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Topic: about Love..
Nae
Fun with Chocolate
posted 11-05-2001 02:00:00 PM
While reading one of my favorite books for the 4th time, I came upon a passage that totally hit me hard. I wanted to share it with you guys, maybe it will help you all understand Love a bit better. Or confuse the issue even more, which isn't really such a bad thing after all. Puzzles are fun, aren't they?

This is from Like Water For Chocolate by Laura Esquivel. I recommend the movie too, it is so sweet.

..let me tell you something I have never told a soul. My grandmother had a very ineresting theory; she said that each of us is born with a box of matches inside us but we can't strike them all by ourselves; just as in the experiment, we need oxygen and a candle to help. In this case, the oxygen, for example, would come from the breath of the person you love; the candle could be any kind of food, music, caress, word or sound that engenders the explosion that lights one of the matches.

For a moment we are dazzled by an intense emotion. A pleasant warmth grows within us, fading slowly as time goes by, until a new explosion comes along to revive it. Each person has to discover what will set off those explosions in order to live, since the combustion that occurs when one of them is ignited is what nourishes the soul. That fire, in short, is its food. If one doesn't find out in time what will set off these explosions, the box of matches dampens, and not a single match will ever be lighted.

If that happens, the soul flees from the body and goes to wander among the deepest shades, trying in vain to find food to nourish itself, unaware that only the body it left behind, cold and defenseless, is capable of providing that food.

Mightion Defensor
posted 11-05-2001 02:09:00 PM
I saw the dubbed version of the movie on HBO several years back. Damned depressing movie. I did find it funny how that her older sister died of several digestive distress...

I wanted to slap that mother so hard...

(Notice I didn't say I didn't like the movie; just that it was darned depressing )

Nae
Fun with Chocolate
posted 11-05-2001 02:16:00 PM
Love stories are always sad, I don't know why, but they are. This one is sad, but happy too.
Solstyce
Vampiric pixie that might eat your face, if you're lucky
posted 11-05-2001 02:36:00 PM
I saw the dubbed movie. Good god the dubbing was horrific. The doctor guy sounded like he was going to rape and kill everyone... in short, creepy as all hell.

But it was a cool movie. And I want the recipes for that uber-aphrodesiac food, damnit!

Shhh. Everyone will hear us. Everyone will know.
Nae
Fun with Chocolate
posted 11-05-2001 02:49:00 PM
The recipes are in the book.

The main ingredient is your emotion while cooking it... yummy!

JooJooFlop
Hungry Hungry Hippo
posted 11-05-2001 04:57:00 PM
quote:
Illanae had this to say about Captain Planet:
Love stories are always sad, I don't know why, but they are. This one is sad, but happy too.

I think it has to do with the old saying that one must know loss before they know true happiness.

Besides, if nothing but good things happened in a love story it would be very boring.

I don't know how to be sexy. If I catch a girl looking at me and our eyes lock, I panic and open mine wider. Then I lick my lips and rub my genitals. And mouth the words "You're dead."
Lenlalron Flameblaster
posted 11-05-2001 04:58:00 PM
If I can't get dates, does that mean my matches are ugly?
Grammar is your enemy! - While being able to understand someone's sentences might seem like a good idea for a proper essay, complaining on a forum scarcely leaves time for such trivialities. Write fast! You're angry, grrr! Make that show, and forget about things like capital letters, punctuation, and verbs.
Nae
Fun with Chocolate
posted 11-05-2001 06:04:00 PM
quote:
Lenlalron had this to say about dark elf butts:
If I can't get dates, does that mean my matches are ugly?

It just means you haven't found the one that lights your matches yet, or the one whose matches you light. You may be destined to find a lover years from now, and your Love will burn hot like a bonfire, if you burnt out all your matches now, you would be selling that hot Love short.

Mortious
Gluttonous Overlard
posted 11-05-2001 06:08:00 PM
Nae speaks wisely.

Listen to the Nae.

