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Topic: The next terrorist attack: Zombies!
Zaza
I don't give a damn.
posted 03-01-2005 04:17:11 AM
I thought this little gem was amazingly hilarious.

quote:
CLARK COUNTY
Student Arrested For Terroristic Threatening Says Incident A Misunderstanding
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A George Rogers Clark High School junior arrested Tuesday for making terrorist threats told LEX 18 News Thursday that the "writings" that got him arrested are being taken out of context.

Winchester police say William Poole, 18, was taken into custody Tuesday morning. Investigators say they discovered materials at Poole's home that outline possible acts of violence aimed at students, teachers, and police.

Poole told LEX 18 that the whole incident is a big misunderstanding. He claims that what his grandparents found in his journal and turned into police was a short story he wrote for English class.

"My story is based on fiction," said Poole, who faces a second-degree felony terrorist threatening charge. "It's a fake story. I made it up. I've been working on one of my short stories, (and) the short story they found was about zombies. Yes, it did say a high school. It was about a high school over ran by zombies."

Even so, police say the nature of the story makes it a felony. "Anytime you make any threat or possess matter involving a school or function it's a felony in the state of Kentucky," said Winchester Police detective Steven Caudill.

Poole disputes that he was threatening anyone.

"It didn't mention nobody who lives in Clark County, didn't mention (George Rogers Clark High School), didn't mention no principal or cops, nothing,"
said Poole. "Half the people at high school know me. They know I'm not that stupid, that crazy."

On Thursday, a judge raised Poole's bond from one to five thousand dollars after prosecutors requested it, citing the seriousness of the charge.

Poole is being held at the Clark County Detention Center.


Not ONLY is it a thought crime, but also... just... are they seriously thinking that he is plotting to attack his high school with an army of the undead?

Zaza fucked around with this message on 03-01-2005 at 04:17 AM.

Tarquinn
Personally responsible for the decline of the American Dollar
posted 03-01-2005 04:25:01 AM
W... eh...

...

I'm speechless...

~Never underestimate the power of a Dark Clown.
Tristan
Vidi, vici, veni.
Nae's Stooge
posted 03-01-2005 04:29:14 AM
You have got to be fucking kidding...
Veni, vidi, vici
Zaza
I don't give a damn.
posted 03-01-2005 04:32:46 AM
Personally, I just wish they would take bunkering up on dispel magic scrolls as seriously, in case there's a terrorist attack using lightning bolt.
Pvednes
Lynched
posted 03-01-2005 04:52:46 AM
quote:
ACES! Another post by Zaza:
I thought this little gem was amazingly hilarious.

Not ONLY is it a thought crime, but also... just... are they seriously thinking that he is plotting to attack his high school with an army of the undead?


But hey, Thoughtcrime is the only crime that matters.

Ja'Deth Issar Ka'bael
I posted in a title changing thread.
posted 03-01-2005 08:05:59 AM
On one hand, I'm glad they're protecting me from teenagers with zombies...

On the other hand...WHAT THE FUCK, YO*


*phrase is property copyrighted by Pesco. all rights reserved. pants pants pantsy pants

Lyinar's sweetie and don't you forget it!*
"All those moments will be lost in time, like tears in rain. Time to die. -Roy Batty
*Also Lyinar's attack panda

sigpic courtesy of This Guy, original modified by me

Bajah
Thooooooor
posted 03-01-2005 10:36:56 AM
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH

Man, I'm in tears. This kid deserves some fame for this. Does Kentucky ban every teen horror movie, too?

Blindy.
Suicide (Also: Gay.)
posted 03-01-2005 10:39:41 AM
It seems pretty obvious that the story was about him storming a highschool filled with zombies and killing them all. I could see how this might be considered a threat, but this whole thing is freaking rediculous.
JooJooFlop
Hungry Hungry Hippo
posted 03-01-2005 10:51:30 AM
Hey, zombies are people too.
I don't know how to be sexy. If I catch a girl looking at me and our eyes lock, I panic and open mine wider. Then I lick my lips and rub my genitals. And mouth the words "You're dead."
Manticore
Not Much Fun Anymore
posted 03-01-2005 10:59:30 AM
quote:
JooJooFlop enlisted the help of an infinite number of monkeys to write:
Hey, zombies are people too.

DEAD people. We dont go arresting graveyards for secret meetings... involving death.

"France tried to turtle, but Hitler did a tank rush before they were ready. Just shows how horribly unbalanced real life is. They should release a patch."
JooJooFlop
Hungry Hungry Hippo
posted 03-01-2005 11:02:59 AM
quote:
Manticore had this to say about the Spice Girls:
DEAD people. We dont go arresting graveyards for secret meetings... involving death.

