It's tough to get women when they aren't really checking you out.
And don't say confidence, because I know that. Unless that's the ONLY answer. [ 10-30-2003: Message edited by: Lenlalron Flameblaster ]
Edit: Damn, beaten to the money comment. [ 10-30-2003: Message edited by: Shazorx / Modrakien ]
Not that I would know anything about being an unattractive guy looking for love, of course! 
I've got enough respect for you to not do that. I honestly don't have much advice for you, but Squier has a good idea. You need to be more active about asking girls. [ 10-30-2003: Message edited by: Falaanla Marr ]
[ 10-30-2003: Message edited by: Lenlalron Flameblaster ]
quote:
Lenlalron Flameblaster had this to say about Punky Brewster:
I believe in that; however, it's hard to tell if I'm just swinging at balls that don't exist.
The beauty of the law of averages is that, no matter how many times you "swing at a ball that doesn't exist", you never strike out. You get to stay at bat as long as you need, and then run like hell when you get a hit.
Ugh, baseball analogies. 
They already love you.
quote:
We were all impressed when Mightion Defensor wrote:
One way is to fall in love with them over phone calls and playing an online computer game with them. Then, by the time they've seen you, or get to meet you, it will be too late.They already love you.
Online/long distance relationships are also notoriously difficult to maintain. [ 10-30-2003: Message edited by: Suddar ]
2) find an ugly chick. She's your new best friend. Make sure never to show interest and to just treat her like one of the boys.
3) get introduced to the ugly chick's good looking friends.
4) there will come a time, sometime, eventually that you're hanging out with th ugly chick's friends, and it will be appropriate to mention that you just love eating pussy. Do this.
5) women love a man that goes down on them, and most women don't get enough. The good looking chicks will before long be interested in taking you for a test ride, so try not to disappoint.
6) read up on technique before hand and then lick her womanhood until she's dripping all over your face, and screaming for you to stop because it's too sensitive.
7) cuddle.
8) initiate another ronud of #6, and add a "I want to be inside of you baby" about halfway through.
9) fuck the everloving life out of her
10) wait for her to tell her friends. They'll do the work for you.
No, Really. Bite me.
quote:
And I was all like 'Oh yeah?' and Liam was all like:
Yeah, dont try that Len.
Yeah, uh, half of those go against what I believe in.
quote:
This insanity brought to you by Lenlalron Flameblaster:
How do not-so-attractive guys get chicks? Do they have to counterbalance all the the lack of looks with an extremely outgoing and lovable personality to draw women in?
It's tough to get women when they aren't really checking you out.And don't say confidence, because I know that. Unless that's the ONLY answer.
Unless you are hideous, that shouldnÂ’t be too much of a problem. From what IÂ’ve seen, appearance, unless you are one extreme or the other, isnÂ’t the largest factor in finding woman.
How you dress does help a lot. Get a girl or a gay guy to dress you up nice. They will know how to make you look "good" better than you. Vertical or horizontal stripes to make you look bigger or smaller, whatever. It's their thing.
No matter what anyone says, people will treat you differently depending on how you dress. Even if the style your friends chose is totally different than what you normally wear (from torn jeans to khakis and a button down, for example), give it a try. Iron your stuff, too. If you donÂ’t like ironing, toss it in the dryer for 20 minutes or put them out while you take a hot shower so the steam from the shower will help.
Also remember that it's not the woman's job to find the man, it's the man's job to find the woman. How a man acts, from what I've seen, greatly affects a woman's view of his attractiveness. Besides, a woman isn't going to go up to you; you have to go up to her. Strike out a few times if you have to. It's all about learning. Most women seem to like a man that's in charge. I guess they like power, or more accurately, their perception of what they think power is.