Avylen
Pull my finger!!
posted 11-05-2001 06:20:00 PM
I dislike this quote. It seems to say that one must search for happiness, and that life is worthless without love and without the "necessities of living". However I think this is a nieve veiw. I always dislike anyveiw in which people serch for things outside themselves, some say I am afriad to need something other than myself, but I say that ones veiw on the world is the only driving force of life and relying on anything else if foolish and setting one's self up for demise. Because at any molment the world may send you to "hell", and I for one would like to be ready for that, and not melt down into a pile of goop, but I am weird like that.
"When people see something as beautiful, other things become ugly. When people see somethings as good, other things become bad. So is the way of life."
Nae
Fun with Chocolate
posted 11-05-2001 06:28:00 PM
Why would you want to live a life without Love?

I am not saying that life is worthless without it, but why wouldn't you want to experience it?

It makes everything in life so much nicer.

Apples are crunchier, the mountains are more grand, clouds are fluffier, your heart and your very spirit absorbs more of the world around you. You begin to notice all the wonderful things in life, and you take nothing for granted. Appreciation of the beauty that surrounds you and your lover, sharing it with her/him, it is like an explosion of happiness.

I can't imagine living a life without that.

Avylen
Pull my finger!!
posted 11-05-2001 06:36:00 PM
Illane, that is the exact reason I have a sort of fear of love, it is the opiate of humanity. One should be happy with what one has, and not happy as in content, but as in not searching for anything else. Love is all good and well, but if luck turns against you, can you really say you can just "roll with that punch". I think often people rely to much on things like love and/or the "combustion inside ones self" for happiness. I may love someday, but never completely I couldn't take the risk, I am fine and dandy without love, and having would just open means for pain.

[ 11-05-2001: Message edited by: Avylen ]

"When people see something as beautiful, other things become ugly. When people see somethings as good, other things become bad. So is the way of life."
Ozimander
$$$$$$$$$$$
posted 11-05-2001 06:38:00 PM
If someone asked me "What is love?" I'd have to say "One of the greatest feelings in the world, a whirlpool of emotion, churning your emotions about in a frenzy of hope, freedom and passion. A liberating storm that sets your boundries open and leaves you a clear road to drive along" and then I'd turn and leave. But before I'd leave, I'd turn around and say with a smirk "But it's even better when they feel the same way"

Ozius

P.S. Avylen dislikes this qoute too! That little bugger

Ozius

Lenlalron Flameblaster
posted 11-05-2001 06:39:00 PM
quote:
Avylen had this to say about (_|_):
Illane, that is the exact reason I have a sort of fear of love, it is the opiate of humanity. One should be happy with what one has, and not happy as in content, but as in not searching for anything else. Love is all good and well, but if luck turns against you, can you really say you can just "roll with that punch". I think often people rely to much on things like love and/or the "combustion inside ones self" for happiness. I may love someday, but never completely I couldn't take the risk, I am fine and dandy without love, and having would just open means for pain.

Heh, we all need love. Sorry. Unless you were a street urchin, fending for yourself (and I doubt that), you need the love of your parents to live well.

Grammar is your enemy! - While being able to understand someone's sentences might seem like a good idea for a proper essay, complaining on a forum scarcely leaves time for such trivialities. Write fast! You're angry, grrr! Make that show, and forget about things like capital letters, punctuation, and verbs.
Avylen
Pull my finger!!
posted 11-05-2001 06:44:00 PM
Len, I am talking about this from an emotional standpoint, so yes you need your parents love inorder to stay alive physically, but emotionally I feel there should be no need for your parents. A want is fine, but only to a certian point, when it starts detracting from your well being, stop the want. And yes, you can stop wants.

[ 11-05-2001: Message edited by: Avylen ]

"When people see something as beautiful, other things become ugly. When people see somethings as good, other things become bad. So is the way of life."
Nae
Fun with Chocolate
posted 11-05-2001 06:56:00 PM
Of course children have emotional needs for their parents! What are you thinking!??!! A child raised without the love that their parents can give them would be a automaton, or severely fucked up. A person raised not knowing love would have nothing to value in life.

