Then I saw the strangest thing.
She was eating while she was driving. What's that, you say? That's no big crime; everybody does it, right? But with chop sticks!!?
I mean, seriously. Eating (what I presume was) Chinese food, with chop sticks, while driving? What's next, hopping in the back seat with the kids to watch a DVD?
--Satan, quoted by John Milton
I learned as a young kid how to use chopsticks from the Korean wife of my dad's best friend. Quite a lady. Probably one my first crushes as a little kid. She introduced us to sushi before it was 
but I don't like fish cooked or otherwise.
What's really fun is teaching my little girls how to use them. They try so hard to be like Daddy and get a bit insulted when I just take one from them, stab a chicken puff, dip it in sweet and sour and hand it to them. I tell them that it's a perfectly acceptable way to learn to use them and that I started that way. They don't buy it... so I tell them to starve. My wife and I giggle a bit behind our hands when the finally put the chopsticks down and start using thier fingers. Hunger always wins out.
"Grandpa, why do you have a patch on your eye? Were you injured fighting pirates?"
"No, son, I was waving a pair of sharp sticks in front of my face while not paying attention to my driving."
"Wow."
--Satan, quoted by John Milton
quote:
And I was all like 'Oh yeah?' and Bloodsage was all like:
I'm quite good with chopsticks, too. . .but that's just insane. Explain that to your grandkids:"Grandpa, why do you have a patch on your eye? Were you injured fighting pirates?"
"No, son, I was waving a pair of sharp sticks in front of my face while not paying attention to my driving."
"Wow."
I laughed too damned hard at that.
I've only done it once and that was in sheer desperation as I hadn't eaten anything all day and had a deadline I needed to get done for work. I didn't get to really enjoy the meal as I was racing home from the Twin Cities after over a week there working in the main office. I was sick of fast food and wanted something tasty.
It is by caffeine alone I set my mind in motion. It is by the beans of Java the thoughts aquire speed, the teeth acquire stains, the stains become a warning. It is by caffeine alone I set my mind in motion.
I think I'd rather be behind the chopstick driver.
quote:
Vorbis Model 2000 was programmed to say:
At work the other day there was a green Mustang. My friend and I walked right past it on our way to clock out. Something caught my eye, so I looked (while still walking) into the car. Sitting in the driver's cupholder was a 22ounce can of Steel Reserve--a 8.1% alcohol malt beverage.I think I'd rather be behind the chopstick driver.
My old man taught me and my brothers the correct way to toss a beer can out the window so it will fly strait into the truck bed.
quote:
Peter had this to say about Matthew Broderick:
My old man taught me and my brothers the correct way to toss a beer can out the window so it will fly strait into the truck bed.
This thread now has TWO surprisingly funny posts.
quote:
Vorbis had this to say about Matthew Broderick:
At work the other day there was a green Mustang. My friend and I walked right past it on our way to clock out. Something caught my eye, so I looked (while still walking) into the car. Sitting in the driver's cupholder was a 22ounce can of Steel Reserve--a 8.1% alcohol malt beverage.I think I'd rather be behind the chopstick driver.
Ew. Steel. Cheap, nasty stuff.
Though I have carried out a few conversations on my cellphone while driving. It's rather interesting making a turn, shifting, and talking on the phone all at once. Please note however, that I've never attempted, nor do I plan on attempting, this in heavy traffic. It was all after 10pm on my drive home from work. Which I know doesn't really excuse the fact, but hey.
I'm not really sure what kind of driver I will be, but my parents make me really nervous when I'm driving.
quote:
ACES! Another post by Manticore:
I have to drive with a Parent in the car for another two monthsI'm not really sure what kind of driver I will be, but my parents make me really nervous when I'm driving.
Heh. I make my mom really nervous when she rides with me.
I've never put on my lip gloss while driving (I usually wait until I'm at a red light). But I am guilty of opening packs of crackers, drinks, or anything else my son needs help with whilst on the road. I don't do it in high traffic or anything, though, and don't plan on starting.
I still think those on their cell phones while driving are the worst. Last week I was almost run off the road going into downtown Indy because some assmunch in a huge truck was not only on his cell phone (right hand) but was trying to hold a cup of coffee and steer (with the left). 
quote:Where the hell do you find innocent with blood in them?
When they turned on the Infinite Improbability Drive, Pvednes stammered,
My eco-friendly biodegradable plastic car is now powered by the blood of the innocent. It's slightly cheaper.
Otherwise it's just finger foods and drinks that I'll sneak in while driving.
Lyinar Ka`Bael, Piney Fresh Druidess - Luclin
I kept asking him why he didn't just get up 15 minutes earlier, but he insisted he was safe and knew what he was doing.
