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Topic: Let the bodies hit the...
Karnaj
Road Warrior Queef
posted 07-24-2007 04:18:52 PM
FLOOOOOOOOOOOOOOORRRRRR

This video is a decent idea, but the editing job on it kinda sucks, so don't feel like you have to watch the whole thing. What's funniest about it, as with AOL news articles, are the comments beneath it.

That's the American Dream: to make your life into something you can sell. - Chuck Palahniuk, Haunted

Under capitalism, man exploits man. Under communism, it's just the opposite. - John Kenneth Galbraith



Beer.

Elvish Crack Piper
Murder is justified so long as people believe in something different than you do
posted 07-24-2007 06:12:23 PM
Why, we he actually touches them, does he always go for the lymph nodes by the persons top of neck?

Not that pentecostals aren't weird in the first place, but damn thats freaky. How the hell does that constitute a religious service?

Elvish Crack Piper fucked around with this message on 07-24-2007 at 06:13 PM.

(Insert Funny Phrase Here)
Azakias
Never wore the pants, thus still wields the power of unused (_|_)
posted 07-24-2007 06:33:04 PM
I find it funny how people claim to have the same healing powers that Jesus supposedly possessed.

Isnt that some sort of sacrilage?

"Age by age have men stood up and said to the world, 'From what has come before me, I was forged, but I am new and greater than my forebears.' And so each man walks the world in ruin, abandoned and untried. Less than the whole of his being"
Blindy.
Suicide (Also: Gay.)
posted 07-24-2007 07:43:03 PM
quote:
Azakias's opinion of themself must be pretty good:
I find it funny how people claim to have the same healing powers that Jesus supposedly possessed.

Isnt that some sort of sacrilage?


Yes.

Callalron
Hires people with hooks
posted 07-24-2007 08:24:38 PM
Imitation is the sincerest form of scarilage.

Callalron fucked around with this message on 07-24-2007 at 08:24 PM.

Callalron
"When mankind finally discovers the center of the universe, a lot of people are going to be upset that it isn't them."
"If you give a man a fish he'll eat for a day. If you teach a man to fish he'll just go out and buy an ugly hat. But if you talk to a starving man about fish, then you've become a consultant."--Dogbert
Arvek, 41 Bounty Hunter
Vrook Lamar server
Steven Steve
posted 07-24-2007 08:28:35 PM
But it's still scralage nonetheless
"Absolutely NOTHING [will stop me from buying Diablo III]. I will buy it regardless of what they do."
- Grawbad, Battle.net forums

"Don't want to sound like a fanboy, but I am with you. I'll buy it for sure, it's just a matter of for how long I will be playing it..."
- Silvast, Battle.net forums

Karnaj
Road Warrior Queef
posted 07-24-2007 08:31:22 PM
There's a little Italian deli just down the street that makes a great scralaggio.
That's the American Dream: to make your life into something you can sell. - Chuck Palahniuk, Haunted

Under capitalism, man exploits man. Under communism, it's just the opposite. - John Kenneth Galbraith



Beer.

Vorago
A completely different kind of Buckethead
posted 07-25-2007 11:32:18 AM
Anakha's Wii
Pancake
posted 07-25-2007 12:22:33 PM
He doesn't even touch most of the people. Why are they all spasming like they are having a seizure?
"From the depths of my parent's basement, thy has truly struck a blow for nonconformity."
Karnaj
Road Warrior Queef
posted 07-25-2007 12:33:00 PM
quote:
Anakha's Wii screamed this from the crapper:
He doesn't even touch most of the people. Why are they all spasming like they are having a seizure?

There are a couple of reasons. One is that they are so stalwartly convinced that they're going to get a dose of God's Godly Goodness, that they actually start exhibiting physical symptoms of this. Quite literally, mind over matter. Of course, they wouldn't know exactly what to do, so they behave in this specific manner because that's what they see other people doing, or that's what they've done in the past.

It's probably a subconscious thing, too. They don't necessarily have to think about shaking or falling down, but they've been conditioned to do it. Think of handshaking; if you had no idea what handshaking was and had never seen it, what would you do if someone just stuck his hand out at you? But since you know what's expected over you, you automatically shake a person's outstretched hand.

Of course, the final reason is that they're crazy.

That's the American Dream: to make your life into something you can sell. - Chuck Palahniuk, Haunted

Under capitalism, man exploits man. Under communism, it's just the opposite. - John Kenneth Galbraith



Beer.

Goma
Pancake
posted 07-25-2007 12:40:10 PM
Seeing that video makes me both embarassed for and frightened by the human race.
Blindy.
Suicide (Also: Gay.)
posted 07-25-2007 12:49:43 PM
quote:
I gotta give it to Goma with:
Seeing that video makes me both embarassed for and frightened by the human race.

Shouldn't you be embarrassed by and frightened for? Assuming that you are, in fact, human...

BOT.

Falaanla Marr
I AM HOT CHIX
posted 07-25-2007 02:56:55 PM
I went to a church once that a friend asked me to go to. I saw this going on.

I got up and left. That was scary.