Nah, they're good people. The authorities know that. It's just a few bad apples that indescriminantly cause massive zombie plagues, and the media harps on those as if it happens all the time so they get a bad rep with the ignorant masses.

Like you. Asshole.

I don't know how to be sexy. If I catch a girl looking at me and our eyes lock, I panic and open mine wider. Then I lick my lips and rub my genitals. And mouth the words "You're dead."
Dr. Gee
Say it Loud, Say it Plowed!
posted 03-01-2005 11:17:16 AM
Reactions like this are fairly standard in US public schools these days, so i don't see what's too shocking about it.

Retarded, yes. Shocking or unexpected? No.

Manticore
Not Much Fun Anymore
posted 03-01-2005 11:20:07 AM
quote:
JooJooFlop had this to say about (_|_):
Nah, they're good people. The authorities know that. It's just a few bad apples that indescriminantly cause massive zombie plagues, and the media harps on those as if it happens all the time so they get a bad rep with the ignorant masses.

Like you. Asshole.


Fine fine, but you will never see a zombie in office, you hear me? Never.

"France tried to turtle, but Hitler did a tank rush before they were ready. Just shows how horribly unbalanced real life is. They should release a patch."
Kaglaaz How'ler
Pancake
posted 03-01-2005 11:47:27 AM
* a telephone rings, footsteps are heard approaching the phone, a male voice is heard saying, "Hello"

The only thing heard on the other end of the phone is a single word...*

MINDCRIME

http://www.bloodfin.net
Willias
Pancake
posted 03-01-2005 03:12:20 PM
Zagg mentioned this to me this morning. Suprised to see that it happened in my state. Though, not my county. Jefferson County is like a completely different state. We ridicule those who live in other counties of Kentucky.

All I have to say is this: What the fuck?

This is almost as bad as goth kids in my school drinking each others blood and calling themselves Daywalkers.

I'll probably be printing this out though, because my Government/Politics/Economy teacher gets a kick out of reading stuff like this.

Willias
Pancake
posted 03-01-2005 03:17:05 PM
quote:
Bajah stopped staring at Deedlit long enough to write:
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH

Man, I'm in tears. This kid deserves some fame for this. Does Kentucky ban every teen horror movie, too?


This joke sucks. >:(

Seriously though, crimerate has skyrocketed in Kentucky lately. Especially violent crimes around schools.

Examples:
-Earlier this year, there was a group of kids planning to attack certain kids in the building with guns.
-Last year, same thing almost happened near the end of the school year.
-There was a stabbing in my middle school, apparently some psycho kid who had an obsession with knives flipped out on a random student.
-There was a gun fight a short distance away from a high school not too long ago.
-Etc.

Faelynn LeAndris
Lusty busty redheaded wood elf with sharp claws
posted 03-01-2005 05:55:50 PM
quote:
Kaglaaz How'ler got all f'ed up on Angel Dust and wrote:
* a telephone rings, footsteps are heard approaching the phone, a male voice is heard saying, "Hello"

The only thing heard on the other end of the phone is a single word...*

MINDCRIME


I remember now.... I don't remember yesterday... I just remember doing... Doing what they told me... told me... told me...


My LAUNCHCast Station
"Respect the Forest, Fear the Ranger"
I got lost for an hour and became god.
Kaglaaz How'ler
Pancake
posted 03-01-2005 07:02:33 PM
quote:
Faelynn LeAndris wrote, obviously thinking too hard:
I remember now.... I don't remember yesterday... I just remember doing... Doing what they told me... told me... told me...

Finally someone knows what I'm talking about

http://www.bloodfin.net
Kegwen
Sonyfag
posted 03-01-2005 07:30:57 PM
quote:
Kaglaaz How'ler had this to say about Punky Brewster:
Finally someone knows what I'm talking about

I didn't like that album too much assuming you're talking about Queensryche

I saw this story on fark. Wow. Just wow.

Peter
Pancake
posted 03-01-2005 07:50:41 PM
quote:
JooJooFlop had this to say about the Spice Girls:
Hey, zombies are people too.

The Only Good Zombie is a Dead Zombie.....Err Deader Zombie.

Gunslinger Moogle
No longer a gimmick
posted 03-01-2005 11:14:13 PM
quote:
Everyone wondered WTF when Willias wrote:
All I have to say is this: What the fuck?

This is almost as bad as goth kids in my school drinking each others blood and calling themselves Daywalkers.


To your what the fuck, a what the fuck, sirrah.

