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Author
Topic: Romance novels
Lyinar Ka`Bael
Are you looking at my pine tree again?
posted 08-18-2002 01:44:10 PM
Do they have to include gratuitous, detailed sex scenes?

Or do you like them carnally challenged?

Cadga and I were talking about this just now in IRC with Goma.


Lyinar Ka`Bael, Piney Fresh Druidess - Luclin

Khyron
Hello, my mushy friend...
posted 08-18-2002 01:47:14 PM
I prefer them flaming.

As in, 'in a barrel, surrounded by homeless people who are thanking me for throwing that crap in.'

Those novels will burn for a good three hours each. And that's about all they're good for.

I hate romance novels.

Suddar
posted 08-18-2002 01:48:24 PM
quote:
Khyron had this to say about the Spice Girls:
I prefer them flaming.

As in, 'in a barrel, surrounded by homeless people who are thanking me for throwing that crap in.'

Those novels will burn for a good three hours each. And that's about all they're good for.

I hate romance novels.


you're rather bitter and mean.

Cadga
Quite Insane
posted 08-18-2002 01:49:17 PM
quote:
And I was all like 'Oh yeah?' and hard technology rock was all like:
you're rather bitter and mean.


hes trying not to masturbate.


and more sex the better! NEVER HAVE TOO MUCH SEX! heh

Professional Sinner/Heretic
My mindless dribble
Lyinar Ka`Bael
Are you looking at my pine tree again?
posted 08-18-2002 01:51:24 PM
Why do you hate romance novels?

For my part, I prefer the ones that don't have to be SEX SEX SEX every five seconds.

That's why I read Regencies. They very rarely include sexual references, because that sort of thing was frowned upon in Regency society. The only time they do include it is when the plot involves seduction, or marriage.

Think Jane Austen and you have the sort of stories I mean. They focus on the romance, and I love that about them.


Lyinar Ka`Bael, Piney Fresh Druidess - Luclin

G.S. Waisztarroz
Pancake
posted 08-18-2002 01:53:05 PM
I don't read a whole lot, and what I do read won't be wasted on romance novels.

Time better spent for Fantasy novels, heh.

Lyinar Ka`Bael
Are you looking at my pine tree again?
posted 08-18-2002 01:54:02 PM
What about them makes it a waste?

Flat characters? Bad plots?


Lyinar Ka`Bael, Piney Fresh Druidess - Luclin

Il Buono
You see, in this world there's two kinds of people, my friend.
posted 08-18-2002 01:54:28 PM
I've seen some lying around the house, I'm scared to touch them.

What the hell is with the titles of these things? They freak me out just looking at em.

"Those with loaded guns, and those who dig. You dig."
Tier the Genius™
Dark Elf Pimp
posted 08-18-2002 01:54:31 PM
I prefer stories of epic proportions and whatnot... I read more sci-fi and fantasy than smoochy romance stories.

Call it frustration, or anything, it's just not my style

G.S. Waisztarroz
Pancake
posted 08-18-2002 01:56:53 PM
To me, it would be a waste.

I'm just not into that sort of novel.

Lyinar Ka`Bael
Are you looking at my pine tree again?
posted 08-18-2002 01:57:32 PM
Actually with some of the longer romance novels, you can get that same sort of epic storyline. Many authors include political intrigue, mystery, murder, adventure and such in their stories.

Of course, usually you have to put up with the gratuitous sex scenes with absolutely no point to them, and so I usually steer clear of those.


Lyinar Ka`Bael, Piney Fresh Druidess - Luclin

Lyinar Ka`Bael
Are you looking at my pine tree again?
posted 08-18-2002 01:59:59 PM
quote:
G.S. Waisztarroz had this to say about pies:
To me, it would be a waste.

I'm just not into that sort of novel.


That doesn't stimulate discussion

What about them makes them a waste?


Lyinar Ka`Bael, Piney Fresh Druidess - Luclin

Suddar
posted 08-18-2002 02:01:57 PM
i'm more into realistic fantasy, like Perks of Being a Wallflower and books (somewhat) like it.

i was into fantasy a lot when i was younger, but i grew out of it. romance novels were never my thing, because sometimes, i just want a story and not a book about love, and i know romance novels usually have a nice story, too, but...sometimes it seems secondary, and sometimes it seems tacked on.

