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Topic: Uwe Boll breaks down and cries about his failures.
Khyron
Hello, my mushy friend...
posted 05-20-2008 03:13:57 PM
You may remember a previous thread about the drama that this guy wallows in. Other people might roll their eyes at him, but I personally find it absolutely hilarious. He's absolutely delusional and completely out of touch with reality. There's always a chucklefest every time he opens his mouth.

Except, now we've been too hard on him.

From : http://www.postal-the-movie.com/index.htm

quote:
To all of you writing now about me and the fact that POSTAL is not getting screens.

its okay ..its fun kicking a guy nonstop who is on the ground

you are all not getting it that i'm the guy who made it against the big hollywood system and you are all only busy to destroy me and finish me up
and then you YOU WON WHAT ? the attention of the studios, michael bay .. ?????
if you damage me you feel closer to Hollywood ? what is your game plan?

you want only movies like JUMPER , SPEED RACER , WHAT HAPPENDS IN VEGAS ...? then keep going and your dreams will be fullfilled. POSTAL makes some very important points ..but you dont wanna see that .... : that Bush used the SEPTEMBER 11 to start a war against a country what had nothing to do with Bin Laden etc.... but this all doesnt matter because you are all busy to THINK that INDIANA JONES or NARNIA are important movies ... but in real they are empty shells of an industry what wants to make money and what wants to keep you looking "escape movies" with nothing in it. in between they are putting some CONTROVERSIAL movies to show that they can do also IMPORTANT movies ...but also this movies are not really critical....they only supporting the system and not showing the big picture. and POSTAL shows the BIG PICTURE ...it nails the absurd situation with all the stupid religions, races and nations we are living in. POSTAL is not accepting bullshit politics. POSTAL has not the opinion that Bush made mistakes - POSTAL has the opinion that it is a scandal that BUSH is not in jail. What happened in America in the last 7 years is the biggest joke since Columbus stepped on that land.

but instead of seeing the courage i had in doing that movie against everybody who tried to stop me - you are sitting on your desks and you are working on stories about me ....and my image as the worst director on earth...and you fullfill what your editor wants from you in regards of uwe boll ...or you fullfill what you think makes you a cooler guy in the internet ...and you are not getting it that you are only interested in movies like IRON MAN or HULK or KUNG FU PANDA or the MUMMY 3 because the studios spending 60 mio. $ in advertising to make you interested in NON INTERESTING movies. how many times you wanna keep going in movies only because the TRAILER was so cool and the CGI was so great ?

thanks for reading this


Uwe Boll


Vorago
A completely different kind of Buckethead
posted 05-20-2008 03:27:08 PM
Sakkra
Office Linebacker
posted 05-20-2008 04:25:42 PM
Good times.
Greenlit
posted 05-20-2008 04:29:20 PM
Huh, so Iron Man did have a $50 million marketing budget.

It's certainly paid off; the last I heard $500 million in revenue was just around the corner, if not already surpassed.

I Jon Favreau

Maradon!
posted 05-20-2008 04:48:03 PM
I celebrate this idiotic man's suffering.
Steven Steve
posted 05-20-2008 04:51:39 PM
Can't any of you intellectual midgets understand the artistic genius of this piece of shit film!?
"Absolutely NOTHING [will stop me from buying Diablo III]. I will buy it regardless of what they do."
- Grawbad, Battle.net forums

"Don't want to sound like a fanboy, but I am with you. I'll buy it for sure, it's just a matter of for how long I will be playing it..."
- Silvast, Battle.net forums

Maradon!
posted 05-20-2008 06:23:55 PM
Just remember: If you oppose the Iraq war, you are siding with Uwe Boll.
Tarquinn
Personally responsible for the decline of the American Dollar
posted 05-20-2008 06:28:25 PM
quote:
Maradon! thought about the meaning of life:
Just remember: If you oppose the Iraq war, you are siding with Uwe Boll.

If only I had known this five years ago.

~Never underestimate the power of a Dark Clown.
Nina
posted 05-20-2008 07:03:44 PM
As I've said every time Postal was mentioned, it's much, much better than Boll's other films. Which isn't to say a lot, granted.

It's funny, though not nearly as full of "important points" as he makes it out to be. It's a heavy-handed, crude and offensive satire, so if that's what you want to see, then it's excellent. It's no surprise it got so few screens in the USA, considering America and its frenzy of anti-terrorist zeal following 9-11 is the butt of many of the movie's jokes.

