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Author
Topic: HAPPY BIRTHDAY!!
Jajahotep
Vader to Deth's Obi-wan
posted 08-20-2004 07:35:09 AM
to Falanana and Alaan!

Jajahotep fucked around with this message on 08-20-2004 at 07:35 AM.

Vise the Stompy
Title now 100% ass free!
posted 08-20-2004 08:18:19 AM
Happy BirthDay you two!
Trillee
I <3 My Deviant
posted 08-20-2004 11:51:50 AM
*softshoe dances*

Birthday, it's your birthday! cha cha... Birhtday, it's your birthday!

Katrinity
Cookie Goddess!
posted 08-20-2004 12:17:47 PM
Happy Birthday, Falllllaaaallaaaallla and Alaan! ^.^

<sets out cookies>

Cookie Goddess Supreme
Furry Kitsune of Power!
Pouncer of the 12th degree!
"Cxularath ftombn gonoragh pv'iornw hqxoxon targh!"
Translated: "Sell your soul for a cookie?"
MorbId
Pancake
posted 08-20-2004 12:25:29 PM
Your names have eight "A"s between them. Consonants seem like an appropriate gift.

Happy birthday, both of you.

Alaan
posted 08-20-2004 12:29:05 PM
Curses! Our plot to take over the alphabet has been thwarted.

Anyway! Thanks for all the happy birthdays.

Mr. Gainsborough
posted 08-20-2004 12:40:04 PM
Happy Birthday!!
Naota Nandaba
Don't ask me about any goddamned bannings!
posted 08-20-2004 12:42:24 PM
quote:
MorbId said this about your mom:
Your names have eight "A"s between them. Consonants seem like an appropriate gift.

Happy birthday, both of you.


Falaanla

Nothing amazing happens here.
Only the ordinary.
Alaan
posted 08-20-2004 12:44:56 PM
quote:
Naota Nandaba Model 2000 was programmed to say:
Falaanla


That really is a really freaking strange coincidence.

Sean
posted 08-20-2004 12:45:48 PM
These threads are all blatant false advertising.

I should start doing that.

A Kansas City Shuffle is when everybody looks right, you go left.

It's not something people hear about.

Jajahotep
Vader to Deth's Obi-wan
posted 08-20-2004 01:19:57 PM
Decided instead of googling porn, I'd write a nice lil story instead (sorry Alaan, it's really for Fal).

Anywhoosle, I'll just spoiler tag it for those who wish not to read it.

Brian and the Co-ed
It was an a hot and humid late summer day on campus Brian noted as he got of his car in front of his apartment building. He was lucky enough to be able to start moving in a day before the rest of the students. The campus was nearly empty and only a few students could be seen in the apartment building. Hefting his computer from the trunk of his car, Brian carried it up the two flights of stairs to his home for the next two semesters.

He left the door open as he carried the computer inside and placed it on the kitchen counter for the time being. He looked around the empty apartment, nodding with satisfaction as he envisioned what it would look like once his other three roommates moved in. Brian left the apartment again and continued to move load after load of personal items up the stairs to the apartment. After what seemed like forever, but was only about three hours, Brian made the last trip up the steps with a box of clothing, cursing under his breath as his calf muscles ached from the aerobic exercise. Brian struggled with the box as he made his way down the corridor to his apartment and almost knocked over another student who was hovering around his open door.

“I didn’t mean to be nosy,” The petite fiery red head said, her pale cheeks flushing as she looked up at Brian. “There aren’t many other students here right now, and none on this floor, save for you, and me.”

“It’s no problem,” Brian said as he shifted the box on his arms. The girl stepped out of his way and Brian gratefully went into his apartment and put the heavy box down.

“I’m your new neighbor, Krista.” She offered a hand to Brian. He shook her small hand and turned away toward the kitchen and wiped the sweat off his brow.

“Brian,” he replied as he wiped at his face with the hem of his shirt. “Are you new here? I don’t think I’ve seen you around before.”

“Yes, I’m a freshman. I’m sharing an apartment with my older sister and a couple of friends.” She smiled, her sparkling green eyes glancing around the apartment.

“Sounds a little like my story, except I’m the older sibling.” He smiled nervously.

