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Author
Topic: The One OS
Arttemis the Rogue
Amethyst's sex toy
posted 01-09-2002 07:57:53 PM
Recently one of my friends, a computer wizard, paid me a visit. As we were talking I mentioned that I had recently installed Windows XP on my PC. I told him how happy I was with this operating system and showed him the Windows XP CD. To my surprise he threw it into my microwave oven and turned it on. Instantly I got very upset, because the CD had become precious to me, but he said: "Do not worry, it is unharmed."

After a few minutes he took the CD out, gave it to me and said: "Take a close look at it."

To my surprise the CD was quite cold to hold and it seemed to be heavier than before. At first I could not see anything, but on the inner edge of the central hole I saw an inscription, an inscription finer than anything I had ever seen before. The inscription shone piercingly bright, and yet remote, as if out of a great depth: 12413AEB2ED4FA5E6F7D78E78BEDE820945092OF923A40EElOE5IOCC
98D444AA08EI324

"I cannot understand the fiery letters," I said in a timid voice.

"No but I can," he said. "The letters are Hex, of an ancient mode, but the language is that of Microsoft, which I shall not utter here. But in common English this is what it says:

"'One OS to rule them all, One OS to find them, One OS to bring them all and in the darkness bind them.'

"It is only two lines from a verse long known in System-lore." "'Three OS's from corporate-kings in their towers of glass, Seven from valley-lords where orchards used to grow, Nine from dotcoms doomed to die, One from the Dark Lord Gates on his dark throne In the Land of Redmond where the Shadows lie. One OS to rule them all, One OS to find them, One OS to bring them all And in the darkness bind them, In the Land of Redmond where the Shadows lie.'"

- from the tome of the ancient system lore (translated to modern from ancient hex).
Sentow, Maybe
Pancake
posted 01-09-2002 08:00:14 PM
Heh!
Once more into the breach, my friends, once more. We'll close the wall with our dead. In peace, nothing so becomes a man as modesty and humility, but when the blast of war blows in our ears, then imitate the action of the tiger, summon up the blood, disguise fair nature with rage and lend the eye a terrible aspect.
Bloodsage
Heart Attack
posted 01-09-2002 08:03:26 PM
Very nice.

Two wavy snaps and a pelvic thrust!

To reign is worth ambition, though in Hell:
Better to reign in Hell than serve in Heaven.

--Satan, quoted by John Milton

Tarquinn
Personally responsible for the decline of the American Dollar
posted 01-09-2002 08:06:58 PM
I liek!
~Never underestimate the power of a Dark Clown.
Ruvie's Alt
Haven't you always wanted a monkey?
posted 01-09-2002 08:09:34 PM
Maybe the code gives you access to special features.

See if there's anything you have to put a code into. Look around on the web for WinXP easter eggs. (One was found in Win95, it showed the credits.)

Zaza
I don't give a damn.
posted 01-09-2002 08:13:33 PM
quote:
Ruvyen Warblade had this to say about Robocop:
Maybe the code gives you access to special features.

See if there's anything you have to put a code into. Look around on the web for WinXP easter eggs. (One was found in Win95, it showed the credits.)


You really are serious, are you not?

...

Waisztarroz
I love democracy
posted 01-09-2002 08:14:14 PM
quote:
Za'Yth had this to say about Tron:
You really are serious, are you not?

...


It's Ruvyen we're talking about here.

Yes, that's right, hot live sex!
There's a raptor behind you.
Resident grammar whore.
Warning, flames imminent!
Waisztarroz
I love democracy
posted 01-09-2002 08:16:40 PM
quote:
Arttemis the Twink thought this was the Ricky Martin Fan Club Forum and wrote:
12413AEB2ED4FA5E6F7D78E78BEDE820945092OF923A40EElOE5IOCC

I and O aren't hex, Artt. =)

Otherwise I thought this was a pretty clever and funny story.

