A store owner was angry that he had gotten robbed 5 times in the past year. So, the next time two thieves came to rob his store, they met a little surprise in the form of the store owner unloading a semi-automatic pistol on them.

A terrified clerk got an idea that saved his shop hundreds of dollars. He offered to buy the guns from the robber. The robber sold both guns to the clerk for $600. Of course, the clerk then pointed both guns at the man and made him return the money, then let him go. He wasn't disturbed that the man may come back, because anyone that stupid is bound to be caught soon enough.

A man held up a store, wielding a sawed off shotgun. When the clerk set down the money, the robber set down his shotgun to pick it up. That's when the clerk pounced on the rifle, surprising the man and making him drop his cash as he ran off. The clerk now keeps the gun behind the desk incase anyone wants to try a robbery again.

A man held up a bank and escaped with nearly $2000 dollars. While running, he dropped the money, his shotgun fell apart, and his mask fell off. When he returned to collect the pieces, he walked right into the arms of investigating police.

A man attempted to hold up a bank. He held his coat over his hand and said he had a weapon under it. The coat slipped and revealed his hand, to which he replied "It's an invisible gun." He was laughed out of the bank.

An enraged man burst into a bank, started waving around a pistol and shouted "This is a stickup!". When the clerk asked him if he would like it in a plastic bag or a paper bag, the man responded "Darn right it's a real gun!". Suspecting the man was deaf, they set off the security alarm. It was deathly loud, but the man didn't notice it. After around 30 minutes of the man waving the pistol around and the occasional shouts of "I am a trained killer!", the police arrived and arrested him with attempted robbery. He later sued the bank for abusing his disability.

Late one night, a man was having a couple boozes with his friend when they ran out of beer. He went to the store to find it had closed earlier. He then tried to steal some booze from the store. First, he tried to cut a hole in the roof, and succeeded in breaking the glass, cutting himself, and hurting his abdomen as he fell onto the ground in the store. He then attempted to throw a bottle through the hole, and managed to set off the burgler alarm. He ran through the glass windows, cutting off a portion of his finger and leaving a blood trail straight to his front door. He was fined $200 dollars, which was the amount of the repairs.

HeeHee, Those are funny...

roflmao

I have some more... provided I can find where I put the book again.

Dude that owns... what's the book called?

I think it was called "The World's DUMBEST Criminals", written by the editor of the "Fourteen Times".

I found it in a Chapter's bookstore.

I read about this one a few years ago.

A guy broke into a store by crawling trough a rooftop AC unit into the ductwork. He went to crawl down through a vent into the store, and fell down through the vent landing on top of a bathroom toilet stall partition. Due to the low ceiling height, his torso was still stuck in the ductwork leaving him trapped straddling the partition. Bad thing is he broke in on a friday night, and was stuck there till employees found him monday morning. The cops came and rescued him then, but the store owner didn't press charges as he felt the man had been more than sufficiently punished.

Sar...

[ 06-29-2001: Message edited by: Sarudani Miolnir ]

grrr... wrong button.

[ 06-29-2001: Message edited by: Sarudani Miolnir ]

I heard about a robber that stole some money from a bank, and after that, they made sure no one leaved. They had each customer say "This is a stickup!". When it was the robber's turn, he said "That is not what I said." XD Another case of stupiditis.

here's a good one, guy broke into a store by using the skylight, couldn't get back out so he called the cops.