Timpofee
Mancake
posted 08-18-2002 02:05:34 PM
Actually on a dare in highschool i did a relevence test on 5 " romance novels"
oh man i wish i still had my report i got an A. But the teacher submitted it and it got published in some podunk newspaper.

" He slowly released his engorged manhood from the prison of his undergarments. She wrestled with the idea that something that massive could fit inside her BUT she was willing to give the man she loved, Ricardo the columbian poolboy, a chance to make her the woman she had always wanted to be..."

teehee
WOOP!
*cough*
Tim

<--- Evil. thats it

G.S. Waisztarroz
Pancake
posted 08-18-2002 02:05:43 PM
quote:
Lyinar Ka`Bael's fortune cookie read:
That doesn't stimulate discussion

What about them makes them a waste?


I get bored when I slow down to watch TV or read, so whatever it is I'm doing has to hold my attention well. The only way for that to work is if it's something I'm fairly interested in, like fantasy.

Plus I'm cold hearted.

Khyron
Hello, my mushy friend...
posted 08-18-2002 02:11:49 PM
Why do I hate them?

#1 - Friend of mine in school loved them. She was CONSTANTLY blabbing on and on and on about the latest series, she wouldn't shut up, bored me to hell, and then when a couple other female friends joined it... ugh.

#2 - The one she gave me was laem. I don't remember what the title was. I do remember that it had a plot worse than most porno movies I've seen.

#3 - It's really, really, really not my thing. I like three kinds of books/movies/games.

Action/Adventureish, Sci-Fi/Fantasy-ish, and comedy. It's very, very, very rare for me to find anything outside of those 3 that I like. (Except games, because I like puzzle games)

Lyinar Ka`Bael
Are you looking at my pine tree again?
posted 08-18-2002 02:17:57 PM
I think, hard technology, that you just haven't been exposed to good ones. A good romance incorporates all elements into a solid, entertaining story. Sometimes even the romance takes second place to what's going on in the plot.


Lyinar Ka`Bael, Piney Fresh Druidess - Luclin

Trent
Smurfberry Moneyshot
posted 08-18-2002 02:33:49 PM
I do not like romance novels.

They are predictable, boring and repetative, oh and sappy. Also what I have read of them, characters were not well protrayed, the plot was weak, and the sterotypes were plentiful.

Now, I'm sure there are wonderful epic well written romance out there, I'll just never read them.

I do not like sappy.

Lyinar Ka`Bael
Are you looking at my pine tree again?
posted 08-18-2002 02:49:04 PM
What romance novels have you read, Trent? Perhaps I could shed some light on the sorts of authors you've been exposed to.

Some of them out there are just, basically, pure trash.


Lyinar Ka`Bael, Piney Fresh Druidess - Luclin

Khyron
Hello, my mushy friend...
posted 08-18-2002 02:52:01 PM
They're not trash!

They make excellent kindling for starting fires.

Plus, they're even better in the bathroom! Stick one behind a leaky toilet! It'll absorb 500 times more water than any sponge out there! Plus, it's handy-dandy in case you run out of TP!

I REALLY dislike romance novels. They're not my thing. They're so not my thing, my thing mocks and ridicules them frequently.

To me, romance novels are like soap operas... only more se... well, not more sex... more viole... hrm, no more violence either... well, just more graphic since they can get away with it.

Trent
Smurfberry Moneyshot
posted 08-18-2002 02:53:07 PM
It was highschool, I don't recall the names of the books or the authors, but those books tainted forever my view on romance novels.

And, I really don't enjoy reading love stories, that is just my personal taste.

MadCat the 2nd
Pancake
posted 08-18-2002 02:55:12 PM
I hate romance novels of any kind with a passion - most of them are poorly written, have no plot, flat characters, and the author's only worry is how to get em to fuck like mad little rabbits by page 5.

I spend most my time reading sci-fi and generic 'adventure' like things. Think James Clavell, Tom Clancy, Dale Brown, Helen MacInnes, Clive Cussler - and Star Trek/Star Wars for my sci-fi goodness.

