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Author
Topic: A contest for you all
Callalron
Hires people with hooks
posted 04-18-2002 03:05:34 PM
Today after nearly 4 years working here, the miserable p.o.s. Epson printer that has the major source of aggrivation at work finally bit the big one. To celebra.... er, mourn the loss of this stalwart piece of office automation, I consoled myself by buying a spiffy new HP1200 laser printer to assuage my "grief" over the loss.

Now for the part where the EC community comes in. What should I do to give the old printer the send off it deserves? My original plan was "accidentally" drop it 5 or 6 times. Then I thought about giving it a Viking style funeral.

Give me your suggestions. I want to make this an event.

Callalron
"When mankind finally discovers the center of the universe, a lot of people are going to be upset that it isn't them."
"If you give a man a fish he'll eat for a day. If you teach a man to fish he'll just go out and buy an ugly hat. But if you talk to a starving man about fish, then you've become a consultant."--Dogbert
Arvek, 41 Bounty Hunter
Vrook Lamar server
/dev/null
Pancake
posted 04-18-2002 03:07:11 PM
It must burn in Effigy...

Ask Woody. He knows a guy that can get the job done.

Beep. Beep. Beep... Ohh... I think my porridge is done.
My fellow Americans, as you know, my foreign policy can be summed up in five words: "Iludium-236 Explosive Space Modulator."
When it comes down to it, searching the web without Google is like straining sewage with your teeth.
vertue
Pancake
posted 04-18-2002 03:08:02 PM
Kill it, Office Space Style.

Archers Roxxors!

Janus.
I am not a woman
posted 04-18-2002 03:08:15 PM
Office space, seen that? Do what what they did.
Il Buono
You see, in this world there's two kinds of people, my friend.
posted 04-18-2002 03:08:21 PM
You and a few friends smash it a la Office Space then melt it down in a steel drum.
"Those with loaded guns, and those who dig. You dig."
Kloie
tunactsunamooon
posted 04-18-2002 03:09:39 PM
Peter
Pancake
posted 04-18-2002 03:10:33 PM
High Explosives.

Or if you can find some one dumb, err willing enough light it on fire and pour some LOX on it.

[ 04-18-2002: Message edited by: Pyscho_Pike ]

Janus.
I am not a woman
posted 04-18-2002 03:12:17 PM
Build a catapult out of junk and launch the printer at a stack of cinder blocks shaped like a castle. The printer should be on fire at time of launch
Gydyon
Yes, I am a lawyer. No you can't sue them for that. Shut up, or I'll have your legs broken.
posted 04-18-2002 03:13:13 PM
Anyone mention Office Space yet?
Gydyon
Evercrest Lawyer

Thinking about your posts
(and billing you for it) since 2001

Il Buono
You see, in this world there's two kinds of people, my friend.
posted 04-18-2002 03:14:27 PM
quote:
Gydyon's account was hax0red to write:
Anyone mention Office Space yet?

But I said burn it too!

"Those with loaded guns, and those who dig. You dig."
Pesco
Is a copyright of Peachis. Don't underestimate his pants, either.
posted 04-18-2002 03:15:32 PM
quote:
vertue had this to say about Reading Rainbow:
Kill it, Office Space Style.
Mog
not really a mmembe rof tis boered
posted 04-18-2002 03:16:29 PM
OFFICE SPACE

or drop it a few stories, and vikeing funerals are alwasy nice

fire purdy


Regret calamities if you can thereby help the sufferer; if not, attend to your own work and allready the evil begins to be repaired
- Self Rreliance
`Doc
Cold in an Alley
posted 04-18-2002 03:24:03 PM
quote:
Nobody really understood why vertue wrote:
Kill it, Office Space Style.
I concur.
Base eight is just like base ten, really... if you're missing two fingers. - Tom Lehrer
There are people in this world who do not love their fellow human beings, and I hate people like that! - Tom Lehrer
I want to be a race car passenger; just a guy who bugs the driver. "Say man, can I turn on the radio? You should slow down. Why do we gotta keep going in circles? Can I put my feet out the window? Man, you really like Tide..." - Mitch Hedberg
Please keep your arms, legs, heads, tails, tentacles, pseudopods, wings, and/or other limb-like structures inside the ride at all times.
Please submit all questions, inquests, and/or inquiries, in triplicate, to the Department of Redundancy Department, Division for the Management of Division Management Divisions.

leckzilla!
Squeak!
posted 04-18-2002 03:34:25 PM
Send it to

Leckie Rowledge
onna street
inna town
somewhere in England

...And i'll make it into some bizarre sculpture which will have no use except to perhaps hold your door open for you.

