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Topic: Is there a list of Murphy's Laws for First Person Shooters?
Kennatsu
hu�mor 1. That which is intended to induce laughter or amusement: a writer skilled at crafting humor.
posted 07-16-2006 03:50:33 AM
If there is, I'd like to see them. If not, maybe you people have a few that you've run into.
Taeldian
Pancake
posted 07-17-2006 02:56:45 PM
If you pull out a grenade to kill someone around a corner, they WILL come around the corner and shoot you while you're holding the grenade.
Bloodsage
Heart Attack
posted 07-17-2006 03:09:32 PM
quote:
Bent over the coffee table, Taeldian squealed:
If you pull out a grenade to kill someone around a corner, it WILL bounce of the wall and land at your feet.

No, I'm not looking at you, G.R.A.W.

To reign is worth ambition, though in Hell:
Better to reign in Hell than serve in Heaven.

--Satan, quoted by John Milton

Karnaj
Road Warrior Queef
posted 07-17-2006 03:14:08 PM
quote:
Bloodsage put down Tada! magazine long enough to type:
No, I'm not looking at you, G.R.A.W.

Gawking Retards Agitate Wang?

That's the American Dream: to make your life into something you can sell. - Chuck Palahniuk, Haunted

Under capitalism, man exploits man. Under communism, it's just the opposite. - John Kenneth Galbraith



Beer.

Blindy.
Suicide (Also: Gay.)
posted 07-17-2006 03:15:17 PM
quote:
Karnaj's opinion of themself must be pretty good:
Gawking Retards Agitate Wang?

Why is it that every time you seen acronym, you assume it's something about cock or ass or cocks going into asses or perhaps bloody stool?

Bloodsage
Heart Attack
posted 07-17-2006 03:24:58 PM
quote:
Verily, the chocolate bunny rabbits doth run and play while Karnaj gently hums:
Gawking Retards Agitate Wang?

Going to Ram it All the Way

Bloodsage fucked around with this message on 07-17-2006 at 03:25 PM.

To reign is worth ambition, though in Hell:
Better to reign in Hell than serve in Heaven.

--Satan, quoted by John Milton

Karnaj
Road Warrior Queef
posted 07-17-2006 03:33:05 PM
quote:
And now, we sprinkle Blindy. liberally with Old Spice!
Why is it that every time you seen acronym, you assume it's something about cock or ass or cocks going into asses or perhaps bloody stool?

It was either that or "Wallabies," but I'm running on an anti-marsupial ticket this year.

That's the American Dream: to make your life into something you can sell. - Chuck Palahniuk, Haunted

Under capitalism, man exploits man. Under communism, it's just the opposite. - John Kenneth Galbraith



Beer.

Led
*kaboom*
posted 07-17-2006 04:50:44 PM
If you just ran back and got a full load of ammo, you will get run the fuck over by a tank you never saw.

If you are on a killing spree... you will run out of ammo, have to resort to stabbing people to death, and all their corpses will decay instantly, not letting you get more ammo. You will curse, cry, and then be run over by a tank.

Fuckin' tanks

Kennatsu
hu�mor 1. That which is intended to induce laughter or amusement: a writer skilled at crafting humor.
posted 07-17-2006 07:22:00 PM
When you're low on ammo, you'll find lots laying around on the ground... just none for your weapons.

When you're low on health and need to pour bullets into something...
a. your weapon jams
b. you need to reload
c. you completely run out of ammo

Your first attempt to cook a grenade results in you holding it too long.

Your next attempt at cooking a grenade results in the damn thing bouncing back at you!

El Cuchillo
RETARD! DO NOT FEED!
posted 07-17-2006 10:05:24 PM
quote:
Led had this to say about (_|_):
If you just ran back and got a full load of ammo, you will get run the fuck over by a tank you never saw.

If you are on a killing spree... you will run out of ammo, have to resort to stabbing people to death, and all their corpses will decay instantly, not letting you get more ammo. You will curse, cry, and then be run over by a tank.

