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Author
Topic: Evercrest vs. Final Fantasy!
Nicole
The hip-hop-happiest bunny in all of marshmallow woods
posted 09-24-2002 07:43:05 PM
I forget what exactly put this abomination in my head, but it's been rattling around in there for a while and won't come out. S'a little bit where the general freaks of EC go against the general freaks of FF. So without further ado...

Let's meet our combatants!

In the Evercrest corner...
Fizodeth!

Strengths:
- Whatever the hell his sigpic is could possibly scare something to death.
- Two words: Flamethrower Magnetism

Weaknesses:
- GNOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOME!
- When he gets within 50 feet of JooJooFlop, cutlery starts randomly levitating.

In the Final Fantasy corner...
Ifrit!

Strengths:
- Commands the devastating, soul-melting fires of hell.
- Old Skool powa gains muchas respectas.

Weaknesses:
- Due to weakness to cold and water, hasn't taken a bath in eons.

Have I desecrated this thing enough? Too bad. Time to

FIGHT!

A small gnome saddling himself with a gigantic flamethrower is seen in the EC corner, fiddling with straps and leaking napalm.

Suddenly, the torches flare brighter, dancing as if in homage, and the ground heaves and twists. A bright red spot grows on the ground, the stone shifting and melting, finally bursting free in a spray of lava and stone. Ifrit, dripping fire and roaring fury, rises from the depths, the fire dancing over his narrowed eyes, his strong, rugged features, his rather skimpy loincloth.

Zephyer: *dreamy sigh*

He raises on a dais of melting stone, narrowing his eyes at the chihuahagnome who finally managed to get his flamethrower on.

Ifrit: What the hell is this?! This is the last time I book out of Squaresoft...

Selphie: TellmeaboutitI'mstilltryingtogrowbreastsafterwhatKingdomHeartsdidtome.

Ifrit: Oh well, let's get this show on th-

Fizodeth: YAAAAAAAAA!

Breaking into a stumbling run, Fizodeth hefts his massive flamethrower and fires off a blazing trail at Ifrit.

Unfortunately, it seems he forgot something.

Ifrit: What the hell? I could karnaj hotter fire than this. In fact...

Ifrit bends over, his loincloth falling away, sending half the members of EC into convusions of horror, and proceeds to shoot out a mixture of fire, lavalike blood, and the charred skeletons of several lesser gnomes.

Zephyer: I can see his bon bons!

Unfortunately for Fizodeth, his bon bons are the last sight he sees as he's burned beyond tolerance and collapses in a pile of melted gnome and earrings.

WINNER: IFRIT!

Afterthoughts from the loser:

Fizodeth: And all this time I thought the whole "giant balls of magma" attacks were just him compensating for something... eesh...

Don't kill the Nicole!



I just spent
my last cent
purchasing this poverty.

Liam
Swims in Erotic Circles
posted 09-24-2002 07:45:10 PM
lololo
Karnaj
Road Warrior Queef
posted 09-24-2002 07:46:29 PM
I never knew Nicole was an alt for Parcelan! Spiffy!
That's the American Dream: to make your life into something you can sell. - Chuck Palahniuk, Haunted

Under capitalism, man exploits man. Under communism, it's just the opposite. - John Kenneth Galbraith



Beer.

Black
The Outlaw Torn
posted 09-24-2002 07:46:40 PM
Goodness gracious GREAT BALLS OF FIRE.

Not bad.



Time was never on my side.
So on I wait my whole lifetime.

Fizodeth
an unflattering title
posted 09-24-2002 07:47:17 PM
wahahahaha.
Akiraiu Zenko
Is actually a giddy schoolgirl
posted 09-24-2002 07:47:29 PM
BONBONS!

Ifrit is sexx0r

The artist formerly known as Zephyer Kyuukaze.
Tegadil
Queen of the Smoofs
posted 09-24-2002 07:48:51 PM
Yey for stories!
Palador ChibiDragon
Dismembered
posted 09-24-2002 07:50:50 PM
quote:
Zephyer had this to say about Captain Planet:
BONBONS!

Ifrit is sexx0r


I believe in the existance of magic, not because I have seen proof of its existance, but because I refuse to live in a world where it does not exist.
Trent
Smurfberry Moneyshot
posted 09-24-2002 07:51:34 PM
quote:
Zephyer: I can see his bon bons!