A woman's perception of power is somewhat skewed. They often confuse aggressiveness or arrogance for strength, even if the person is a coward and weak. As smart as some of them are in some senses, they are also very gullible in others. This aggravates me because I get annoyed when I see woman falling for obvious lies, but most just don't get it. The less you care, the easier it is, it's a simple rule. One big reason for this is the confidence thing, because you aren't worried about failing because you donÂ’t care as much.
Smell is also very important to women. I guess they have a better sense of smell than us, or something, but that means shower a lot, do your damn laundry on time. Use deodorant.
If you are a little scummy, listen to burgerÂ’s post. It will probably work, and women tend to have a gossip network. Other scummy tactics include talking to the fat chick to get the hot chicks jealous, and the like. An other popular scummy tactics is keep on fishing until you get a bite. The more maniplualtive and cold harted, the more sucessful you will be.
Then again, I'm currently single (and no, I don't use any of the "scummy" tactics. I'm still an old fashioned fool.) As I said before, listening to relationship advice from a single guy is like getting weight loss advice from a fat guy, so take my advice however you wish. [ 10-30-2003: Message edited by: diadem ]
This isn't the case for me, of course, since nothing could be better looking than I am.
I'm a traveler of both time and space!
quote:
When the babel fish was in place, it was apparent Doomie said:
I'm an ugly ugly man
quote:
Lenlalron Flameblaster thought about the meaning of life:
How do not-so-attractive guys get chicks? Do they have to counterbalance all the the lack of looks with an extremely outgoing and lovable personality to draw women in?
It's tough to get women when they aren't really checking you out.And don't say confidence, because I know that. Unless that's the ONLY answer.
First thing you need to accept: you will get rejected, probably often.
Dating isn't an easy thing, especially in this day & age, girls have a bajillion reason to say no, and you just need to get used to asking, taking rejection in stride and moving along to the next potential GF.
Confidence aside, just do the common sense stuff, dress reasonably nice, keep groomed and whatnot. Unless you're like deformed, attractiveness wont be much of a factor.
But also make sure you're asking out women within your attractiveness range, if you're a 6, dont ask out girls that are 9's, it'll help in your chances.
quote:
Nobody really understood why Reynar wrote:
But also make sure you're asking out women within your attractiveness range, if you're a 6, dont ask out girls that are 9's, it'll help in your chances.
If you think you have a chance, go for it. I'm not going to make the obvious pun here, so a 5 and a 9 in appearance can go together quite well. It all depends on the woman and man personality wise. With pretty much anything, not just this, if you think you are going to fail you are dooming yourself. If you give it a chance, then you may succeed. [ 10-31-2003: Message edited by: diadem ]
quote:
Doomie had this to say about Matthew Broderick:
Personality, I'm an ugly ugly man, womens still like me.
you just shut up.
as for the situation, it does vary... see me, I like guys in glasses. I don't know why... it's just really really really hot ^_^.
Just gotta find a girl who likes you for you, not for who you're trying to be... that can never turn out right
Go out. Make a life for yourself. Develop interests that make you happy, and do them. Concentrate on making yourself a complete person before you try to hook up with any girl, attractive or not. You should be able to function as a single unit, happy, healthy, and content with your life, before you even think about a relationship.
Given the frequency these threads keep coming up, I don't believe you are a happy, healthy and content single person. And until you find out how you can be, you're going to be miserable whether you have a girl or not.
Lyinar Ka`Bael, Piney Fresh Druidess - Luclin
This is getting really fucking old. Seems like we get these damned "Waaaaah why don't girls like me" type threads once a month. Sometimes it goes through a month or so, sometimes three or four, but then it happens again. And it seems like it's the same people who start the threads (Len, especially). Everyone drags out their personal pet theories about why women don't want to touch some skanky, whiny little guy, nothing gets accomplished, some people feel sympathy, some people get pissed. Me, I'm starting to get tired of it. Yeah, I could put Len on ignore, but this is getting to be like Maradon's Necromancer whining from the past.