Don't be afraid to love, pain comes in so many ways, denying yourself pleasure in fear of pain is just sad.

Avylen
Pull my finger!!
posted 11-05-2001 07:06:00 PM
Haha, you missed the point Illane, I am happy, and I am not just saying this to prove a point, if one relies on the outside for happiness one is doomed to wallow in one's own pity for what the world "should be". As for kids, I think again that people who allow things like unloving parents to "screw them up" need to relook at life, and realise again that relying on the outside just leads to pain. Be happy for the hell of it, not because someones loves you, not becuase your parents love you. If you wnt to be happy, then be happy, and if you need outside guidance for happiness than you can't truely be happy, because good things can always be taken away, and smiling for the hell of it never can.
"When people see something as beautiful, other things become ugly. When people see somethings as good, other things become bad. So is the way of life."
Nae
Fun with Chocolate
posted 11-05-2001 07:10:00 PM
Love > all
Avylen
Pull my finger!!
posted 11-05-2001 07:15:00 PM
And I truely am happy that you are happy, I just hope that you will never have to cry yourself to sleep because you feel that way. I have seen too many people destroyed and I hope it never happens to you, so please, if you ever are really, truely sad just remember my words, and try to smile for the hell of it . You are probably tired of my ramblings now so I shall stop, though I am glad I got to put my opinion on paper (errr or computer thingy if you wanna be more precise). I always like talking about things like this.
"When people see something as beautiful, other things become ugly. When people see somethings as good, other things become bad. So is the way of life."
Ozimander
$$$$$$$$$$$
posted 11-05-2001 07:15:00 PM
Give up the ghost Avylen. Ya can't always be the Guru of Knowledge. You may be very wise and quick on your feet but your just wrong this time. I know you well and the concept of love is on a diffrent level then your used to. You have a basic knowledge of it, like everyone normally does but your judging it all on your knowledge of it currently. Not your expirance or a deeper insight of it. I don't wana sound rude, your a good friend but your just friggin' wrong about something this time. Love isn't like going out hunting demon beasts in the snow in your boxers with a fishing pole my friend. It's not all painful. You can't always avoid pain either. It makes us human and in a certain sense, there is almost no greater gift then to be human (Yes, that is debatable, but in the current sense, it is wonderful)

Ozius
Ozius

Densetsu
NOT DRYSART
posted 11-05-2001 07:16:00 PM
quote:
And I was all like 'Oh yeah?' and Illanae was all like:

Don't be afraid to love, pain comes in so many ways, denying yourself pleasure in fear of pain is just sad.

She's absolutely right.
I was in the Virgin Islands once. I met a girl, we ate lobster, drank piña coladas. At sunset, we made love like sea otters. That was a pretty good day. Why couldn't I get that day over, and over?
Olethros et Teleute
Everyone's favorite seven foot tall, orc-hating, bad-ass barbarian babe!
posted 11-05-2001 07:18:00 PM
Actually, Avylen, my view on love is that yes, you should find happiness from within, but when you have love, it (like Nae said) acts as an explosion and can make your happiness so much brighter and warmer, because not only are you feeling joy from the love you are recieving, but your love in turn can be felt by others and can bring others happiness as well.
We as people are a society, and while we can survive as individuals, we thrive together. You can find happiness within yourself, like you said, but it's so much nicer when you can share it with people you care about, and they can in turn share their happiness and love with you.
Avylen
Pull my finger!!
posted 11-05-2001 07:21:00 PM
Haha, Oz, Oz. You doom yourslef with your own words. There is nothing in the world to stop you from feeling as happy as you do when you are in love, every day of every week. The only boundary is yourself. You feel that love somehow unlocks a hidden part of yourself with a key you do not have, but again you are delusional. You control yourself completely and absolutely, so handing control over to somehting else is foolish, I am not saying love is a bad thing, I am saying the feeling that love has something which you can't get on your own is dangerous especially if you get "hooked" on the happiness of love. Stop chasing your own ghost Oz, that ghost of the miracle which shall bring you happiness, you can do it whenever you want, don't limit yourself by only being that happy with love.