LOL

Alleria Qui'farush
Chica!
posted 09-24-2002 07:54:14 PM
Applauds.
Akiraiu Zenko
Is actually a giddy schoolgirl
posted 09-24-2002 07:54:18 PM
quote:
Palador ChibiDragon had this to say about Pirotess:


Murr.

The artist formerly known as Zephyer Kyuukaze.
Azrael Heavenblade
Damn Dirty Godmoder
posted 09-24-2002 07:58:31 PM
*Grins* Is this going to become a series? I hope so!
"The basic tool for manipulation of reality is the manipulation of words. If you can control the meaning of words, you can control the people who must use them." - Philip K. Dick
Janus.
I am not a woman
posted 09-24-2002 08:06:22 PM
Yah!
Densetsu
NOT DRYSART
posted 09-24-2002 08:08:23 PM
Lol, I liked it! MORE
I was in the Virgin Islands once. I met a girl, we ate lobster, drank piƱa coladas. At sunset, we made love like sea otters. That was a pretty good day. Why couldn't I get that day over, and over?
nem-x
posted 09-24-2002 08:14:40 PM
I can see his bon bons!

That reminded me of Ralph Wiggum for some reason, lol.

Tegadil
Queen of the Smoofs
posted 09-24-2002 08:15:46 PM
No Ralph, Jesus didn't have wheels.

1 is for 1337 spelling skillz!

[ 09-24-2002: Message edited by: Tegadil ]

Soldar
I'll take two of anything, please. To go.
posted 09-24-2002 08:20:09 PM
I support this.
Sentow, Maybe
Pancake
posted 09-24-2002 08:38:41 PM
I give thee a five! And the promise of more fives for future installments.
Once more into the breach, my friends, once more. We'll close the wall with our dead. In peace, nothing so becomes a man as modesty and humility, but when the blast of war blows in our ears, then imitate the action of the tiger, summon up the blood, disguise fair nature with rage and lend the eye a terrible aspect.
Sabratiz
Pancake
posted 09-24-2002 09:11:10 PM
I think that Shiva is sexier. What i would give to wrestle here. Haha dont i wish.
pain is temporary but pride is forever
Lyinar Ka`Bael
Are you looking at my pine tree again?
posted 09-24-2002 09:16:15 PM
More! More!

That was hilarious


Lyinar Ka`Bael, Piney Fresh Druidess - Luclin

lo-chan
Pancake
posted 09-24-2002 09:21:35 PM
Agh, my loyalties are divided

But great stuff nonetheless! ^^ (5)

[ 09-24-2002: Message edited by: Possessed Moogle Plushie! ]

Rodent King
Stabbed in the Eye
posted 09-24-2002 09:22:25 PM
Prarie dog Parce vs. Tonberry?
Mort vs. Steiner?
Suchii vs. Barret?
It ALL works!
My inner child is bigger than my outer adult.
Lyinar Ka`Bael
Are you looking at my pine tree again?
posted 09-24-2002 09:27:16 PM
quote:
Possessed Moogle Plushie! stumbled drunkenly to the keyboard and typed:
Agh, my loyalties are divided

But great stuff nonetheless! ^^ (5)


Bah!

Nicole > All

She truly has a gift for satire. You really should do something like Erma Bombeck does, Nicole. Her books are quite funny at times.


Lyinar Ka`Bael, Piney Fresh Druidess - Luclin

Vise the Stompy
Title now 100% ass free!
posted 09-24-2002 11:07:18 PM
quote:
Karnaj had this to say about Pirotess:
I never knew Nicole was an alt for Parcelan! Spiffy!
MorbId
Pancake
posted 09-24-2002 11:08:58 PM
The praire dog has some competition, I see.

[ 09-24-2002: Message edited by: MorbId ]

Ja'Deth Issar Ka'bael
I posted in a title changing thread.
posted 09-24-2002 11:24:26 PM
Great work, Sol. Do more! I'd like to see...I dunno. Kagrama vs Ramuh or something.
Lyinar's sweetie and don't you forget it!*
"All those moments will be lost in time, like tears in rain. Time to die. -Roy Batty
*Also Lyinar's attack panda

sigpic courtesy of This Guy, original modified by me

Taeldian
Pancake
posted 09-24-2002 11:27:24 PM
quote:
Ja'Deth Issar Ka'bael had this to say about Matthew Broderick:
Great work, Sol. Do more! I'd like to see...I dunno. Kagrama vs Ramuh or something.

