quote:
Niklas had this to say about pies:
He'll probably have all us insignificant people killed at the end.
More than likely.
Right on the dotted line, there, zach. Sign your death warrant.
A Mortious should only be used as an instrument of destruction.
quote:
Aury wrote, obviously thinking too hard:
AND the ZEPHY[/small]
I forgot we still had that, ahahupo.
Disclaimer: I'm just kidding, I love all living things.
The fastest draw in the Crest.
"The Internet is MY critical thinking course." -Maradon
"Gambling for the husband, an abortion for the wife and fireworks for the kids they chose to keep? Fuck you, Disneyland. The Pine Ridge Indian Reservation is the happiest place on Earth." -JooJooFlop
quote:
Mortious had this to say about the Spice Girls:
Finally, someone read the instructions on my label.A Mortious should only be used as an instrument of destruction.
And you got to sit on Kat.
Me, I have leezard smeared on my ass.
quote:
JooJooFlop stumbled drunkenly to the keyboard and typed:
And you got to sit on Kat.Me, I have leezard smeared on my ass.
heh heh heh...
sigpic courtesy of This Guy, original modified by me
Scene opens in a musty poker room in the basement an old warehouse. The air is thick with cigar smoke and stinks heavily of alcohol from the four men seated around a circular poker table. They deal out hands heavily, their eyes lazy and indicating no particular rush.
Sean: Warm today.
Liam: Was warm yesterday.
Skaw: Gonna be warmer tomorrow.
Callalron: ...yup.
Sean: Heard about that Drysart fella?
Liam: Got himself in trouble with the ladies again.
Skaw: Illegimate children. Five of 'em.
Callalron: ...yup.
Another hand is dealed as a fat prairie dog walks down the basement stairs, carrying a six-pack of beer with him. With a grunt, he hops up onto the table.
Sean: Prairie dog on the table.
Liam: They're good at poker.
Skaw: Ain't so good at gin, though.
Callalron: ...yup.
The prairie dog guzzles a bottle empty quickly, then smashes the bottle against Skaw's face in an explosion of blood and glass. He then bashes a full bottle on the back of Sean's head, causing him to topple over in his chair. With a coup de grace, he kicks his foot into Liam's teeth and pours a pint of beer on the man as he falls backwards.
Callalron: ...yup.
His beer gone and his business done in this room, the prairie dog hops off the table and walks up the stairs to continue his business elsewhere.
I wanna die amusingly too!
quote:
Niklas's fortune cookie read:
Call survived?
No one, and I mean *no one* fucks with Call. Remember how he made that Balrog his bitch in the EC vs MM ?
quote:
KaLourin was listening to Cher while typing:
No one, and I mean *no one* fucks with Call. Remember how he made that Balrog his bitch in the EC vs MM ?
Good point.. Call is a furious monkey killing machine when angered! [ 11-08-2003: Message edited by: Niklas ]
quote:
A sleep deprived Niklas stammered:
Good point.. Call is a furious monkey killing machine when angered!
Can't remember the last time Call got outright pissed about something. It's one of those "the skies turn the color of blood, the seas boil, and the birds and beasts of the Earth scream in pain and terror" type events.
sigpic courtesy of This Guy, original modified by me
sigpic courtesy of This Guy, original modified by me
Scene opens in a laboratory as an elf wearing shades busily works over a table filled with gadgets, knick-knacks and chemicals. Suddenly, his eyes light up and a broad smile comes across his face as he jumps from his table holding a large blueprint. Another elf, this one a red-headed female, comes down the laboratory stairs.
Ja'Deth: Lyinar! Lyinar, my dear, come quickly!
Lyinar: What it is, sweetheart?
Ja'Deth: After so many years of research...of experimentation...I have finally created it!
Lyinar: It? You mean?
Ja'Deth: Yes! I have discovered, simultaneously, the cure for the common cold, cancer and AIDS! And not only that, I have discovered how to convert the diseases into food for the homeless!
