I was in the Virgin Islands once. I met a girl, we ate lobster, drank piƱa coladas. At sunset, we made love like sea otters. That was a pretty good day. Why couldn't I get that day over, and over?
I don't know how to be sexy. If I catch a girl looking at me and our eyes lock, I panic and open mine wider. Then I lick my lips and rub my genitals. And mouth the words "You're dead."