How is writing a story anywhere near as bad as drinking blood?




moogle is the 3241727861th binary digit of pi

Disclaimer: I'm just kidding, I love all living things.
The fastest draw in the Crest.
"The Internet is MY critical thinking course." -Maradon
"Gambling for the husband, an abortion for the wife and fireworks for the kids they chose to keep? Fuck you, Disneyland. The Pine Ridge Indian Reservation is the happiest place on Earth." -JooJooFlop

Rodent King
Stabbed in the Eye
posted 03-01-2005 11:22:32 PM
quote:
Gunslinger Moogle had this to say about Pirotess:
To your what the fuck, a what the fuck, sirrah.

How is writing a story anywhere near as bad as drinking blood?


The story is clearly painting a negative stereotype on the living impaired. Drinking blood is just a childish phase.

My inner child is bigger than my outer adult.
Razor
posted 03-01-2005 11:30:21 PM
for christ's sake.... these people need to get their asses out of the stone age....
Astronomy is a passion...
Engineering is a love...
My job isn't a job, it's my career, and I love every minute of it: Observatory Superintendent
Big Easy
Pancake
posted 03-02-2005 01:42:37 AM
quote:
Especially violent crimes around schools.

Hey, kids need more encouragement to take up exercise. Why not take up a defensive sport, like track? And what better motivator than a ball of lead flying at 500 fps?

I say it's good for 'em!

"A little rebellion now and then is a good thing." -- Thomas Jefferson
"Unbelievably, a goldfish can kill a gorilla. However, it does require a substantial element of surprise." -- George Carlin
"Beer is proof that God loves us and wants us to be happy." -- Benjamin Franklin
"I finally figured out what e-mail is for. It's for communicating with people you'd rather not talk to." -- Also George Carlin
"The best lack all conviction, while the worst
Are full of passionate intensity." -- "The Second Coming" by Wm. Butler Yeats
`Doc
Cold in an Alley
posted 03-02-2005 07:51:11 AM
quote:
Big Easy really knows where their towel is...
Hey, kids need more encouragement to take up exercise. Why not take up a defensive sport, like track? And what better motivator than a ball of lead flying at 500 fps?

I say it's good for 'em!


Somehow a ball of anything moving at 500 frames per second doesn't seem like much of a motivator to go outside.
Base eight is just like base ten, really... if you're missing two fingers. - Tom Lehrer
There are people in this world who do not love their fellow human beings, and I hate people like that! - Tom Lehrer
I want to be a race car passenger; just a guy who bugs the driver. "Say man, can I turn on the radio? You should slow down. Why do we gotta keep going in circles? Can I put my feet out the window? Man, you really like Tide..." - Mitch Hedberg
Please keep your arms, legs, heads, tails, tentacles, pseudopods, wings, and/or other limb-like structures inside the ride at all times.
Please submit all questions, inquests, and/or inquiries, in triplicate, to the Department of Redundancy Department, Division for the Management of Division Management Divisions.

Willias
Pancake
posted 03-02-2005 09:43:47 AM
quote:
Gunslinger Moogle had this to say about (_|_):
To your what the fuck, a what the fuck, sirrah.

How is writing a story anywhere near as bad as drinking blood?


Hmm. Good point.

I think when I typed that though I meant "Almost as stupid" (and when I mean almost as stupid, I'm talking about the kid being arrested) but I didn't type that. Yeah.


Anyways, the whole "Daywalker" thing has become a big joke at our school. Apparently there were goth kids drinking each others blood in the bathroom, and were caught doing so. When one of them was confronted in the office on why the hell they were doing it, he said that they were Daywalkers and that there were more like them.

Yeah, they got suspended and the story went around the school quick. Now its pretty much a big joke among students in the senior class.

Willias fucked around with this message on 03-02-2005 at 09:44 AM.

Big Easy
Pancake
posted 03-02-2005 02:47:51 PM
quote:
`Doc enlisted the help of an infinite number of monkeys to write:
Somehow a ball of anything moving at 500 frames per second doesn't seem like much of a motivator to go outside.

Ah, but there's so many more chance for them to miss when you're outside, as opposed to in a hallway or classroom. I may not be a sprinter, but I'd still prefer the chance to head for the bushes or get a few trees between me and any flying projectiles.

"A little rebellion now and then is a good thing." -- Thomas Jefferson
"Unbelievably, a goldfish can kill a gorilla. However, it does require a substantial element of surprise." -- George Carlin
"Beer is proof that God loves us and wants us to be happy." -- Benjamin Franklin
"I finally figured out what e-mail is for. It's for communicating with people you'd rather not talk to." -- Also George Carlin
"The best lack all conviction, while the worst
Are full of passionate intensity." -- "The Second Coming" by Wm. Butler Yeats
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