“Are you any good with computers?” She asked noting the expensive electronic equipment strewn across the kitchen counter tops.

“Well, err, I guess you could say that.” Brian replied.

“Oh do you think you could come over to my apartment and help me set up my stuff? I have no idea which cord goes where.” She flustered.

“I don’t know,” Brian started. He was hot and sweaty with a thin layer of dirt on his skin. He desperately wanted to shower and set up his bedroom. He ran one of his thick hands along the back of his neck, glancing from his computer equipment to the freshman. It wasn’t every day a pretty girl asked for his help. And he could always use a new friend. “Well, sure, I can help you out.” Krista smiled.

“Awesome. I really appreciate it.” She said as she headed out of Brian’s apartment and turned to the left to head to her own. Brian sighed and followed behind her, locking the apartment as he left. “You really know what you’re doing.” Krista said as she placed a glass of soda near where Brian sat busily working on her computer. It was an hour later, and what he thought was going to be a major ordeal turned out to be simple to fix.

“Thanks,” Brian said before sipping from the glass. He quickly returned to hooking up her stereo equipment in her bedroom, almost finished with the task. In the distance thunder rumbled as a storm pressed close to the college town. Brian worked silently for a few more minutes before sitting back triumphantly. “All finished.” He declared.

“Should we test it out? Or wait?” Krista asked from the bedroom window where she was watching splatters of rain start to fall to the ground.

“Sure, we can try everything out.” Brian replied as he flipped on her machine and waited for it to load. Before he was able to connect to the Internet a bright flash of lightning cut through the cloudy sky followed close behind by crackling thunder. The power flickered once before going out completely. “Fuck.” Brian muttered under his breath.

“Oh great!” Krista whined. Brian felt her push past her and for a second he could smell the sweet vanilla scent of her perfume. He listened intently as she stumbled out of the bedroom and disappeared down the near dark hallway. A few minutes later she returned with a two small, lit candle in her hands. “It’s the only ones I could find,” she reported.

“It’s alright. I’m sure the power will come on eventually.” Brian said as he looked around the shadowy room. “I should probably go.”

“Why?” Krista asked nervously. “I mean, you don’t have power either. And unless you have a stock of candles over there, you won’t be able to see anything. At least here you have me.” Brian arched his eyebrows and stared at the girl. “To talk to,” she added.

“Oh, right. Yeah okay, I’ll stay.” Brian said noting that the apartment was becoming quite warmer since the air conditioning was knocked out with the power. He moved to the window and quickly opened it, sighing softly as a cool breeze blew into the room. Krista moved the candles out of the way of the window before sitting on her bed. Brian stared at her, watching how her little white t-shirt was becoming moist with sweat and clinging to her breasts.

“I can’t believe how hot it is.” She finally stated catching Brian staring at her. Brian nodded. The sweat was beading on his forehead again as they sat in near darkness.

“Hey, can I use your shower?” He asked as he wiped at the beaded sweat.

“Sure,” Krista replied as she jerked into a standing position. She picked up the candle from her dresser and presented it to Brian. “Here, take this. I’d hate for you to hurt yourself in there.” She said with a smile. Brian accepted the candle and quickly left the bedroom.

He closed the bathroom door and leaned against it heavily and sighed. The bathroom was even warmer than the bedroom since there was no window but he didn’t care. She had caught him staring at her and he knew she’d think he was a creep.

“Way to go on being a pervert,” Brian muttered to himself as he pushed away from the door and placed the candle safely on the bathroom counter. He turned on the shower and began to remove his clothes. Brian adjusted the temperature of the shower and finally climbed into the cool water. He gasped as the cold droplets hit his hot body but relaxed as he became accustomed to the water.

Brian plucked the shampoo bottle from its holder and opened it. The same scent he had smelled on Krista overwhelmed his senses. He closed his eyes and smiled as he sniffed the shampoo. “Mmm,” he breathed.

“Enjoying yourself?” Krista asked from the other side of the curtain. Brian dropped the shampoo bottle and turned to face the fish covered shower curtain.

“What are you doing in here?” He stuttered.