Fuckin' tanks


Or in some cases, a friendly Enforcer.

Strip Club - Online Comic Reader and Archiver for Linux and Windows (and maybe OSX)
Steven Steve
posted 07-17-2006 10:34:18 PM
These are not very good laws. Here's the best, I'm telling you now:

Hog the weapons or die.

"Absolutely NOTHING [will stop me from buying Diablo III]. I will buy it regardless of what they do."
- Grawbad, Battle.net forums

"Don't want to sound like a fanboy, but I am with you. I'll buy it for sure, it's just a matter of for how long I will be playing it..."
- Silvast, Battle.net forums

Willias
Pancake
posted 07-17-2006 11:14:11 PM
quote:
Everyone wondered WTF when Led wrote:

If you are on a killing spree... you will run out of ammo, have to resort to stabbing people to death, and all their corpses will decay instantly, not letting you get more ammo. You will curse, cry, and then be run over by a tank.

But that's the best part of being on killing spree.

Getting people to flip the fuck out because you managed to stab their ass to death while they tried to cap you in the face with an automatic weapon.

I miss the days of EC ET.


Anyway, in multiplayer, if there is a static spot where medkits spawn, you're better off staying away from it. As soon as you pick it up, expect a few rockets to the face. You'll either be lower on health than you were before you grabbed the medkit, or respawn in a few seconds.

Anakha
my standards skyrocket when im on my keyboard heh
posted 07-17-2006 11:37:25 PM
quote:
I miss the days of EC ET.
"Buzz Beer, the beer of attainable women!"
"You try balancing a cow on the end of a fencepost to wield it like a club. Thats a physical damn challenge!"
"The only problem i have is too much aggro."
Mortious
Gluttonous Overlard
posted 07-18-2006 12:07:22 AM
quote:
Willias said:
I miss the days of EC ET.

Quoting dis.

Some people took it way too seriously and would scream and shout when they lost. Mostly Delphi, if I remember right.

Steven Steve
posted 07-18-2006 12:16:45 AM
I distinctly remember playing medic all the time, stabbing everyone to death, and being a general pain in the ass.
"Absolutely NOTHING [will stop me from buying Diablo III]. I will buy it regardless of what they do."
- Grawbad, Battle.net forums

"Don't want to sound like a fanboy, but I am with you. I'll buy it for sure, it's just a matter of for how long I will be playing it..."
- Silvast, Battle.net forums

Delphi Aegis
Delphi. That's right. The oracle. Ask me anything. Anything about your underwear.
posted 07-18-2006 12:45:27 AM
quote:
Mortious Model 2000 was programmed to say:
Quoting dis.

Some people took it way too seriously and would scream and shout when they lost. Mostly Delphi, if I remember right.


I tried to mellow out on that, but ho man, thos early days I'd get worked up over nothing. Heh.

Knife tickle-fights and the custom maps (The one where allies have to blow up the rocket was awesome, and the gold stealing one) were fun as hell.

Akiraiu Zenko
Is actually a giddy schoolgirl
posted 07-18-2006 01:25:47 AM
Ah, the joys of rifle grenades, and setting mines around the building materials. I loved playing an engy.
The artist formerly known as Zephyer Kyuukaze.
Skaw
posted 07-18-2006 01:39:03 AM
quote:
El Cuchillo had this to say about dark elf butts:
Or in some cases, a friendly Enforcer.

Mag Riders suck for running people over. Everything else is great still(fuck you, Prowlers.) But a full speed Mag will just dent a person and push them aside.

My contribution to the thread: You have the ability to revive people, shout out that you can revive so they shouldn't tap. As you approach thier fleshy lump of a rock body, they tap.

Skaw fucked around with this message on 07-18-2006 at 01:45 AM.

Batty
Doesn't Like You. Specifically you.
posted 07-18-2006 05:54:03 AM
quote:
Zephyer Kyuukaze impressed everyone with:
Ah, the joys of rifle grenades, and setting mines around the building materials. I loved playing an engy.

