edit: About 20 million set aside for said sand box idea, 20 million in investments, and I'm sure the rest is off to zee tax man. Lechium fucked around with this message on 09-27-2006 at 11:30 PM.
1. QUIT MY JOB!
2. Hire someone to clean my apartment for me.
3. Invest the money conservatively and live from the interest.
I'd buy the same stuff I do now.
First thing's first. I'd pay off any of my family's outstanding debts and bitchslap them into not being retarded and getting any more of said debts.
Next I would hire a full-time caretaker for my mother, as well as a exercise/motivational coach to start getting her back into shape. This absolves me of any guilt I might feel when I leave home (finally).
After that, some travelling is in order. North Carolina, Tennessee, and Alaska would be my first few stops. The first to meet a wonderful woman I met at Dragon*con, the second to attend a wedding of two of the most awesome people I know, the third to visit my brother and his new wife at his new station, as well as to catch up with my niece and nephew.
After that, I'd come back to Utah to visit my father's grave and pay my proper respects, for I have not been able to do so since his funeral.
After that, I'm not sure where. I believe I could be rather happy near where I'm living right now (Better part of two decades here. Truly home to me), but I'd certainly work still, after going to school for my vocation.
I.. was going to say I won't go into detail, but I realize I already have, and nobody's reading this post anyway. So I'd go to school to be a Massage Therapist, then open a small practice nearby.
Then.. maybe I'd buy a PS3. But only if I had a million bucks extra.
Invest the rest and live comfortably.
1) Buy house close to the beach in either PB or La Jolla. Price cap at $3 million. I'd also pay off my current home.
2) Get that house wired and renovated all spiffily. This includes furnishings and high-end AV stuff.
3) Move into that house and renovate my current house and then rent it. I'd give all the details of maintnance to a rental management company.
4) Track down and buy a 2001 Camaro SS and get it repainted and tuned up if needed.
5) Buy an '05 or '06 Saleem Mustang.
6) Learn to drive stick.
7) Pick up a really nice car for weekend joyrides.
8) Distribute some wealth to friends and family. Mostly in the form of trust funds.
9) Donate a mil or two to Child's Play.
10) Invest the remaining 10 million or so in an 8-10% income fund and live off a paltry 800k-1mil per year income while taking whatever classes I wanted to and traveling wherever the fuck I wanted to.
500mph down on the deck 
I'm happy with what I do with my time, I enjoy school, I'm excited about my future jobs and generally wouldn't want things to change.
Clean out the literature, science and medicine sections of the co-op bookshop.
Landowner.
Then continue with my plans, except with the path smoothed out for me. Pvednes fucked around with this message on 09-28-2006 at 12:37 PM.
Not only is it a tax on ignorance of mathematics, getting all that money without the streetsmarts to deal with it effectively isn't a good thing. Not that I'd say no to 29 million dollars, don't get me wrong, it's just that it's a bad way to get rich.
Give a mil to my mom, dad and sister. Leaves 20 mil.
15 mil in investments via different sources (some in stocks, some in long-term savings accounts, some in vulture capital, etc). Leaves 5 mil.
Interest off the investments would be split 50/50.. Half re-invested, half going into my pocket. Maybe do a 75/25 if I actually have a large ROI.
The final 5 mil would be dumped into a 'standard' savings account with an occasional 100k being pulled into a checking account for easy access. I'd wind up buying a moderately nice place somewhere in Dallas (probably just a 250k house) and some computers to go with it.
And enough hardware to build 4 sentry guns to keep the rest of you fuckers away from my front door. 
I don't really have plans beyond that.
Oh, plus drugs and hookers.
quote:
Bent over the coffee table, Monica squealed:
Drugs and hookers.
I find your ideas intriguing and would like to subscribe to your newsletter.
--Satan, quoted by John Milton
YEY.