Cherveny
Papaya
posted 07-25-2007 04:35:56 PM
I liked the video response to it even better (it's a link right below the video itself). It takes the same video, and set's it to the Benny Hill theme.
Maradon!
posted 07-25-2007 07:13:58 PM
quote:
Anakha's Wiiing:
He doesn't even touch most of the people. Why are they all spasming like they are having a seizure?

Because they were paid money to do so.

Faith healers work one of two ways: the first is to pay people to act healed. This is done sparingly, but Mr. Hinn here likes to do groups at a time so it's more impressive.

The second way works on anybody, but it's a lot more tricky. First, before what the faith healer calls a sermon and I call a performance even starts, aides require all attendees to fill out a "prayer card" that details all their ailments, along with their names and usually their ages and seat number.

The "healer" wears an earpiece, either discreetly or obfuscated by a mic, though which aides tell him who to heal of what ailment and what seat they're in. Healer pulls a Johnny Carson Psychic act and magically knows who has what affliction!

The real magic, though, is how they enforce compliance: there are three forces at work making sure nobody blows the act. First is genuine faith. A great many people that attend these things are so blindly faithful that they sincerely believe they have been healed, even to the point of discontinuing real medical treatment. For this reason, faith healers generally prey on the elderly or people belonging to other notably susceptible demographics (like blacks).

The second force is social pressure. Even if you're someone on the fence about the whole faith healing deal, you're probably still extremely religious just by virtue of being there, and you really wouldn't want to appear blasphemous or inappropriate in such an enthusiastic crowd. So if you get faith healed, odds are good you'll drink the kool-aid like everyone else and act the part if only to keep from looking foolish.

The third force is physical violence. Faith healers go to great lengths to ensure that everybody they heal is either an actor or a zealot likely to play along. If they have any doubts, though, they will usually give their "healing" a little extra juice. As ECP observed, an easy way to do this is a good jab at the lymph nodes. Other ways include palming the recipients forehead and thrusting them to the ground hard enough to induce whiplash. After your healing, there's generally a group of dedicated "attendants" dressed in plain clothes. They stand around you, catch you as you fall back, and usher you away from the performance area and if necessary isolate any less-than-grateful comments, usually by shouting very loud as they prod you along so nobody around can hear anything you say. Even if you're a complete skeptic, there's no escape from being faith-healed.

At least, this is how Mr. Hinn did it when I saw him in pittsburgh in 2001. I was trying to score with a devout at the time, what can I say.

"How did you figure all this out from one visit, Maradon?" I hear you ask. The truth is that they really don't do much to conceal it. Selective admittance (you can't get in unless you are with a church or with someone who is) coupled with the above mentioned natural safeguards effectively weed out most skeptics, and everybody else is blinded by their faith. People called on are genuinely surprised that Hinn knows their affliction, as if they never filled out the mandatory prayer card.

Maradon!
posted 07-25-2007 07:19:17 PM
quote:
Over the mountain, in between the ups and downs, I ran into Goma who doth quote:
Seeing that video makes me both embarassed for and frightened by the human race.

These people are in no way representative of the human race at large.

Anakha's Wii
Pancake
posted 07-25-2007 07:22:00 PM
If i got stuck with that, i would totally write down that i had Extremely Drug Resistant Tuberculosis. Lets see them faith heal that.
"From the depths of my parent's basement, thy has truly struck a blow for nonconformity."
Maradon!
posted 07-25-2007 07:32:00 PM
quote:
Over the mountain, in between the ups and downs, I ran into Anakha's Wii who doth quote:
If i got stuck with that, i would totally write down that i had Extremely Drug Resistant Tuberculosis. Lets see them faith heal that.

They could always just not call on you to be healed (like they do with amputees and people with broken bones).

But yeah, if I recall I put down kaposi's sarcoma as my affliction

Karnaj
Road Warrior Queef
posted 07-25-2007 07:36:10 PM
Somewhat related to the whole faith-healing bullshit...

Derren Brown, an atheist and skeptic, claiming to be able to instantly convert people.

And Part 2 of the same. Make sure to read the notes on the right-hand site, it's a lengthy explanation of exactly what he's doing to get these reactions.

That's the American Dream: to make your life into something you can sell. - Chuck Palahniuk, Haunted

Under capitalism, man exploits man. Under communism, it's just the opposite. - John Kenneth Galbraith



Beer.

Kegwen
Sonyfag
posted 07-26-2007 01:36:04 AM
That's impressive
Blackened
posted 07-26-2007 02:05:39 AM
quote:
Kegwen.
That's impressive
You should take a few minutes (around 30, ) and check out some his other videos. He's a fantastic entertainer.

He's also getting a show on Sci Fi, if these YouTube comments are to be trusted. Debuts at 10 PM tonight. (26th)


Although my distaste for you as a human being is brobdingnagian,
what I'm about to do isn't personal.
Karnaj
Road Warrior Queef
posted 07-26-2007 01:09:21 PM
Oh, that's right. Well, at least we managed to swipe Derren Brown from the UK, though I would've preferred Top Gear.
That's the American Dream: to make your life into something you can sell. - Chuck Palahniuk, Haunted

Under capitalism, man exploits man. Under communism, it's just the opposite. - John Kenneth Galbraith



Beer.

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