[ 11-05-2001: Message edited by: Avylen ]

"When people see something as beautiful, other things become ugly. When people see somethings as good, other things become bad. So is the way of life."
Nae
Fun with Chocolate
posted 11-05-2001 07:30:00 PM
You are happy because you love yourself. That is the first step. You are afraid to love others because you know that the most stable relationship you can have is with yourself. It's not like you are going to leave yourself, right? Don't be so fearful, being loved by someone is a miracle, no matter how long it lasts. Feeling that love is greater than anything else.
Densetsu
NOT DRYSART
posted 11-05-2001 07:33:00 PM
quote:
Illanae had this to say about Matthew Broderick:

Don't be afraid to love, pain comes in so many ways, denying yourself pleasure in fear of pain is just sad.

Hey Nae, did you get this quote from somewhere else, or is it out of your own noggin? If I wanna use it, I want to know the appropriate party to give credit to.
I was in the Virgin Islands once. I met a girl, we ate lobster, drank piña coladas. At sunset, we made love like sea otters. That was a pretty good day. Why couldn't I get that day over, and over?
Ozimander
$$$$$$$$$$$
posted 11-05-2001 07:36:00 PM
quote:
Avylen thought this was the Ricky Martin Fan Club Forum and wrote:
Haha, Oz, Oz. You doom yourslef with your own words. There is nothing in the world to stop you from feeling as happy as you do when you are in love, every day of every week. The only boundary is yourself. You feel that love somehow unlocks a hidden part of yourself with a key you do not have, but again you are delusional. You control yourself completely and absolutely, so handing control over to somehting else is foolish, I am not saying love is a bad thing, I am saying the feeling that love has something which you can't get on your own is dangerous especially if you get "hooked" on the happiness of love. Stop chasing your own ghost Oz, that ghost of the miracle which shall bring you happiness, you can do it whenever you want, don't limit yourself by only being that happy with love.

Baka! You contort and misunderstand my words! But I have some work to do so we will debate this during B period tomarrow. Adios.

Ozius

Sentow, Maybe
Pancake
posted 11-05-2001 07:37:00 PM
Curiously, this thread reminds me of the single most scathing remark I ever heard in a chat room.

"::sigh:: You know that movie Ever After? My boyfriend and I are just like that."
"Until you break up."

I mean... ow. They say the truth hurts, but... OW

Once more into the breach, my friends, once more. We'll close the wall with our dead. In peace, nothing so becomes a man as modesty and humility, but when the blast of war blows in our ears, then imitate the action of the tiger, summon up the blood, disguise fair nature with rage and lend the eye a terrible aspect.
Nae
Fun with Chocolate
posted 11-05-2001 07:37:00 PM
quote:
Densetsu had this to say about Pirotess:
[QUOTE]Illanae had this to say about Matthew Broderick:
[qb]
Don't be afraid to love, pain comes in so many ways, denying yourself pleasure in fear of pain is just sad.

Hey Nae, did you get this quote from somewhere else, or is it out of your own noggin? If I wanna use it, I want to know the appropriate party to give credit to. [/QB][/QUOTE]

It was all me baby.

Kloie
tunactsunamooon
posted 11-05-2001 07:41:00 PM
"Love has reasons that reason knows nothing of."

<3<3<3

Avylen
Pull my finger!!
posted 11-05-2001 07:42:00 PM
Love is only greater than anything else Illane because you make it so, you deem it to have some holy power I do not see. There is nothing mystical about love, no magic wand. It is simply a change in your veiw of the world, why not make that change without love, love is not needed inorder to make you so called Miracle occur.

Olethros, I must say I like your post, I like the way you put things. Since as I have always realised the key flaw in my veiw on love is other people "Is not making other people happy good, and if so then if by loving someone you make them happy and there for love is a good act?", however I agree that love does help others, I dare say that people only feel exalted by love because again, they feel some magic occurs, they delude themselves into thinking they can't be as happy without people as with. So, again, I am not saying love is a bad thing, it can help others, but as for helping one's self, that exalting feeling connected with love only clouds the fact that a persons veiw of the world in it's entirety, no exeptions, comes from one's self and not other people at all.