*grumble* Inheritance Tax *grumble*
quote:
Naimah stopped beating up furries long enough to write:
Are you taxed for dying yet?
quote:
Inheritance Tax
I guess from a certain point of view...
quote:
x--NightMareO-('-'Q) :
I'd create a life-size whitestar from Babylon 5. Use the command center to play games like Tachyon and Freespace, and get busy with the membari ladies.
NICOLE
quote:
Everyone wondered WTF when Falaanla Marr wrote:
Lump sum.20 million invested so I can live off of the interest.
1 million to build the house I want. In eastern NC, it wouldn't be that much for the land, leaving a ton for the actual house.
1 million to pay off my parents house, my grandpa's house, and all of their cars. Same thing for my two brothers. If they want, I'd buy each immediate family member + grandpa any car they wanted. Same for all their debt.
1 million to set up a scholarship fund at my school.
1 million to fund a franchise of some restaurant. not sure what that would cost.
5 million for random spending.
Cheap land 'cuz of the flooding and hurricanes.
I'd take the lump sum. Pay off my debt, my family's debt. Invest a large chunk. Buy my mom a sweet house and give her money to invest in her own business. Buy a house in Hawaii for my dad and stepmom to retire at. Buy Dethy his Winston. Set up a trust fund and college fund for Chase and future kidlets. Finish school. Buy a ranch in Colorado with a few nice cars. Live nicely. Jajahotep fucked around with this message on 09-30-2006 at 07:59 PM.
quote:
ACES! Another post by Maradon!:
Everybody knows wizard towers rely on telekinesis and/or teleporters.Or at least elevators.
The hardest part to swing is plumbing, so you're kinda stuck having to go to the ground floor to go to the bathroom. Other than that the cost should be only slightly higher than constructing a house out of the same material (obsidian)
Include one of those giant inflatable slides they have at state fairs. those'll get you downstairs in a flash.
quote:
Aurying:
Include one of those giant inflatable slides they have at state fairs. those'll get you downstairs in a flash.
Yes.
Anyway, lump sum.
1) Retain a lawyer. Not the ones you see on tv. God only knows what asshole would sue me for some asinine reason.
2) Hire an accountant. I'm very crappy when it comes to money.
3) Hire a PI and/or someone that can trace my family tree. Make sure I don't have any surprise visits from relatives that I never knew I had. Also no Anna Nicole Smith type of women.
4) If they do come knocking at my door, mandatory DNA testing.
5) Have a hobbit home built for me. Also have a sock drawer room for you know who.
6) New computers, and play AO 'til I puke.
7) Hire a maid and a cook.
8) If I have enough money, build a single screen movie theator, complete with a balcony. Make it 21+ only. It's going to be stocked with different types of beer.
9) Save the rest.
And from there I would plot to take over the world.
sigpic courtesy of This Guy, original modified by me
First, I'd have myself a Victorian manor. I'd make sure there were secret passages and two way mirrors and all that jazz.
I'd also buy a biplane and make sure I was taught how to fly it.
Really, I'd end up just wasting most of it, probably leaving a few million or a few hundred thousand left to invest. The rest would be decor, and mindless little trinkets and gadgets my heart is set on.
Also, I'd probably spend at least half secured hundreds of thousands of acres, to bribe folks and round up a hunting party in order to hunt the greatest beast: Man.
I may even pump 'em up with bionics like Steve Austin.
quote:
Kermitoving:
All you guys that want to learn to fly, you can do it for less than $10,000
IS THAT ALL!?
Well shit I'll just go LEARN TO FLY TWICE THEN!
quote:
ACES! Another post by Maradon!:
IS THAT ALL!?Well shit I'll just go LEARN TO FLY TWICE THEN!
BUT THAT'S $20,000!
quote:
NightMare had this to say about Captain Planet:
I'd create a life-size whitestar from Babylon 5. Use the command center to play games like Tachyon and Freespace, and get busy with the membari ladies.
Minbari.