(I can seriously recommend Dale Brown if you're into high-tech airforce books, his books are absolutely great )

"Too often, we lose sight of life's simple pleasures. Remember, when someone annoys you it takes 42 muscles in your face to frown, but it only takes 4 muscles to extend your arm and bitch-slap that motherfucker upside the head."

ben(at)netmastering(dot)nl

Lyinar Ka`Bael
Are you looking at my pine tree again?
posted 08-18-2002 03:02:02 PM
Again, you too MadCat, haven't been exposed to the right ones.

I imagine you've probably only been forced into the presence of the mainstream or popular ones, and most of those do indeed suck. I assure you, however, that not every romance novel out there is only concerned with getting the characters to go out it like rabbits.

And I'm still not quite clear, Khyron, on what about them makes you hate them.

[ 08-18-2002: Message edited by: Lyinar Ka`Bael ]


Lyinar Ka`Bael, Piney Fresh Druidess - Luclin

Gikk
SCA babe!!!
posted 08-18-2002 03:03:03 PM
I like them.

I don't like the Zebra ones, cause they are, to be honest, STUPID. I like harliquin. They have a plot.

Historical is good, or modern, if they are written by a -good- author, like Jude Deveraux.

`Doc
Cold in an Alley
posted 08-18-2002 03:05:59 PM
I have no preference about whether romance novels should focus on sex or romance. I don't read them. I don't hate them, but they're not my cup of tea. From the standpoint of someone considering the concept of romance novels, I think there should be some of each, so that people can read whichever they like.
Base eight is just like base ten, really... if you're missing two fingers. - Tom Lehrer
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Please submit all questions, inquests, and/or inquiries, in triplicate, to the Department of Redundancy Department, Division for the Management of Division Management Divisions.

Lyinar Ka`Bael
Are you looking at my pine tree again?
posted 08-18-2002 03:08:44 PM
Harlequin has some rather entertaining plots at times. I've heard the Harlequin Intrigue is a very good series to get into. I myself like Harlequin Presents (I believe it was, been a while since I read anything Harlequin), and Harlequin Historicals.

My favorite duo in the Historicals has to be Liberty's Lady and Freedom Flame. Revolutionary War era, involving Libby and Meredith, sisters. Libby at one point is involved in a newspaper in Liberty's Lady, and Merry is a spy in Freedom Flame.

They both have good plots, firm characters, solid resolutions, and the romance is weaved in very nicely.

[ 08-18-2002: Message edited by: Lyinar Ka`Bael ]


Lyinar Ka`Bael, Piney Fresh Druidess - Luclin

Ja'Deth Issar Ka'bael
I posted in a title changing thread.
posted 08-18-2002 03:15:49 PM
My mother insists on reading ones that read like some bizarre cross between Gone With the Wind and the Psychic Friends Network. She tells me about them, how they're such great novels and such. Dunno if they suck or Mom just can't sell a book by telling what it's about, but you can pick out repetitive themes. The father is either a terrible villain of a man, or he was kind and generous and victimized by a female figure, the main character is a woman who's fighting to save something (her home, the soul of her long-deceased friend, her business, her sanity, whatever) and comes across a guy who wants to victimize her and another guy who she's secretly in love with who wants to save her.

You can kinda figure out what happens from there. Either she gets the guy she wants or there's some bittersweet end where they don't get together til the next book in the series.

So I stay away from romance novels. As for the sexual aspects, I can find porn on the net if I need to. When I'm in "romantic sex" mode, I find a different outlet.

Lyinar's sweetie and don't you forget it!*
"All those moments will be lost in time, like tears in rain. Time to die. -Roy Batty
*Also Lyinar's attack panda

sigpic courtesy of This Guy, original modified by me

Lyinar Ka`Bael
Are you looking at my pine tree again?
posted 08-18-2002 03:21:12 PM
I will introduce you to Regency romances, oh yes I will

I think you'll be pleasantly surprised.


Lyinar Ka`Bael, Piney Fresh Druidess - Luclin

Khyron
Hello, my mushy friend...
posted 08-18-2002 03:30:33 PM
What makes Khyron hate them :

I'd say the biggest reason is because I despise the stories.

Having an annoying friend go on, and on, and on about it was bad... but I gave one of her books a chance. My god, it was so mind-numbingly dull and stupid I couldn't get past the 50th page. The plot was crap, the characters sucked, and it pretty much followed every stupid stereotype of the genre I have heard about.