Because driving with your knees is oh so safe.
look out central florida ec'ers! I'm gonna get you!
) that people like me who are alert, capable, and have reasonably well-maneuvering vehicles are limited to such low highway speeds.Thank you, People Who Ruin It For Everyone Else! You're this week's winner!
I'll pull into the parking lot at BK to finish my meal.
Fuck. Now I'm hungry for a cheeseburger, some O-rings and a large vanilla shake.
I tend to speed 5-10, depending on the road and traffic.
quote:
From the book of Lyinar Ka`Bael, chapter 3, verse 16:
Back in HS, I would get out of Brain Game practice, hit Taco Hell, and eat tacos with one hand on the way back for band practice.Otherwise it's just finger foods and drinks that I'll sneak in while driving.
I have a filthy, filthy mind.
sigpic courtesy of This Guy, original modified by me
quote:
When the babel fish was in place, it was apparent Delphi Aegis said:
Fuck. Now I'm hungry for a cheeseburger, some O-rings and a large vanilla shake.
*giggles immaturely* You said o-rings!
--Satan, quoted by John Milton
quote:
Bloodsage thought this was the Ricky Martin Fan Club Forum and wrote:
Wow, looks like a lot of people really "love" their manual transmissions!
I know I sure do. Snugglits fucked around with this message on 09-04-2005 at 05:34 PM.
sigpic courtesy of This Guy, original modified by me
quote:
Bloodsage was listening to Cher while typing:
Wow, looks like a lot of people really "love" their manual transmissions!
The stick vibrates under acceleration.
quote:
When the babel fish was in place, it was apparent Kaglaaz How'ler said:
The stick vibrates under acceleration.
Especially if you have a diesel
*adjusts her halo* Xyrra fucked around with this message on 09-06-2005 at 08:56 PM.
Until I had found Advance Wars DS, I had been playing PS2 games during stop lights on a 7 inch screen I keep illegally mounted on the passenger-side dash board. During longer trips I've been known to put in DVD's to play, hooking up the PS2 to my car's speaker system to get a surround sound effect. (Normally drink/cel-phones are in use at these times too, again driving with my knees) So far I've had no serious accidents, (Two fender benders in a parking lot, neither my fault as my car was parked at the time.) I just think that since I'm under 21, male, unmarried, and paying the highest possible car insurance rates my agency has to offer to people with spotless driving records; I'll drive how I want to.
Oh, I'm gonna get a yelling-at for that one! 
quote:
Channeling the spirit of Sherlock Holmes, Rodent King absently fondled Watson and proclaimed:
A bunch of stupid shit.
You are a fucking idiot. Bloodsage fucked around with this message on 09-07-2005 at 01:03 AM.
--Satan, quoted by John Milton
quote:
Rodent King attempted to be funny by writing:
-retard speak-
Get out of my state.
quote:
Bloodsage's fortune cookie read:
You are a fucking idiot.
How is it wrong if I put the gameboy/controller down or pause the movie while driving? 
quote:
Verily, the chocolate bunny rabits doth run and play while Rodent King gently hums:
How is it wrong if I put the gameboy/controller down or pause the movie while driving?
Well, let's see: there's the driving with knees stupidity, there's the playing videogames while driving stupidity (sorry, dipshit, but, "I only do it at stop lights," doesn't absolve you from the need to pay attention to what the hell you're doing), and there's also the lovely, "I pay high insurance rates, so I can be stupid if I want," idiocy.
Take your pick.
Not paying attention while you're driving is fucking stupid. Keep it up and you'll kill yourself or someone else some day. The second one would really be a shame. Bloodsage fucked around with this message on 09-07-2005 at 01:13 AM.
--Satan, quoted by John Milton
quote:
From the book of Bloodsage, chapter 3, verse 16:
Well, let's see: there's the driving with knees stupidity, there's the playing videogames while driving stupidity (sorry, dipshit, but, "I only do it at stop lights," doesn't absolve you from the need to pay attention to what the hell you're doing), and there's also the lovely, "I pay high insurance rates, so I can be stupid if I want," idiocy.Take your pick.
Not paying attention while you're driving is fucking stupid. Keep it up and you'll kill yourself or someone else some day. The second one would really be a shame.
How often do you make huge wheel rotations while driving on a straight road? I can't make turns using my knees, so small adjustments on straight roads doesn't seem too complicated for my knees to handle. What's the worst that could happen if I take a turn on my gameboy or something while stopping at a stoplight? The only thing I can think of is missing the light turning green, and making the people (If any) behind me a few moments late. The insurance rate thing is my outlook I guess however stupid it may be, I'm just bitter about that.
