quote:
Check out the big brain on WaisztarrozBarrimas!
You better tell your boyfriend if "it" isn't coming out right. Might be something wrong.
You get the ofical title of ASSHEAD! Wear it proudly ya dumbass
Sig pic done with Microsoft paint, Work that doobie Pikachu.
[ 12-27-2001: Message edited by: Mooj ]
Karnaj: Welcome back, we're about to get this fight underway. The EverCresters have split off into different groups in order to combat this foe more effectively. The fights will be between the Tarrasque and these different groups.
Karnaj glances back at the ring.
Karnaj: It looks like the first group is ready to begin. They're about to fight the Tarrasque at full strength. Let us pray for them...
ROUND ONE: TARRASQUE vs THE LOSERS OF EVERCREST
FIGHT!
A small group of gangly, pimply-skinned, mussy-haired, sex-starved and portly munchkins scurry into the ring.
Delidgamond: In the name of the dorks! You fall today!
Ozius: Uhh...how should we start killing?
Bane: Let's throw trekkie shirts at it!
Delphi: No! Let's try to seduce it!
Strider: I'm all for that. That's one sexy beast...hey there, Tarrasque. Can I call you...Terry?
Tarrasque bellows in anger and stomps Ozius and Delphi flat beneath its massive foot.
Delidgamond: There is no time to lose! We must unite our powers!
Strider: Yes...it's time for the...
Bane: LOSER ATTACK!
The remaining Losers rip off their shirts to reveal strange symbols emblazoned on their pudgy stomachs. Delidgamond has a maple leaf, Strider a lipstick smudge, and Bane a Star Trek fleet insignia.
Bane: CARE BEARS...er...uh...LOSERS! LOOOOOOOOOSE!
Bright, shiny effects begin emanating from the symbols and zap the Tarrasque. The beast, unaffected, raises an eyebrow.
Delidgamond: By the way, what does this do?
Bane: As far as I know, it just irritates people.
Strider: So...I'm NOT getting laid?
The Tarrasque lifts its already dirtied foot and smashes the remainder of the Losers beneath its foot.
WINNER: TARRASQUE!
ROUND TWO: TARRASQUE vs THE FIRESTARTERS OF EVERCREST
FIGHT!
A small horde of angry, irritable men and women and one monkey hops into the ring, ready to spill blood.
Bloodsage: You may have bested the Losers...
Lyinar: But we're here to stop you...
Waisztarroz: The only way we know how...
Azizza: BY FLAMING YOU INTO OBLIVION!
The Firestarters proceed to let loose with their best flames!
Bloodsage: You're nothing but a craven little coward!
Azizza: You probably support software pirating, too! Jackass!
Waisztarroz: ur ghey!
Lyinar: ABUSE! ABUSE! YOU'RE ABUSING YOUR REGENERATION POWERS! I don't know how, but Drysart is undoubtedly behind all of this!
The Tarrasque looks at the Firestarters in confusion, apparently unaffected.
Bloodsage: Say, fellas...what's the intelligence score of the Tarrasque?
Waisztarroz: Oh...about 5.
Bloodsage: So that means...he can't understand us!
Lyinar: Curses! Drysart must have lowered his intelligence! The fiend...
Azizza: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAIEEEEEE!
The Tarrasque leans down and gobbles the Firestarters up. All save Cadga, who looks around at the bloodstains and his missing companions.
Cadga: ....well, fuck.
*SMOOOSH!*
WINNER: TARRASQUE!
ROUND TWO: TARRASQUE vs THE SEX FIENDS OF EVERCREST
FIGHT!
A myriad of creatures clambers into the ring, struggling with their vaseline, porno mags, and bondage equipment.
Cassandra: (blinks)
Solstyce: WOAH! I'm used to different size issues, but this is waaaaaaay outta my league!
Mortious: Ugh! I'm not touching that thing! It's still....alive! Ewww!
Peachis: Now, come on...we may not like it...but we have to. SEX FIENDS ATTACK!
The Sex Fiends rush the Tarrasque and, in unified motions, begin humping its massive leg. The Tarrasque's eyes bug out.
Khyron: Look! He's lifting his tail! IT'S WORKING! IT'S WORKING! The beast is becoming aroused!
Lashanna: ....uh oh....
The Tarrasque crushes the horny little devils beneath its great tail.
WINNER: TARRASQUE!
FINAL ROUND: TARRASQUE vs THE OLD SCHOOLERS OF EVERCREST!
FIGHT!
A group of wizened old creatures struggle to climb in the ring.
Geeorn: Just a minute...just a minute, n00b. Phew! Gettin' into the ring was never this hard before!
Pesco: The years have taken their toll. Old Schooldom comes at a price, y'know...
Piper: AUGH! MY HIP!
The Tarrasque paces relentlessly, waiting for its prey to enter the ring. In the end, only a skinny little elf wearing a green nightgown and holding a stick makes it in.
Drysart: I may not be the best of fighters...but I know how to remove creatures like you from my boards!
Drysart lifts the ban stick.
Drysart: Ban Stick! ATTA-....is that pie?