OMGGGG!1111 the LIHGTIGN HURTZZZZ!1111

Nicole
The hip-hop-happiest bunny in all of marshmallow woods
posted 09-24-2002 11:27:42 PM
Already have the next match lined up, but not telling you who yet!

*bows and receives praise*



I just spent
my last cent
purchasing this poverty.

Ja'Deth Issar Ka'bael
I posted in a title changing thread.
posted 09-24-2002 11:35:24 PM
quote:
Taeldian spewed forth this undeniable truth:
OMGGGG!1111 the LIHGTIGN HURTZZZZ!1111

"lektreecity hrut braen!"

Lyinar's sweetie and don't you forget it!*
"All those moments will be lost in time, like tears in rain. Time to die. -Roy Batty
*Also Lyinar's attack panda

sigpic courtesy of This Guy, original modified by me

King Parcelan
Chicken of the Sea
posted 09-24-2002 11:41:35 PM
quote:
MorbId wrote this stupid crap:
The praire dog has some competition, I see.

I do?

Taeldian
Pancake
posted 09-24-2002 11:43:30 PM
quote:
MorbId thought about the meaning of life:
The praire dog has some competition, I see.

Someone says that every time someone posts anything funny and involving EC'rs.

Nicole
The hip-hop-happiest bunny in all of marshmallow woods
posted 09-24-2002 11:45:28 PM
Aw, and for a second there I felt special.


I just spent
my last cent
purchasing this poverty.

King Parcelan
Chicken of the Sea
posted 09-24-2002 11:45:40 PM
Filthy monopoly-busters.
Katrinity
Cookie Goddess!
posted 09-24-2002 11:46:59 PM
quote:
Humble Parcelan had this to say about Reading Rainbow:
I do?

Yes..from this chunk of cheddar cheeeeeese! <unleashes the awesome power of a platter of cheddar cheeeeeese on Parce!>

Cookie Goddess Supreme
Furry Kitsune of Power!
Pouncer of the 12th degree!
"Cxularath ftombn gonoragh pv'iornw hqxoxon targh!"
Translated: "Sell your soul for a cookie?"
King Parcelan
Chicken of the Sea
posted 09-24-2002 11:48:17 PM
I prefer Swiss, yo.
Mooj
Scorned Fanboy
posted 09-25-2002 12:05:06 AM
Behold, the power of cheese.
Lyinar Ka`Bael
Are you looking at my pine tree again?
posted 09-25-2002 01:07:28 AM
quote:
Taeldian had this to say about Cuba:
OMGGGG!1111 the LIHGTIGN HURTZZZZ!1111

ROFLMAO

Nicole is very special

[ 09-25-2002: Message edited by: Lyinar Ka`Bael ]


Lyinar Ka`Bael, Piney Fresh Druidess - Luclin

Vorbis
Vend-A-Goat
posted 09-26-2002 12:57:40 AM
Why is it that whenever someone makes a funny in a Parcelan manner they are instantly competition? Why can't they just be trying to emulate a style that seems pleasing? Why! Why for the haet?!

Parce should write some essays on his brand of satire and the process for making satire, and Bradsky agrees with me.

(Oh, fight was GUT!)

King Parcelan
Chicken of the Sea
posted 09-26-2002 01:00:59 AM
I doubt Nicole is trying to be competition. The more likely case is that she is merely inspired and wishes to share her own creativity.

Which there is nothing wrong with. I encourage it.

However, I must point out that these posts clearly violate the rules. As quoted:

quote:
NICOLE FUCKING SUCKS! BOO! BOO! NO POSTS!

So these must be forbidden in the future...

*cough*

Yeah

[ 09-26-2002: Message edited by: Humble Parcelan ]

Ja'Deth Issar Ka'bael
I posted in a title changing thread.
posted 09-26-2002 01:02:08 AM
dangit...I looked back here hoping for more. CURSE YOU VORBO FOR GETTING MY HOPES UP!
Lyinar's sweetie and don't you forget it!*
"All those moments will be lost in time, like tears in rain. Time to die. -Roy Batty
*Also Lyinar's attack panda

sigpic courtesy of This Guy, original modified by me

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