Yeah I could put Len on ignore (so those of you who will inevitably say "hey if you don't like it, that's what the ignore function is for"), but he actually has some constructive opinions now and then. But you put Lenlaron and women in a topic together and it's like he can't help SCRAPING HIS FINGERNAILS DOWN THE CHALKBOARD. Bloody hell!
sigpic courtesy of This Guy, original modified by me
Chill out, fruity tooty 
Yes, as he said, he could put Len on ignore. But he also does have a point that more than one person does this sort of thing. I know a certain holy paladin of light who doesn't listen to advice, either, yet still expects those around him to want to hear all about what's still wrong, when he doesn't bother to work at fixing it. Fal used to be the same way, too, but Fal has done a lot lately to change his life and I don't mind if he wants to talk about problems with me. He's shown that he really does want more than just to complain.
I'm all for venting, and getting things out. But when people just want to whine about how their life sucks so much, but they don't ever try to change it, well, I find myself less and less and less inclined to feel sorry as well.
Lyinar Ka`Bael, Piney Fresh Druidess - Luclin
1.) The more you let this determine your worth, the more it will elude you. Seriously, the best thing you can ever do is relax. People sense desperation. It reads in your mannerisms, and makes others nervous around you. Lead your life, do things you like, hang around people you don't mind, and for god's sake don't make this the determinant of how you judge even one single part of yourself.
2.) Don't be afraid to strike out. It will happen. Possibly, it will happen often. But you'll never know if the person will say yes or not... if you don't ASK them. Never make assumptions that the other person knows - people miss subtle signals all the time. Also never make assumptions about who is "above your league" - that's just silly. People operate on many levels, and if you have any depth whatsoever you can attract many people for many reasons.
3.) Be considerate, but also be yourself. Don't alter your behaviour for others, more than simple politeness would prescribe. Don't suddenly become Mr. Chivalrous, or create a new "dating" wardrobe, or anything of the like. People who may like you should be allowed to like you FOR you, and not what you can pretend to be.
4.) Be flattering to yourself. Seriously. Everyone has their merits - you need to show your own. This is not to say that you should change yourself into something different (see rule #3), but instead to say that you should emphasize the sides of yourself that are interesting to the person you're interested in. If she's a theatre major, let your interest in movies carry the conversation - it's similar, you can share experiences, and that's a good thing.
In the same vein, don't talk bad about yourself. You're not obligated to try and convince her that you suck, so you SHOULDN'T DO IT. Just because you've had that bad experience way back when, or you've developed a paralyzing fear of heights, or what have you, doesn't mean you should necessarily go immediately publicizing these facts. Let them wait until you've already established a rapport, and are drifting into deeper topics.
5.) Be direct. Don't mess around with "feeling out the situation" or "trying to create the perfect mood." A good mood works almost as well as a perfect one, a pleasant location will be just as nice as the optimum. And if you like the person, that's all the feelings you should need. Go ahead and ask - they might just be waiting on you to do so.
6.) Take rejection with grace. I don't know how many people have failed in this. If someone says no, MOVE ON. Don't obsess, don't become bitter over it. You liked them well enough before, you should like them still now, but you should also call off the pursuit. Become friends. Yes, FRIENDS. I know it's a terrible word in relationships, but please - you ought to be doing SOMETHING with these people anyway. Just... focus your romantic attentions elsewhere.
7.) Take chances. If you come up with a compliment, say it. If you have an opportunity to talk to her, take it. It may lead to awkward moments, but who cares? The reward for something done right is many times worth the risk. Besides, people often look favourably upon those who act decisively - so even if you mess up something, you'll potentially be appreciated for merely making the attempt.
8.) Have fun. I mean, isn't that the point of this? If you're not having fun, something's wrong. Don't aim for a "goal" above all else. Enjoy yourself first, and worry about "getting the girl" second. Besides, good moods are infectious.