[ 01-09-2002: Message edited by: WaisztarrozBarrimas ]

Yes, that's right, hot live sex!
There's a raptor behind you.
Resident grammar whore.
Warning, flames imminent!
Lyinar Ka`Bael
Are you looking at my pine tree again?
posted 01-10-2002 01:25:47 AM
ROFL!

That's cute, Art


Lyinar Ka`Bael, Piney Fresh Druidess - Luclin

Kolak
Pancake
posted 01-10-2002 04:11:43 AM
quote:
WaisztarrozBarrimas had this to say about dark elf butts:
I and O aren't hex, Artt. =)

Otherwise I thought this was a pretty clever and funny story.


yeah, hex only goes from 1-F (or 0-F, i can't remember)

very funny story, tho

NOTE: This is an automated e-mail post, please do not reply
ph34r me
This uselss post brought to you by:
Anthrax - The other white powder

Rodent King
Stabbed in the Eye
posted 01-10-2002 04:54:55 AM
Uh...you should put in a disclaimer to NOT put your windows cd's into your microwave. I just tri...think that some idiot might actually try something that dumb!

[ 01-10-2002: Message edited by: Rodent King ]

My inner child is bigger than my outer adult.
Bloodsage
Heart Attack
posted 01-10-2002 05:18:42 AM
Like the moron in Idaho who gave himself massive burns someplace extremely sensitive after seeing American Pie?

What a dumbass.

To reign is worth ambition, though in Hell:
Better to reign in Hell than serve in Heaven.

--Satan, quoted by John Milton

Falaanla Marr
I AM HOT CHIX
posted 01-10-2002 05:42:06 AM
quote:
WaisztarrozBarrimas had this to say about Pirotess:
I and O aren't hex, Artt. =)

Otherwise I thought this was a pretty clever and funny story.



Well DUH!

its ANCIENT hex, silly.

*grin*

Hostile Makeover
Evil as chocolate covered thistles
posted 01-10-2002 07:13:32 AM
*sends this off to about half a dozen friends*
Bajah
Thooooooor
posted 01-10-2002 07:34:09 AM
Heheh, Artt didn't write this, guys

I got it in my email, too :P

Kolak
Pancake
posted 01-10-2002 11:55:59 AM
quote:
And I was all like 'Oh yeah?' and Bajah was all like:
Heheh, Artt didn't write this, guys

I got it in my email, too :P



heh.

what it'd actually be in hex:

code:
4F6E65204F5320746F2072756C65207468656D20616C6C2C204F6E65204F5320746F2066696E64207468656D2C204F6E65204F5320746F206272696E67207468656D20616C6C20616E6420696E20746865206461726B6E 6573732062696E64207468656D2E 

NOTE: This is an automated e-mail post, please do not reply
ph34r me
This uselss post brought to you by:
Anthrax - The other white powder

Ja'Deth Issar Ka'bael
I posted in a title changing thread.
posted 01-10-2002 12:03:13 PM
Kolak knows ancient hex! badass!
Lyinar's sweetie and don't you forget it!*
"All those moments will be lost in time, like tears in rain. Time to die. -Roy Batty
*Also Lyinar's attack panda

sigpic courtesy of This Guy, original modified by me

/dev/null
Pancake
posted 01-10-2002 12:11:22 PM
"Muahahah"
Beep. Beep. Beep... Ohh... I think my porridge is done.
My fellow Americans, as you know, my foreign policy can be summed up in five words: "Iludium-236 Explosive Space Modulator."
When it comes down to it, searching the web without Google is like straining sewage with your teeth.
Arttemis the Rogue
Amethyst's sex toy
posted 01-10-2002 02:34:32 PM
quote:
Bajah thought this was the Ricky Martin Fan Club Forum and wrote:
Heheh, Artt didn't write this, guys

I got it in my email, too :P


d00d! shtu up!

Heh, no, I didn't write this. I forgot to add my little disclaimer thingy. I thought it was the funney, though

All times are US/Eastern
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