But then, it also mocks arabs, jews, whites, policemen, minorities, etc. A pure thrash comedy.

Uwe Boll, however, does take himself way too seriously.

Nina fucked around with this message on 05-20-2008 at 07:04 PM.

Maradon!
posted 05-20-2008 07:31:13 PM
Yeah, no way we'd show an antiwar film here in the states.

Well, besides stop loss, rendition, lions for lambs, and fahrenheit 9-11, just off the top of my head

It's got nothing to do with the fact that Boll's movies are big corn filled turds, no, I'm quite certain it's the anti-american content.

Callalron
Hires people with hooks
posted 05-20-2008 08:04:38 PM
quote:
Maradon! had this to say about Jimmy Carter:
I celebrate this idiotic man's suffering.

I believe that I've mentioned my personal policy of not deriving personal satisfaction at the misfortune of others, no matter how personally or professionally loathsome I may find them.

But in this case, I'm gonna give myself a mulligan just so I can roll around in the enjoyment of listening to his whiny, petulant self-pity.

Aaaaaah, that felt good.

Callalron
"When mankind finally discovers the center of the universe, a lot of people are going to be upset that it isn't them."
"If you give a man a fish he'll eat for a day. If you teach a man to fish he'll just go out and buy an ugly hat. But if you talk to a starving man about fish, then you've become a consultant."--Dogbert
Arvek, 41 Bounty Hunter
Vrook Lamar server
Skaw
posted 05-20-2008 10:42:32 PM
The fact that he wanted to put Postal up against Indiana Jones and believed he'd crush it is signs that he's gone over the deep end, rather than just being a retard like he normally is.
Khyron
Hello, my mushy friend...
posted 05-20-2008 10:56:55 PM
quote:
Skaw had this to say about Duck Tales:
The fact that he wanted to put Postal up against Indiana Jones and believed he'd crush it is signs that he's gone over the deep end, rather than just being a retard like he normally is.

He was below the deep end ages ago, when he stated proudly and publicly that he was the only genius in the business. Which, not counting his direct statements against Michael Bay and Eli Roth, means he considers himself above Spielberg, Lucas, Tarantino, Kubrick, Zemeckis, the Coen Brothers... Little things like 'box office success' and 'critical acclaim' don't factor into it.

quote:
and you are not getting it that you are only interested in movies like IRON MAN or HULK or KUNG FU PANDA or the MUMMY 3 because the studios spending 60 mio. $ in advertising to make you interested in NON INTERESTING movies.

Yes. Robert Downey Jr's performace had absolutely nothing whatsoever to do with the fact that I enjoyed Iron Man. I am so glad that Uwe Boll is around to show me the error of my ways!

Maradon!
posted 05-21-2008 12:32:47 AM
Where do people get this idea that advertising can hypnotize people into buying products that they don't really want?

Has anybody out there ever thought "hm man, this brand of string cheese tastes better, but the other brand had such a cool commercial..."

Maradon! fucked around with this message on 05-21-2008 at 12:33 AM.

Willias
Pancake
posted 05-21-2008 01:18:12 AM
quote:
Maradon! probably says this to all the girls:
Has anybody out there ever thought "hm man, this brand of string cheese tastes better, but the other brand had such a cool commercial..."

I don't think that's the way advertising is supposed to work. It's supposed to be "hm man, this brand of string cheese is pretty good, but I wonder if that other brand I've been hearing about is any better?"

It's more about getting your product out there. People who don't know you exist won't use your stuff.

Taeldian
Pancake
posted 05-21-2008 02:26:02 AM
I buy Listerine mouthwash because they have the most commercials.

This wasn't a conscious decision. It was something I realized after I'd been using their product for a long time.

Taeldian fucked around with this message on 05-21-2008 at 02:27 AM.

Greenlit
posted 05-21-2008 02:32:51 AM
I use Listerine because ACT doesn't often have the great buy-one-get-one-free deals that Listerine does.

Nothing else compares to those two.

Callalron
Hires people with hooks
posted 05-21-2008 03:37:21 AM
quote:
Vorago wrote, obviously thinking too hard:
Oh wow, hit up google out of curiosity...

Postal managed to snag all of FOUR screens in the entire United States for it's theatrical release


This sets up quite the conundrum for us. Are there four theater owners THAT fucking stupid in the whole country? Or if it's just one theater owner, how did someone that stupid get control of four screens?