Sniping with rifle grenades ftw.

Willias
Pancake
posted 07-18-2006 11:01:32 AM
quote:
From the book of Zephyer Kyuukaze, chapter 3, verse 16:
Ah, the joys of rifle grenades, and setting mines around the building materials. I loved playing an engy.

I remember pissing off people as an engy because I'd be smart and be a little random with the position of the mines.

"lol i jump over mine" *psssst* "FUCK"

But yeah, rambo medic was awesome in ET. There was one time I managed to wipe out 5 out of 6 people on the Allied team by going adren and shooting them all in the face.

And then everyone left game after that.

Leftover Mog
No, the spelling errors are not intentional
posted 07-18-2006 11:08:15 AM
quote:
Willias attempted to be funny by writing:
I miss the days of EC ET.

Won't you be my friend

"I don't know that atheists should be considered as citizens, nor should they be considered patriots. This is one nation under God."
-- George Herbert Walker Bush

Vorago
A completely different kind of Buckethead
posted 07-18-2006 11:53:41 AM
-The one door you assume has nothing behind it always does.

-The best way to find ammo for a gun is to not have the gun

-Your foot is as vital to your health as your heart

(Too tired to come up with more than three )

Vorago fucked around with this message on 07-18-2006 at 11:54 AM.

Mortious
Gluttonous Overlard
posted 07-18-2006 12:44:53 PM
quote:
Willias said:
I remember pissing off people as an engy because I'd be smart and be a little random with the position of the mines.

"lol i jump over mine" *psssst* "FUCK"


I loved being an axis engineer on the fuel dump map, mining the compound area and rifle grenade sniping was fun as hell.

Kennatsu
hu�mor 1. That which is intended to induce laughter or amusement: a writer skilled at crafting humor.
posted 07-18-2006 04:22:16 PM
Maybe we should try and bring it back?


Murphy's Law- If something bad can happen, it will. (just modifying some of the rules that are posted already)

-Your weapons will fail you when you need them the most.
-You'll pull the pin on your grenade, but forget to throw it.
-You will lose that big bad weapon you just picked up... to a knife wielding maniac
-You will hop into a vehicle.... just as a rocket hits it.
-Just as you're about to snipe your target, you fall to a sniper's bullet
-If you don't get killed by anyone else for a long while, that means everyone else has left the game.
-If you go in as covert ops and disguised as the enemy, you will end up falling to your teammate's guns (sorry to the countless teammates I've killed in Halflife:Firearms and ET)

Willias
Pancake
posted 07-18-2006 04:35:45 PM
quote:
Kennatsu had this to say about Optimus Prime:
Maybe we should try and bring it back?

Nah, IMO it should stay gone.

Why? People will play on it for a week or two, then like all EC fads, stop playing on it.

I'm not sure why it always works out that way, but everytime an EC ET server was put up, people stopped playing on it after a couple of weeks.

Then again though, it did always start up some of the funnier flame wars here on the forums.

Edit: Oh, and instead of "Right before you snipe your target, you get sniped yourself" that should be more like "Don't snipe at the top of a hill, some fucker will come along and push you off of it."

Willias fucked around with this message on 07-18-2006 at 04:39 PM.

El Cuchillo
RETARD! DO NOT FEED!
posted 07-18-2006 07:07:31 PM
quote:
Skaw had this to say about dark elf butts:
Mag Riders suck for running people over. Everything else is great still(fuck you, Prowlers.) But a full speed Mag will just dent a person and push them aside.

My contribution to the thread: You have the ability to revive people, shout out that you can revive so they shouldn't tap. As you approach thier fleshy lump of a rock body, they tap.


I haven't played in over a year at this point, is anything shockingly different?

p.s. Led needs to respond to my post.

Strip Club - Online Comic Reader and Archiver for Linux and Windows (and maybe OSX)
Skaw
posted 07-18-2006 08:48:04 PM
Nothing really, they added a new vehicle, The Wasp. A Mosquito with no radar, but anti air missles. Basically the long-awaited answer to Reavers. Works kinda like the TR Striker.