=+=
Now get out there and be social! 
quote:
Ja'Deth Issar Ka'bael had this to say about John Romero:
GOD FUCKING DAMN IT!This is getting really fucking old. Seems like we get these damned "Waaaaah why don't girls like me" type threads once a month. Sometimes it goes through a month or so, sometimes three or four, but then it happens again. And it seems like it's the same people who start the threads (Len, especially). Everyone drags out their personal pet theories about why women don't want to touch some skanky, whiny little guy, nothing gets accomplished, some people feel sympathy, some people get pissed. Me, I'm starting to get tired of it. Yeah, I could put Len on ignore, but this is getting to be like Maradon's Necromancer whining from the past.
Yeah I could put Len on ignore (so those of you who will inevitably say "hey if you don't like it, that's what the ignore function is for"), but he actually has some constructive opinions now and then. But you put Lenlaron and women in a topic together and it's like he can't help SCRAPING HIS FINGERNAILS DOWN THE CHALKBOARD. Bloody hell!
The Rules
Before posting a reply, please ask yourself the following question: "Does my reply offer any advice or contribute positively to the conversation in any fashion?" If you can answer "yes" to this, then please reply. If you cannot, then please don't reply.
Bitching Babies: If you don't like a thread, simply vote it a "1" and do not reply. Everyone else has just as much right to post whatever they want as you do; that "right" ending where I, the admin, decide it stops. Pointing out how stupid or unfunny you feel a thread (or poster) is will result in pain, unless the thread (or poster) is intensely retarded (take your chances). Comments such as "Looks like you're about to be banned!" will probably backfire in a way you don't wish them to. [ 10-31-2003: Message edited by: Gork ]
quote:
We were all impressed when Ja'Deth Issar Ka'bael wrote:
GOD FUCKING DAMN IT!
~Sha-nip~
OMG#%!
You're supposed to offer CONSTRUCTIVE CRITICISM#@!%! Not to kick them in the balls when they're already down!@#
YUO HRUT MY FELEINGZ! Not really.
We have a Forum for that^@$!
Off to flameball with you! 
Me? Ignore your advice? Hah! Hardly! This makes the assumption that you know everything that's going on. I, in fact, read up on a lot and try to impliment it as best I can; and I've been doing so.
When was the last time I had a thread like this? Prom? Yeah, I probably took too long getting around to the point. But I TOOK YOUR ADVICE. I WENT. I FOUND OUT THAT I DID NOT LIKE IT AND I WENT HOME. THAT WAS EXACTLY WHAT WAS SAID IN THAT THREAD.
Hey, 1 point for me!
Compared to where I was a year ago, I'm like five hundred times farther where I was thanks to the calm, chill advice of the board.
I actually go out on dates. I actually am more social. I actually can talk to women (Although, you know, not as well as I'd *like*) instead of just, you know, having nothing to say.
So give me more fucking credit than that.
I have bad luck. I am trying to find the answers to questions I have, to a community that is so diverse they might have them.
I'm sure, you know, we love everything that comes from Lyinth's mouth.
If you'd like to settle this man to man, without your girlfriend or my 'posse', as you'd love to call my diverse group of friends, feel free to up the ante.
Otherwise, just keep your mouth shut.
Edit: The college advice thread doesn't count. And I did check, you know, the size of my bed, so, I get 1.5 points.
Edit 2: The last person who tried to deply a bunch of bombs also got obliterated; so, you know. [ 10-31-2003: Message edited by: Lenlalron Flameblaster ]
If you feel his problem is that he is focusing too much on the problem and worring about it, then offer some advice to help get it out of his system.
He asked a question for advice and we are giving it to him, as good or as poor as it may be.
It's a simple question asking for advice. I remember when someone would post about having a bad day or have a quick quesiton about life without someone yelling OMG ANGST at them. If you don't like the thread, give it a 1 and move on. If you have a problem, crap about it in flameball, but don't crap the thread here. [ 10-31-2003: Message edited by: diadem ]