It totally lacked action (Not the sex kind, but any form of excitement) and seemed a monumental waste of time.

I've seen porno movies with better plots.

Plus, INT has a very big point with 'sappy'. I hate it. I want some form of action. I want conflict and adventure. I want something that won't drive me out of my mind with boredom.

Lyinar Ka`Bael
Are you looking at my pine tree again?
posted 08-18-2002 03:42:44 PM
You would definitely be more of the sort that likes the romance novels centering around adventure and intrigue then, Khyron.

Seems more the modern would be your type, something like Harlequin Intrigue, perhaps.

One of my Regencies recently involved the man and woman solving a mystery of a lord who was kidnapping boys from the neighborhood and selling them to mines, since children were the right size to work in them easily. That would be your kind of Regency, but I think Regencies would bore you.


Lyinar Ka`Bael, Piney Fresh Druidess - Luclin

Ja'Deth Issar Ka'bael
I posted in a title changing thread.
posted 08-18-2002 03:42:53 PM
I don't mind sappy. In moderation. I can be a very sappy guy sometimes. Smarmy. I'm probably worse than Lyinar when it comes down to it.
Lyinar's sweetie and don't you forget it!*
"All those moments will be lost in time, like tears in rain. Time to die. -Roy Batty
*Also Lyinar's attack panda

sigpic courtesy of This Guy, original modified by me

Lyinar Ka`Bael
Are you looking at my pine tree again?
posted 08-18-2002 03:44:32 PM
He is. I'll vouch for that.


Lyinar Ka`Bael, Piney Fresh Druidess - Luclin

MorbId
Pancake
posted 08-18-2002 05:39:36 PM
I do not like romance novels. I really don't consider any romance that focuses more on intrigue or adventure to be a true romance. Romantic, sappy elements are tacked on to too many stories as it is (this espeecially happens in video games), so why seek them out?
Lyinar Ka`Bael
Are you looking at my pine tree again?
posted 08-18-2002 05:45:09 PM
Because they can enhance a story quite nicely when used correctly.


Lyinar Ka`Bael, Piney Fresh Druidess - Luclin

Cap'n Elethi
I'm too sexy for my shirt, too sexy for my shirt...
posted 08-18-2002 08:35:12 PM
I was reading an article the other day about the 6th or 7th book in the 'Clan of The Cave Bear' series. It was hilarious how the author of the article thougt that that series had spawned a whole new genre of 'Prehistorical Romance'. She seemed to take herself seriously.

On the real topic, I was never really into just romance novels. Though, according to Lyinar, they aren't all just about romance.

Now, a good fantasy book, with a happy ending, thats my cup of tea.

Elethi Rian, A Man Of Many Talents
Ozimander
$$$$$$$$$$$
posted 08-18-2002 11:36:31 PM
quote:
When the babel fish was in place, it was apparent Lord Monkah said:

hes trying not to masturbate.


What the FUCK!

I can barely keep Mary Palm away!

I'm fuckin' ADDICTED! But screw romance novels. You have to hold it. I prefer having your hands free to roam.

By which I mean touch yourself...your privates.

Like the penis.

The penis is a good part..

Gypsy.

Cthulhu

Lyinar Ka`Bael
Are you looking at my pine tree again?
posted 08-19-2002 12:18:29 AM
Happy endings are what I like best too, El.

I don't really read a book, or watch a movie, to get reality. I want escape. That's why I don't like non-happy endings.

It's not realistic, sure. But that's the whole point.


Lyinar Ka`Bael, Piney Fresh Druidess - Luclin

Archer-Penguin
Pancake
posted 08-19-2002 12:30:34 AM
I like Harlequins and Regencies! ^.^

The stories are so cute!


[center]
Ta-Daa![/center]
Akiraiu Zenko
Is actually a giddy schoolgirl
posted 08-19-2002 12:44:23 AM
quote:
Lord Monkah had this to say about John Romero:
and more sex the better! NEVER HAVE TOO MUCH SEX! heh

I echo this sentiment!

The artist formerly known as Zephyer Kyuukaze.
Kinanik
Upset about being titless
posted 08-19-2002 01:00:31 AM
I like Fantasy and Mystery and Sci-Fi novels. Romance novels bore me.
Gully Foyle is my name
And Terra is my nation
Deep space is my dwelling place
The stars my destination
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