Yes indeed, quite the poser.

Callalron
"When mankind finally discovers the center of the universe, a lot of people are going to be upset that it isn't them."
"If you give a man a fish he'll eat for a day. If you teach a man to fish he'll just go out and buy an ugly hat. But if you talk to a starving man about fish, then you've become a consultant."--Dogbert
Arvek, 41 Bounty Hunter
Vrook Lamar server
Rodent King
Stabbed in the Eye
posted 05-21-2008 11:10:17 AM
I use the Target Brand Mouthwash because it was $1 cheaper, next to Listerine on the rack and said: "Compare to Freshburst Listerine"

If there was a discount movie theater which showed the exact same movies but had hand-drawn/crayon-colored posters and ads around; I'd probably go to that one.

My inner child is bigger than my outer adult.
Naimah
In a Fire
posted 05-21-2008 11:35:36 AM
You see I buy the giant 2L bottles of listerene so I don't really care about the $1 difference that might exist. And that shit does wonders for your dental bill, doing the mouth wash and brushing regularly makes you pretty safe against caveties.
Tarquinn
Personally responsible for the decline of the American Dollar
posted 05-21-2008 12:06:45 PM
quote:
Maradon! had this to say about Pirotess:
Where do people get this idea that advertising can hypnotize people into buying products that they don't really want?

Has anybody out there ever thought "hm man, this brand of string cheese tastes better, but the other brand had such a cool commercial..."


Advertisement usually works via recognition. If confronted with two products of the same type, consumers most likely go for the one they have heard about.

Quoting myself from a 18 months old thread:

quote:
Tarquinn:
Creating the urge to own a product is just one of the functions of advertisements, the other, and perhaps more important one is to put the product into peoples' minds, that they are aware of it if they were not before, or to remind them of the product.

For example, people going to a supermarket to buy butter. If they don't have a certain brand in mind, they will most likely go for the one they have heard about before.


Tarquinn fucked around with this message on 05-21-2008 at 12:11 PM.

~Never underestimate the power of a Dark Clown.
Taeldian
Pancake
posted 05-21-2008 03:31:40 PM
quote:
Rodent King had this to say about Robocop:
I use the Target Brand Mouthwash because it was $1 cheaper, next to Listerine on the rack and said: "Compare to Freshburst Listerine"

If there was a discount movie theater which showed the exact same movies but had hand-drawn/crayon-colored posters and ads around; I'd probably go to that one.


You may be missing the point. I'm not saying that advertising makes a product better; I'm saying advertising works better than a lot of people like to think.

When I buy Listerine, I feel like I'm buying "the good stuff" in spite of the fact that I should probably know better. I've never seen anything showing that Listerine outperforms any other brand in any other way, but the commercials over the years have driven the idea that Listerine is the best into my mind.

A theater using home-made advertisements (assuming this were a real possibility, and I'm pretty sure it isn't) would be a shithole. Even if it were just as good or better than the standard theater, it would still be considered a shithole by just about everyone whether or not it was true.

Advertising is effective not only because it makes you aware of products, but also because it portrays the product as top-quality.

Maradon!
posted 05-21-2008 04:35:31 PM
quote:
Peanut butter ass Shaq Taeldian booooze lime pole over bench lick:
Advertising is effective not only because it makes you aware of products, but also because it portrays the product as top-quality.

This is absolutely true, however it assumes that the consumer completely lacks any other knowledge of the product. If all other things are equal, then yes a consumer will often buy the product with the most convincing advertising.

It's rarely the case that the consumer completely lacks any other knowledge of the product, though. In the hierarchy of consideration, personal experience and word of mouth recommendation are almost always foremost. Advertising can get a consumer to buy a product once, but personal experience builds brand loyalty, it leads to people buying products countless times.

In the case of movies, the advertising is more a free sample than a commercial, which in itself makes Boll's statement stupid.

The point of all this is that the consumer is ultimately in total control of what they consume, and no amount of advertising will change that for any worthwhile amount of time. Advertising is only very effective if it's for a quality product.

Maradon! fucked around with this message on 05-21-2008 at 04:37 PM.

Taeldian
Pancake
posted 05-21-2008 07:32:02 PM
quote:
Maradon!'s fortune cookie read:
This is absolutely true, however it assumes that the consumer completely lacks any other knowledge of the product. If all other things are equal, then yes a consumer will often buy the product with the most convincing advertising.