Lyinar: Oh, Deth! I'm so proud of you!
The two elves embrace lovingly, while a tiny prairie dog wearing a utility belt around his pudgy waist walks into the laboratory and stands next to the two lovebirds. Suddenly, the blueprints fall from Ja'Deth's grasp and land on the floor.
Ja'Deth: Oh, goodness! I seem to have dropped it...let me just bend down and get it...
Ja'Deth bends over and quickly goes into a violent, seizure-like convulsion as the prairie dog stabs a high-powered taser into his neck.
Lyinar: Ja'Deth? Are you feeling alright?
Ja'Deth: kkxkxkxkxkxxkxxxxjjjjj....*drool*
Lyinar: You should probably eat more fibe-xxxkxocbnca
Lyinar collapses face-forward in a vicious convulsion as the prairie dog jerks his taser free from her leg and replaces it in his utility belt.
As the two elves lay on the ground, twitching in pools of their own frothy drool, the prairie dog hikes up his belt and continues on his busy quest.
Maybe those were plans for a Voltswagon? Still a project he should charge ahead with.
[ 11-08-2003: Message edited by: Lyinar Ka`Bael ]
Lyinar Ka`Bael, Piney Fresh Druidess - Luclin
quote:
Mightion Defensor had this to say about (_|_):
I wondered watt would be coming next, but it was still quite shocking.Maybe those were plans for a Voltswagon? Still a project he should charge ahead with.
Those puns gave me quite a jolt. But I think you've just made yourself a glowing target to be plugged into Parcelan's next story, wherein you will be...um...electrocuted to death by one of those giant lightning guns from the Matrix.
...
Er, as a figure of speech.
What can I say, your puns fried my brain. I couldn't even hold an electrical candle to that.
Disclaimer: I'm just kidding, I love all living things.
The fastest draw in the Crest.
"The Internet is MY critical thinking course." -Maradon
"Gambling for the husband, an abortion for the wife and fireworks for the kids they chose to keep? Fuck you, Disneyland. The Pine Ridge Indian Reservation is the happiest place on Earth." -JooJooFlop
Scene opens up in a crowded disco. Lights blaze and music blares as people dance the night away. A pair of saucy Texans, one tall and one short, approach the DJ: a little ferret spinning some records.
Bajah: Say there, DJ, those are some mad tunes you're cranking out there.
Timpofee: An audio orgasm! My ears are jizzing!
Ferret: Thanks, fellas. Hey, recommend me to your friends!
Bajah: Definitely. You need to come to my New Year's bash; it's going to be insane!
Timpofee: A social fuckfest! My reputation blew its load!
As they all share a good laugh, a portly prairie dog sporting a fluffy black afro rises up from behind the record stand and silently observes.
Bajah: So, DJ, what's your favorite spin?
Ferret: Well, I'm very fond of rap, naturally, and I've always wanted to get into countryyyyyAAAAAAAAARGH!
The DJ's screams are mixed with a terrible bumping sound as the prairie dog slams his face into a spinning record. As it drags Ferret into a disturbing round of being crushed against the music, Bajah raises an eyebrow.
Bajah: I'm not quite sure what I think of this new track. The screams are kind of catchy...
The new music is mixed with several crunching sounds as the prairie dog slams vinyl after vinyl over Bajah's head before the Texan collapses in a pile of record shards.
Timpofee: A Caligulan ORGY of violence! My bloodlust is cumming so much it could fill an Olympic swimming p-
His metaphors are cut short as the prairie dog replaces Timpofee's head with a disco ball, causing him to fall backwards ontop of his companion.
The prairie dog takes a brief moment to comb his afro, then jumps over the DJ booth and exits, eager to continue his mission.
To Be Continued [ 11-08-2003: Message edited by: Mr. Parcelan ]
And in a Disco, too! Aaaaaugh!
No, Really. Bite me.
