign policy can be summed up in five words: "Iludium-236 Explosive Space Modulator."
When it comes down to it, searching the web without Google is like straining sewage with your teeth.
Pesco
Is a copyright of Peachis. Don't underestimate his pants, either.
posted 06-06-2002 02:39:33 PM
quote:
From the book of JooJooFlop, chapter 3, verse 16:
I wonder if all this would hold true if Texas wasn't the largest state in the USA.

It actually isnt.

Squire Twitch
Pancake
posted 06-06-2002 02:40:16 PM
quote:
JooJooFlop had this to say about Cuba:
I wonder if all this would hold true if Texas wasn't the largest state in the USA.

Ever heard of Alaska?

My parents just came back from a planet where the dominant lifeform had no bilateral symmetry, and all I got was this stupid F-Shirt
/dev/null
Pancake
posted 06-06-2002 02:40:29 PM
quote:
This insanity brought to you by JooJooFlop:
I wonder if all this would hold true if Texas wasn't the largest state in the USA.

*wrong*

Alaska is the Largest. California has the highest population. Texas is just the best.

Beep. Beep. Beep... Ohh... I think my porridge is done.
My fellow Americans, as you know, my foreign policy can be summed up in five words: "Iludium-236 Explosive Space Modulator."
When it comes down to it, searching the web without Google is like straining sewage with your teeth.
Admiral Darndo
Pancake
posted 06-06-2002 02:40:45 PM
quote:
Mortious's unholy Backstreet Boys obsession manifested in:
Rednecks.

Only if your east of round rock.
(Crap.I used the humans language again.) -monkey
JooJooFlop
Hungry Hungry Hippo
posted 06-06-2002 02:40:58 PM
quote:
Squire Twitch probably says this to all the girls:
Ever heard of Alaska?

The free states don't count.

I don't know how to be sexy. If I catch a girl looking at me and our eyes lock, I panic and open mine wider. Then I lick my lips and rub my genitals. And mouth the words "You're dead."
Mortious
Gluttonous Overlard
posted 06-06-2002 02:41:38 PM
Them roadkills 'r fine eatin'!
Squire Twitch
Pancake
posted 06-06-2002 02:42:24 PM
quote:
Admiral Darndo was listening to Cher while typing:
[QUOTE]Mortious's unholy Backstreet Boys obsession manifested in:
[qb]Rednecks.


Only if your east of round rock.[/QB][/QUOTE]

Or west of Austin.

My parents just came back from a planet where the dominant lifeform had no bilateral symmetry, and all I got was this stupid F-Shirt
Suddar Williams
SUDAR WILAMS
posted 06-06-2002 02:42:38 PM
I live in Maine.

I have absolutely nothing to be proud of.

Yay for...uh...Funtown. Sure. Funtown.

Bajah
Thooooooor
posted 06-06-2002 02:42:58 PM
Damn, that almost brought a tear to my eye.

I have to disagree with that prettiest girls comments.

EC is example enough that the prettiest girls live elsewhere, or move out of Texas

JooJooFlop
Hungry Hungry Hippo
posted 06-06-2002 02:44:29 PM
quote:
Bajah enlisted the help of an infinite number of monkeys to write:
I have to disagree with that prettiest girls comments.

EC is example enough that the prettiest girls live elsewhere, or move out of Texas


Are Texans known for their ass-kissing?

I don't know how to be sexy. If I catch a girl looking at me and our eyes lock, I panic and open mine wider. Then I lick my lips and rub my genitals. And mouth the words "You're dead."
CBTao
Pancake
posted 06-06-2002 02:45:07 PM
quote:
JooJooFlop wrote this stupid crap:
I wonder if all this would hold true if Texas wasn't the largest state in the USA.

See: Alaska.

Bajah
Thooooooor
posted 06-06-2002 02:45:16 PM
quote:
There was much rejoicing when JooJooFlop said this:
Are Texans known for their ass-kissing?

Ass-kicking, mebbe.
Admiral Darndo
Pancake
posted 06-06-2002 02:45:55 PM
quote:
We were all impressed when Squire Twitch wrote:
Or west of Austin.

But isn't that the Truck-er owned part of Texas?
(Crap.I used the humans language again.) -monkey
Squire Twitch
Pancake
posted 06-06-2002 02:47:05 PM
quote:
Bajah had this to say about Cuba:

Ass-kicking, mebbe.[/QB]


And they make the best "Whipped" boys to have as slaves.

My parents just came back from a planet where the dominant lifeform had no bilateral symmetry, and all I got was this stupid F-Shirt
/dev/null
Pancake
posted 06-06-2002 02:47:32 PM
Some of the FES's we got in highschool were hot...

Especially the German one... /drool

Beep. Beep. Beep... Ohh... I think my porridge is done.
My fellow Americans, as you know, my foreign policy can be summed up in five words: "Iludium-236 Explosive Space Modulator."
When it comes down to it, searching the web without Google is like straining sewage with your teeth.
Faeth Es'Braewyn
No Breasts. :(
posted 06-06-2002 02:52:54 PM
quote:
Bajah had this to say about Reading Rainbow:
I have to disagree with that prettiest girls comments.


Not entierly true, but subject to opinions.

Looking at pop culture, and recent pageant histories. Only two states run neck and neck for highest winning standards in an American Beauty pageant. Texas and Georiga. Texas still beats Georgia by a high margin. When refering to most supermodels of American decent, a high majority were born or raised in Texas. The most recognized cheerleading group in the world is the Dallas Cowboy Cheerleaders. The most scouted Colledge for modeling intent in America is the "University of Texas" or "Rice" followed by "A&M". Closet colledge after the Texas colledges is "Penn State" and "UCLA"

Texas has the highest gross majority of, by popular standard, most attractive women. This isn't to say there aren't attractive women elsewhere, but few compare to Texas girls. This is typically accepted as a fact, even if it is based off popular opinion.