It's rarely the case that the consumer completely lacks any other knowledge of the product, though. In the hierarchy of consideration, personal experience and word of mouth recommendation are almost always foremost. Advertising can get a consumer to buy a product once, but personal experience builds brand loyalty, it leads to people buying products countless times.

In the case of movies, the advertising is more a free sample than a commercial, which in itself makes Boll's statement stupid.

The point of all this is that the consumer is ultimately in total control of what they consume, and no amount of advertising will change that for any worthwhile amount of time. Advertising is only very effective if it's for a quality product.


Fair enough.
Maradon!
posted 05-21-2008 08:35:56 PM
quote:
Peanut butter ass Shaq Taeldian booooze lime pole over bench lick:
Fair enough.

Then how the hell do you explain-

oh wait

Gadani
U
posted 05-22-2008 12:33:37 AM
quote:
Rodent King Model 2000 was programmed to say:
I use the Target Brand Mouthwash because it was $1 cheaper, next to Listerine on the rack and said: "Compare to Freshburst Listerine"

If there was a discount movie theater which showed the exact same movies but had hand-drawn/crayon-colored posters and ads around; I'd probably go to that one.


I will probably always buy the generic/store brand because, if you compare the active ingredients, they're the same.

EXACTLY THE SAME.

Same thing with generic medication.

Peter
Pancake
posted 05-22-2008 07:51:37 AM
quote:
Maradon! attempted to be funny by writing:
Where do people get this idea that advertising can hypnotize people into buying products that they don't really want?

Has anybody out there ever thought "hm man, this brand of string cheese tastes better, but the other brand had such a cool commercial..."


In regards to the motion picture industry, a large advertising blitz used to be good for buying a good opening weekend/week for even a mediocre movie, usually enough to pay for the advertising blitz. But, And I think it was posted here while back, With the advent of Cell phones that could Txt and have web connectivity, this strategy hasn't worked as well since if the movie totally bites, many people can post or message this fact while still in the movie. So rather than have 1-2 days for the word of mouth to get out, it's a matter of hours.


Though I think the greatest advertising success of late has been all this Angus beef malarkey, The council is really reaping the benefit from it, since if you took the same cut and grade of beef from a herford and an angus, unless you were told, you wouldn't notice any difference in taste.

Peter fucked around with this message on 05-22-2008 at 07:52 AM.

Taylen
Pancake
posted 05-22-2008 11:43:22 AM
quote:
Nobody really understood why Gadani wrote:
I will probably always buy the generic/store brand because, if you compare the active ingredients, they're the same.

EXACTLY THE SAME.

Same thing with generic medication.


Unfortunatly in the case of medication it's whats not the active ingredient that sometimes makes the brand name more important. This is not always the case but in some cases the additional ingredients put into a medication can affect the rate and manner of absorbtion causing the brand name to work better or more effeciently than the generic. Also I do know cases of people who are allergic to a non-active ingredient in the generic that doesn't exist in the brand name.

However I will agree that in almost all cases the generic is just as good as the brand name. Well aside from some foods where the brand name just plain tastes better.

"When correctly viewed, everything is lewd." - Tom Lehrer.
Sadomasochism: It's Fun!
Taylen Ashenbow
Rangers never run we mearly stratigically retreat.
Thats not a train thats a pull, my trains are always much bigger.
Gadani
U
posted 05-22-2008 12:06:56 PM
quote:
Taylen had this to say about Knight Rider:
Unfortunatly in the case of medication it's whats not the active ingredient that sometimes makes the brand name more important.

Right, which is why I said "active ingredient" and why we still keep brand name medication in stock

Vallo, the Second Coming
Pancake
posted 05-22-2008 12:20:37 PM
"We are just an advanced breed of monkeys on a minor planet of a very average star. But we can understand the Universe. That makes us something very special."
Wulfie
Pancake
posted 05-26-2008 08:18:10 PM
Uwe Boll is finishing last against listerine in his own thread, He's that path...wait, who are we talking about again?
The statistics on sanity are that one out of every four Americans is suffering from some form of mental illness. Think of your three best friends. If they are okay, then it's you.
-Rita Mae Brown
Khyron
Hello, my mushy friend...
posted 06-04-2008 08:56:59 AM
Poor Uwe. His film is so bad he can't even show it for free.

200 people walk out on their Postal free screening.

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