"When people see something as beautiful, other things become ugly. When people see somethings as good, other things become bad. So is the way of life."
Densetsu
NOT DRYSART
posted 11-05-2001 07:43:00 PM

|
|
V

[ 11-05-2001: Message edited by: Densetsu ]

I was in the Virgin Islands once. I met a girl, we ate lobster, drank piña coladas. At sunset, we made love like sea otters. That was a pretty good day. Why couldn't I get that day over, and over?
Sentow, Maybe
Pancake
posted 11-05-2001 07:43:00 PM
J: Well you know what they say. "It's better to have loved and lost than never to have loved at all."

K: Try it sometime.

Once more into the breach, my friends, once more. We'll close the wall with our dead. In peace, nothing so becomes a man as modesty and humility, but when the blast of war blows in our ears, then imitate the action of the tiger, summon up the blood, disguise fair nature with rage and lend the eye a terrible aspect.
Nae
Fun with Chocolate
posted 11-05-2001 07:47:00 PM
hehe Densetsu! you should add "~Illanae, Pally of Love" after the quote imo!

Densetsu
NOT DRYSART
posted 11-05-2001 08:03:00 PM
quote:
Illanae had this to say about Cuba:
hehe Densetsu! you should add "~Illanae, Pally of Love" after the quote imo!



Done.
I was in the Virgin Islands once. I met a girl, we ate lobster, drank piña coladas. At sunset, we made love like sea otters. That was a pretty good day. Why couldn't I get that day over, and over?
Azrael Heavenblade
Damn Dirty Godmoder
posted 11-05-2001 08:19:00 PM
My life was in a virtual vaccuum of love for a long time. I mean, I had loving parents and a occasionally supportive brother, but once I got to school I had very few friends, and most tended to pick on me simply because I was new, once they got to know me they became my friends. But, lacking that sense of friendship most times hurt me badly. Most people live in one town and grow very close to their friends, who they've been with since kindergarten, and they often go to college together.

You might laugh at me for admitting this, but it was not fun being "the new kid" all the time. I switched schools at least 6 times as I moved, and went through about 13 school buildings. I always wanted to strike back at my tormentors, but I was taught never to lash out in anger, so the anger, pain, hurt, fear, sadness, and especially lonliness was all internalized. Like those matches denied air, I was really unable, or unwilling to try and form relationships in fear that they would turn out to be bullies, or I would be forced to leave them again, which happened constantly every time I got a girlfriend.

Brief ignitions, these short friendships and mini-romances allowed me to keep going, and as I grew in physical and mental strength, I felt better about myself, but I was still forever lonely. Being in college now, and in a relationship that is likely to last, an inferno is now burning, and life is grand, but I can't help but remember the abyss I crawled away from. Loneliness is perhaps the most damaging of all negative emotions, because we depend on others for so much, to share our sorrows and joys, to live out our lives in each other's company. Something I have always lacked, until recently.

You may be thinking, "What does this guy have to complain about? There's plenty worse off than him..." Well, most people, even if they live in a cardboard box has somebody that shares their situation, someone that's kind to them in their times of need, someone that will always be there. Growing up, I had no such sense of that outside my family. People who have gone through divorces still have 1 parent and still likely have all their friends. People living in the ghetto still have their homies. I had nobody I could count on to be there next year.

These two songs by Linkin Park fairly sum of the majority of my life:

BY MYSELF:

What do I do to ignore them behind me?
Do I follow my instincts blindly?
Do I hide my pride / from these bad dreams
And give in to sad thoughts that are maddening?
Do I / sit here and try to stand it?
Or do I / try to catch them red – handed?
Do I trust some and get fooled by phoniness,
Or do I trust nobody and live in loneliness?
Because I can’t hold on / when I’m stretched so thin
I make the right moves but I’m lost within
I put on my daily façade but then
I just end up getting hurt again
By myself [myself]
I ask why, but in my mind
I find I can’t rely on myself