Romantic bias is excluded.

"Born of fire, forged with steel, I am the hunter that you know, but will never see..."
Synjari
Warrior Princess
Cookie Seraphim!
posted 06-06-2002 02:55:53 PM
*smiles**bearhugs Pesco* You make me miss home SOO much.
"Villiany wears many masks, none of which are more dangerous than virtue." - "Sleepy Hollow"
JooJooFlop
Hungry Hungry Hippo
posted 06-06-2002 02:56:02 PM
Are there people in Texas like the people on King of the Hill or is that just a parody?
I don't know how to be sexy. If I catch a girl looking at me and our eyes lock, I panic and open mine wider. Then I lick my lips and rub my genitals. And mouth the words "You're dead."
Admiral Darndo
Pancake
posted 06-06-2002 02:56:55 PM
quote:
JooJooFlop stopped beating up furries long enough to write:
Are there people in Texas like the people on King of the Hill or is that just a parody?

Mabey Dale.
(Crap.I used the humans language again.) -monkey
Faeth Es'Braewyn
No Breasts. :(
posted 06-06-2002 02:57:18 PM
quote:
JooJooFlop's unholy Backstreet Boys obsession manifested in:
Are there people in Texas like the people on King of the Hill or is that just a parody?

Thats Arkansas..

I'm getting tired of having to explain these differences.

"Born of fire, forged with steel, I am the hunter that you know, but will never see..."
JooJooFlop
Hungry Hungry Hippo
posted 06-06-2002 02:59:29 PM
Is it true Texans refer to Arkansas as "our septic tank?"

[ 06-06-2002: Message edited by: JooJooFlop ]

I don't know how to be sexy. If I catch a girl looking at me and our eyes lock, I panic and open mine wider. Then I lick my lips and rub my genitals. And mouth the words "You're dead."
Faeth Es'Braewyn
No Breasts. :(
posted 06-06-2002 03:00:16 PM
As an example take two of the hottest women here.

Piper is Texan

Lashanna is Georgian.

"Born of fire, forged with steel, I am the hunter that you know, but will never see..."
Faeth Es'Braewyn
No Breasts. :(
posted 06-06-2002 03:02:04 PM
quote:
JooJooFlop impressed everyone with:
Is it true Texans refer to Arkansas as "our spetic tank?"

Yes.

Shit still rolls down hill, but then Arkansas is is actually a depression so it catches everything.

"Born of fire, forged with steel, I am the hunter that you know, but will never see..."
Cadga
Quite Insane
posted 06-06-2002 03:02:15 PM
i wish i was a texan
then i can say Ya'll and get away with it
Professional Sinner/Heretic
My mindless dribble
Fizodeth
an unflattering title
posted 06-06-2002 03:02:43 PM
*Jumps and Cheers at Pesco*

well said man.. well said...

Im not patriotic about very many things.. but when someone starts spoutin off about Texas I get HIGHLY offended..

plain and simple: Texas Rocks...

JooJooFlop
Hungry Hungry Hippo
posted 06-06-2002 03:05:03 PM
Can an average Texan defeat a ninja in unarmed combat?

How about if they both had big sticks?

I don't know how to be sexy. If I catch a girl looking at me and our eyes lock, I panic and open mine wider. Then I lick my lips and rub my genitals. And mouth the words "You're dead."
Faeth Es'Braewyn
No Breasts. :(
posted 06-06-2002 03:09:14 PM
quote:
And I was all like 'Oh yeah?' and JooJooFlop was all like:
Can an average Texan defeat a ninja in unarmed combat?

How about if they both had big sticks?



Ninja? What's a Ninja?

They taste good?

Will it foot over my hood if I have to strap it down? I'd hate to leave a prize kill to rott.

"Born of fire, forged with steel, I am the hunter that you know, but will never see..."
Pesco
Is a copyright of Peachis. Don't underestimate his pants, either.
posted 06-06-2002 03:09:33 PM
quote:
JooJooFlop stumbled drunkenly to the keyboard and typed:
Can an average Texan defeat a ninja in unarmed combat?

How about if they both had big sticks?


My BOOM Stick.

Matilda Jane
ph33r my MIRVs
posted 06-06-2002 03:11:51 PM
That was a good read Pesco and it's all so very true.
There was a signature here... it's gone now.
Azakias
Never wore the pants, thus still wields the power of unused (_|_)
posted 06-06-2002 03:16:16 PM
quote:
Everyone wondered WTF when Pesco wrote:
My BOOM Stick.

(Obligitory vague innuendo)

"Age by age have men stood up and said to the world, 'From what has come before me, I was forged, but I am new and greater than my forebears.' And so each man walks the world in ruin, abandoned and untried. Less than the whole of his being"
Naota Nandaba
Don't ask me about any goddamned bannings!
posted 06-06-2002 03:19:14 PM
I like the South.
Nothing amazing happens here.
Only the ordinary.
Fizodeth
an unflattering title
posted 06-06-2002 03:23:02 PM
Ninjas < Texans...
Gikk
SCA babe!!!
posted 06-06-2002 03:28:11 PM
Ohio. SUCKS.

>.<

JooJooFlop
Hungry Hungry Hippo
posted 06-06-2002 03:29:40 PM
If I were to steal all of Texas's beer supply, plant it in the Middle East and blame it on terrorists, what would happen?
I don't know how to be sexy. If I catch a girl looking at me and our eyes lock, I panic and open mine wider. Then I lick my lips and rub my genitals. And mouth the words "You're dead."
All times are US/Eastern
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