Pesco: Argh! No, you fool! That's my cane!
Drysart: It sure looks like a pie...I bet I could take a nice big bite outta-
The Tarrasque leans down and quickly cleaves Drysart in two.
WINNER: THE TARRASQUE!
The beast rears up and roars in victory!
Karnaj: This is a dark day for EverCrest. Once again, we have fallen to great onslaught of the beasts of the Monstrous Manual. We can only hope that someday in the near future, we can-
Suddenly, the sound of boots marching and obnoxious accents are heard. A small horde of moustached men wearing berets and weilding weapons enters the arena!
Karnaj: OH MY GOD! IT'S THE FRENCH! THEY'VE COME TO TAKE OVER EVERCREST!
Frenchman: Oh ho ho! Oui! Vee have come to overrun your peeteefool leettle fights with our OUTRRRRRRRRAGEOUS ACCENTS!
Karnaj: Dear Lord, when will the carnage end?! How can we get out of this one?! Will the EverCresters wake up?!! Will the Tarrasque relent?!?! WILL THEY?!?!
To be continued...
quote:
Kameks had this to say about Punky Brewster:
You get the ofical title of ASSHEAD! Wear it proudly ya dumbass
Nah, I just hate you. Nothing personal, really...or, well, I guess it is. Oh well.
Yes, that's right, hot live sex!
quote:
WaisztarrozBarrimas had this to say about Duck Tales:
Nah, I just hate you. Nothing personal, really...or, well, I guess it is. Oh well.
Yes yes you hate me thats nice but if your gonna be a dumbass at least be a dumbass in tells lets not forget about the Bear pm shall we asshead.
Sig pic done with Microsoft paint, Work that doobie Pikachu.
quote:
Mortious Shadowstalker had this to say about Duck Tales:
Pesco's an old skooler?
I was wondering the same thing. I'm more old skool than pesco. Oh well, guess it's the attitude!
Ozius
This does not bode well... must be the rest of our turns soon... 
ur ghey.
Yes, that's right, hot live sex!At least I went out doing what I do best here: asking questions!
Ozius
quote:
Kameks had this to say about (_|_):
at least be a dumbass in tells
Eh, I decided that'd require too much energy, so I'll just keep on with how I do it. [ 12-27-2001: Message edited by: WaisztarrozBarrimas ]
Yes, that's right, hot live sex!
awwww I didn't get killed... wait this is a good thing *stays hiden*
quote:
WaisztarrozBarrimas had this to say about Jimmy Carter:
Eh, I decided that'd require too much energy, so I'll just keep on with how I do it.
Like i said its just text on a screen youd have to be insane to get worked up over it.Sig pic done with Microsoft paint, Work that doobie Pikachu.
That was eht funee
--Satan, quoted by John Milton
/point grease spots
/laugh grease spots
quote:
Bloodsage stumbled drunkenly to the keyboard and typed:
Bravo, Parcelan!That was eht funee
Yet, he is not done! There is still more funee to be found. Tune in next time... as the sun rises!
you go guys and gals, you can beat it!
just remember its all in the knees!
quote:
Suchii wrote this stupid crap:
No male has beaten me yet!
In-cor-rect! I ripped off your crotch, and you did nothing. Therefore, admitting defeat.
I win!
quote:You are posting here, so your are a part of EC, M'lady.
Aanile had this to say about pies:
=( I'm not apart of EC...awwww I didn't get killed... wait this is a good thing *stays hiden*
Don't worry. I'm going to probably die anyways, but at least I can go out in style... or something.
Goes off the find Lazuli and Hyacinth.
quote:
Mortious Shadowstalker wrote this stupid crap:
In-cor-rect! I ripped off your crotch, and you did nothing. Therefore, admitting defeat.I win!
wtf?
Neener.
quote:
And I was all like 'Oh yeah?' and Suchii was all like:
After I am done with this freak, I am coming after you!
Don't encourage him.
For Queen Elarin
And I'm not particuarly sure the French can help us much here. Deadly accents can only go so far against near-omnipotent power.
In the beginning the Universe was created.Douglas Adams, 1952-2001
I just know we could!
Charges at the Tarrasque, epic pet in tow
Well. That was a rather interesting experience.
Goes to put Lyinar's remains in the bioreactor to heal, then comes back
Watch...I'm going to go out talking the thing to death. It'll get bored to death and fall on me or something.
sigpic courtesy of This Guy, original modified by me
Lyinar Ka`Bael, Piney Fresh Druidess - Luclin
Get my drift?
quote:
Mr. Parcelan stumbled drunkenly to the keyboard and typed:
*snip* Mugsy da Bugbear *snip*
eep...
OOC: Well.. sigh. {i]Polishes her almost-potential-shtick, and mourns the fact it will never come to light.[/i]
See, I *could* have been an old schooler, but, well, I didn't hang around much (i.e. lurked) for the first year or so of my membership. The rest, I don't apply for. Oh, well.
Huggles Parce for making her laugh today. Thanks, Parce. I appreciate it.
*and up.*
*and up.*
Eep.