Dunno if you know about the Deliverer variants.

Skaw fucked around with this message on 07-18-2006 at 08:49 PM.

Alidane
Urinary Tract Infection
posted 07-18-2006 09:12:00 PM
quote:
Skaw posted

Nothing really, they added a new vehicle, The Wasp. A Mosquito with no radar, but anti air missles. Basically the long-awaited answer to Reavers. Works kinda like the TR Striker.

Dunno if you know about the Deliverer variants.


The really scary part about the wasp is that fucking cannon, though.

p.s. my sub ran out and i kind of want to resub but don't really want to give soe money.

Nina
posted 07-19-2006 11:03:50 AM
p.p.s: it's free.
Alidane
Urinary Tract Infection
posted 07-19-2006 01:07:12 PM
quote:
Nina posted

p.p.s: it's free.


I have trouble having fun unless I've got all my toys. It's strange.

Falaanla Marr
I AM HOT CHIX
posted 07-19-2006 02:18:41 PM
I remember when MagRiders were 'FagRiders' because of how easy it was to run people over with them.

Was so fun for me and a buddy to run around -- me driving, him shooting. We'd just see how many people we could run over before we got blown up. Grand times!

Delphi Aegis
Delphi. That's right. The oracle. Ask me anything. Anything about your underwear.
posted 07-19-2006 03:55:14 PM
Re: Led says, "The car is ON FIRE!"
ArchAngel
Not a girl, never will be, no matter how much you may hear differently
posted 07-19-2006 06:02:44 PM
1. If you stand still, you will be shot.
2. If you run and jump around, you will be shot.
3. If you hide, you will be shot.
4. No matter how good you are, there's somebody better.
"What power would hell have if those imprisoned there could not dream of heaven?" -Dream, Sandman
"When the first living thing existed, I was there waiting. When the last living thing dies, my job will be finished. I'll put the chairs on the tables, turn out the lights, and lock the universe behind me as I leave." -Death, Sandman
"Things need not have happened to be true. Tales and dreams are the shadow truths that will endure when mere facts are dust and ashes, and forgot." Dream, Sandman
Full sigpic image
Steven Steve
posted 07-19-2006 06:32:55 PM
4 is basically a terrible way of saying that everything is based on luck.
"Absolutely NOTHING [will stop me from buying Diablo III]. I will buy it regardless of what they do."
- Grawbad, Battle.net forums

"Don't want to sound like a fanboy, but I am with you. I'll buy it for sure, it's just a matter of for how long I will be playing it..."
- Silvast, Battle.net forums

Ja'Deth Issar Ka'bael
I posted in a title changing thread.
posted 07-19-2006 06:32:58 PM
quote:
ArchAngel was naked while typing this:
4. No matter how good you are, there's somebody better.

And then you get shot.

Kinda reminds me of the black guy in Mummy Returns "I got shot in the Arse!"

Lyinar's sweetie and don't you forget it!*
"All those moments will be lost in time, like tears in rain. Time to die. -Roy Batty
*Also Lyinar's attack panda

sigpic courtesy of This Guy, original modified by me

Skaw
posted 07-19-2006 09:32:29 PM
quote:
Falaanla Marr probably says this to all the girls:
I remember when MagRiders were 'FagRiders' because of how easy it was to run people over with them.

Was so fun for me and a buddy to run around -- me driving, him shooting. We'd just see how many people we could run over before we got blown up. Grand times!


Yeah, I have better chances of killing someone through colliding with them on an ATV than a Mag now, unless they've taken damage and haven't healed up.

All other tanks trump the Mag Rider in everything except the whole going over water dealio.

Both Vanguard and Prowler have more armor and fire power, they buffed Anti Vehicular damage for no reason a few patches ago, so about 5-6 Striker/Pheonix shots and a Mag is done for, where as the Vanguard can take around 9-10. It only has slightly better armor than the Lightning, but the Lightning has superior manuevering. Hell, Lightning, Prowler, and Vanguard can also go from forward acceleration to reverse much better than the Mag Rider.