I can’t hold on
To what I want when I’m stretched so thin
It’s all too much to take in
I can’t hold on
To anything watching everything spin
With thoughts of failure sinking in

If I
Turn my back I’m defenseless
And to go blindly seems senseless
If I hide my pride and let it all go on / then they’ll
Take from me ‘till everything is gone
If I let them go I’ll be outdone
But if I try to catch them I’ll be outrun
If I’m killed by the questions like a cancer
Then I’ll be buried in the silence of the answer
[by myself]

How do you think / I’ve lost so much
I’m so afraid / I’m out of touch
How do you expect / I will know what to do
When all I know / Is what you tell me to
Don’t you know
I can’t tell you how to make it go
No matter what I do, how hard I try
I can’t seem to convince myself why
I’m stuck on the outside


IN THE END:

It starts with one thing
I don't know why
It doesn't even matter how hard you try
keep that in mind
I designed this rhyme
To explain in due time
All I know
Time is a valuable thing
Watch it fly by as the pendulum swings
Watch it count down to the end of the day
The clock ticks life away
It's so unreal
Didn't look out below
Watch the time go right out the window
Trying to hold on, but didn't even know
Wasted it all just to watch you go
I kept everything inside and even though I tried, it all fell apart
What it meant to me will eventually be a memory of a time when

I tried so hard
And got so far
But in the end
It doesn't even matter
I had to fall
To lose it all
But in the end
It doesn't even matter

One thing, I don't know why
It doesn't even matter how hard you try
keep that in mind
I designed this rhyme, to remind myself how
I tried so hard
In spite of the way you were mocking me
Acting like I was part of your property
Remembering all the times you fought with me
I'm surprised it got so (far)
Things aren't the way they were before
You wouldn't even recognize me anymore
Not that you knew me back then
But it all comes back to me (in the end)
You kept everything inside and even though I tried, it all fell apart
What it meant to me will eventually be a memory of a time when I

Chorus

I've put my trust in you
Pushed as far as I can go
And for all this
There's only one thing you should know (2x)

Chorus

However, I seem to be following a different tune right now, and you know what it is? "All you need is love", by the Beatles. It's true, all you really need is love. I could forget all my dreams of wealth and power if it meant having someone who would love me for the rest of my life.

Love and respect each other.

-Azrael

"The basic tool for manipulation of reality is the manipulation of words. If you can control the meaning of words, you can control the people who must use them." - Philip K. Dick
Ragabash
Pancake
posted 11-05-2001 09:07:00 PM
I agree with "K"

*referring to Sentows message*

Feed my hungry soul.
Solstyce
Vampiric pixie that might eat your face, if you're lucky
posted 11-05-2001 09:20:00 PM
Love is the wild factor no one counts on. that one thing that just comes in out of the blue and smacks you where you never suspected it would. Love is life. Love is suicide. It's an incredible rollercoaster ride of emotion that you never even knew yourself capable of feeling. It is by no means needed, I could go through life loving no one, and what scares me is that in my emotional pursuit to put up a shield against all that could hurt me, I might have put up a shield against that, too. One can live without it. But it's like spending all your life in a cage, being allowed one day to romp in the woods and then expected to go back in your cage. It's wild. It's untame. It's the unknown factor that changes everything.
Shhh. Everyone will hear us. Everyone will know.
Mortious
Gluttonous Overlard
posted 11-05-2001 09:31:00 PM
Mortious pulls Avylen's finger

That's all he needs in life

Densetsu
NOT DRYSART
posted 11-05-2001 09:35:00 PM
Sure, you can SURVIVE without love, but can you LIVE without love?
I was in the Virgin Islands once. I met a girl, we ate lobster, drank piña coladas. At sunset, we made love like sea otters. That was a pretty good day. Why couldn't I get that day over, and over?
Rowyl
Pancake
posted 11-05-2001 09:42:00 PM
quote:
Kloie had this to say about Optimus Prime:
"Love has reasons that reason knows nothing of."

<3<3<3


That is a perfect quote!

-Rowyl
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