[ 04-18-2002: Message edited by: Leck ]

Falaanla Marr
I AM HOT CHIX
posted 04-18-2002 04:15:58 PM
quote:
vertue spewed forth this undeniable truth:
Kill it, Office Space Style.
Kegwen
Sonyfag
posted 04-18-2002 04:19:22 PM
quote:
There was much rejoicing when vertue said this:
Kill it, Office Space Style.
Beta Tested
Pancake
posted 04-18-2002 04:20:24 PM
Either viking style, or Office Space style. Which ever you think will be more fun.
What's this thing do?
That would be sooo cool if it wasn't going to hurt us.
Melphina's Magelo
Karnaj
Road Warrior Queef
posted 04-18-2002 04:21:51 PM
Attach a hook to each side of the printer. Attach ropes to hooks. Attach same ropes to your truck and the trucks of three friends. Have each person drive in a different cardinal direction.

Show us the photos.

That's the American Dream: to make your life into something you can sell. - Chuck Palahniuk, Haunted

Under capitalism, man exploits man. Under communism, it's just the opposite. - John Kenneth Galbraith



Beer.

OtakuPenguin
Peels like a tangerine, but is juicy like an orange.
posted 04-18-2002 04:22:06 PM
Office Space style!

"Die motherf*ckers die!" =p

..:: This Is The Sound Of Settling ::..
Mog
not really a mmembe rof tis boered
posted 04-18-2002 04:25:11 PM
I actually like karnaj's idae

Regret calamities if you can thereby help the sufferer; if not, attend to your own work and allready the evil begins to be repaired
- Self Rreliance
Ruvie's Alt
Haven't you always wanted a monkey?
posted 04-18-2002 04:32:00 PM
Greatsword.

Seriously, just smash it into eedie beedie liddle bits with a BIG sledgehammer. That's always fun.

Trent
Smurfberry Moneyshot
posted 04-18-2002 05:21:08 PM
BURN IT!!!
Janus.
I am not a woman
posted 04-18-2002 05:22:26 PM
quote:
ImNotTrent attempted to be funny by writing:
BURN IT!!!

What do you burn apart form printers? MORE PRINTERS!
Solstyce
Vampiric pixie that might eat your face, if you're lucky
posted 04-18-2002 05:24:05 PM
Sacrifice.

I'm pretty sure the gods need a printer too.

Shhh. Everyone will hear us. Everyone will know.
Lenlalron Flameblaster
posted 04-18-2002 05:26:15 PM
Drive over it. Be sure to use a truck.
Grammar is your enemy! - While being able to understand someone's sentences might seem like a good idea for a proper essay, complaining on a forum scarcely leaves time for such trivialities. Write fast! You're angry, grrr! Make that show, and forget about things like capital letters, punctuation, and verbs.
Woody
Toast the Destroyer
posted 04-18-2002 07:27:34 PM
**laughs**

Yeah. Rob could take care of it nice and proper.

Of course this time he wants to use something nastier than gunpowder. There's no telling what his evil brain would come up with for ex office equipment.

[ 04-18-2002: Message edited by: Woody ]

Woody Hearn - Cartoonist
GU Comics
Random Insanity Generator
Condom Ninja El Supremo
posted 04-18-2002 07:38:07 PM
quote:
Woody stopped beating up furries long enough to write:
**laughs**

Yeah. Rob could take care of it nice and proper.

Of course this time he wants to use something nastier than gunpowder. There's no telling what his evil brain would come up with for ex office equipment.


We expect more vid clips!

* NullDevice kicks the server. "Floggings will continue until processing power improves!"
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"That was black magic, and it was easy to use. Easy and fun. Like Legos." -- Harry Dresden
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