Not to mention, since Lightning, Prowler, and Vanguard have chainguns, they actually can take down BFRs incredibly fast compared to a Mag Rider. Anti Infantry weaponry goes through the shields causing structural damage, where as the Particle Cannon and Rail Gun can't. Strangely, like the Pulsar, the Particle Cannon is counted as anti infantry. The Pulsar can't penetrate shields unless in AP mode. But the Particle Cannon doesn't have an AP mode. It's lose.

Skaw fucked around with this message on 07-19-2006 at 09:44 PM.

Alidane
Urinary Tract Infection
posted 07-20-2006 02:50:04 AM
quote:
Skaw posted

but the Lightning has superior manuevering.

Not to mention, since Lightning, Prowler, and Vanguard have chainguns, they actually can take down BFRs incredibly fast compared to a Mag Rider. Anti Infantry weaponry goes through the shields causing structural damage, where as the Particle Cannon and Rail Gun can't. Strangely, like the Pulsar, the Particle Cannon is counted as anti infantry. The Pulsar can't penetrate shields unless in AP mode. But the Particle Cannon doesn't have an AP mode. It's lose.


You're retarded. Why the fuck would you ever reverse in a Mag? Hell, why the fuck would you do it in a Van? KEEP MOVING FORWARD. The only time you reverse is maybe in a standoff if you just need to back up a few feet, or in a friendly courtyard. You've got 0 turning radius anyway, just spin and hit the gas.

Neither the Vanguard nor the Prowler chainguns go through BFRs shields--the cap for that is 12mm (meaning Harasser, Marauder, and Lighting chainguns) and Turrets. Vanguard has a 20mm chaingun which alternates between barrels making it hard as fuck to aim with, and the Prowler 15mm does the same (although I think the ROF is higher, making it a little easier to use). All small arms penetrate BFR shields--this includes the Pulsar on both modes.

The PPA is a piece of shit. Stop using it. You're driving. That thing is a peashooter meant to assist on vehicles you're chasing down, but otherwise, you should probably not be pointed at the enemy anyway.

The Magrider, when crewed with decent players, will only die to a Prowler if it gets caught with its pants down and only die to a Vanguard if the vanny gunner is exceptional. Additionally, the tank can fucking strafe, and the gun is direct fire, making it incredibly easy to use effectively. It's got the best AA out of the three MBTs (your gunner should be able to hit Reavers on the wing--if he can't, he sucks), and last time I ran one, it's a goddamn killer against Flight BFRs as well.

What it sounds like is you're wanting to use the Magrider like you're seeing the NC and TR use their tanks. Stop that. It's an entirely different vehicle that needs to be handled more as a mobile AV sniping platform than anything. It's the most effective tank at distance, and has the speed to stay at a distance. Yea, Phoenixes are a bitch, and there ain't much you can do about them except retreat out of range, repair, and then follow the dots on your minimap to the AMS.

p.s. they're still fagriders.

Alidane fucked around with this message on 07-20-2006 at 02:56 AM.

Blindy.
Suicide (Also: Gay.)
posted 07-20-2006 03:55:41 PM
What game are you guys talking about?
Katrinity
Cookie Goddess!
posted 07-20-2006 04:03:01 PM
quote:
Blindy. Model 2000 was programmed to say:
What game are you guys talking about?

Planetside

Cookie Goddess Supreme
Furry Kitsune of Power!
Pouncer of the 12th degree!
"Cxularath ftombn gonoragh pv'iornw hqxoxon targh!"
Translated: "Sell your soul for a cookie?"
Kennatsu
hu�mor 1. That which is intended to induce laughter or amusement: a writer skilled at crafting humor.
posted 07-20-2006 06:22:30 PM
-You will find the weapon you need... when you don't need it anymore.
All times are US/Eastern
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