“I was hot too.” She said pulling the shower curtain open some of the way. Brian gasped. Krista was completely naked. He tried to force his eyes to stay focused on hers but he couldn’t resist taking in her appearance. She had nice sized breasts, probably a C cup he figured, and a nice tanned tummy. Her thighs were round and spreading from between her legs he saw a small triangle patch of dark pubic hair. “Do you mind if I join you?” She asked.

“I, you, well I will finish and then you can get in,” Brian stuttered again, pulling some of the shower curtain to cover his growing manhood. Krista didn’t listen and instead she hopped into the shower beside him. Brian stared at her, his mouth wide, as the beautiful vixen eased her way past him, pausing long enough to rub her moistened body against his, before standing underneath the shower spray.

Brian swallowed hard as he watched Krista tilt her head back into the shower allowing the water to soak her coppery tresses. She picked up a bar of soap from the side of the tub and began to lather it in her hands. She rubbed the soap over her neck and shoulders before spending careful attention to her breasts and hardening nipples. She raised her eyes in the semi-darkness and smiled toward Brian.

“Can you help me with my back?” She asked in a too innocent tone, her hand outreached with the soap toward Brian. Brian attempted to speak but no words could be formed. Instead he took the offered soap in his hand and smiled weakly. Krista smiled too and turned her back to him.

Brian gasped as he stared at her firm buttocks before he forced himself to pay attention to the task at hand. He lathered up the soap and began to massage the suds into her back. She sighed pleasantly at his touch and pressed her hands to the shower wall to brace herself.

“That feels so good, Brian,” she said as she closed her eyes again. Brian blushed as he continued to wash her back, moving slowly down her back towards her ass. After working up enough lather he began to rub her skin with just his hands. He moved his fingers from her hips up her sides and down again. Brian became daring and slid his fingertips along her breasts. Krista gasped and pushed her ass back into Brian’s hips; pleased to feel he was quite aroused. “Don’t stop,” she breathed as she wriggled her ass against his thighs, smiling. Brian swallowed hard and with shaking hands began to rub his fingertips over her hardened nipples. She moaned an encouraging response to his touch and arched her back. Brian enjoyed touching her body and wanted desperately to go further, but the storm was overhead and he knew it wasn’t safe to stay in the shower. Plus there was a nagging fact that he was still a virgin and had all intentions on staying one until later.

“We better get out,” Brian said after a crack of thunder echoed. Krista opened her eyes and nodded as she turned off the water before climbing out of the shower. Brian sighed softly, relieved, and stepped out too.

“We can continue this in my bedroom,” She offered in a husky tone.

“No, I can’t,” he stammered. “I, I’m a virgin and I want to wait,” he blushed at his own words feeling foolish to turn down a hot little number like Krista.

“Oh but it’s so fun,” Krista said smiling. “Let me prove it to you.” She added and before Brian had the chance to protest she kneeled before him and began to suck on his hard cock. Brian gasped in shock and pleasure as she wrapped her small mouth around his thick hard on and began to rhythmically suck and lick his member.

He gripped the corner of the wall for stability and let out a moan. She twirled her tongue around the tip of his dick before plunging it down the length of his shaft. Brian wrapped his fingers in her damp hair and held her head as she happily, and apparently hungrily, lapped at his cock. She continued her sucking and licking for what Brian could only guess to be an eternity but soon stopped and licked her lips. She stood up, a hand wrapped around his throbbing cock, and smiled.

“Fuck me Brian.” She begged. She reached into a drawer and pulled a condom out and showed it to him. “Please!” Brian was so turned on he couldn’t utter a word let alone shake his head ‘no’. She unwrapped the condom and slid it onto his dick then turned to face the mirror over the counter.

Nervously Brian entered the hot freshman, amazed at how tight, yet inviting he found her to be. He rocked slowly at first, wanting to enjoy his first sexual experience for as long as possible. Brian placed his hands on her hips, holding her firmly in place as he slid into her dripping fuckhole. With each inward thrust he pushed a bit further. Krista moaned delightfully and squirmed against Brian, deepening his thrusts. He moved his hands from her hips and cupped her bouncing tits as he rocked his hips back and forth. She arched her back and rolled her head to the side and moaned loudly. Brian leaned in and kissed her lips feverishly as he twisted her nipples and crammed his dick roughly into her pussy.

They continued their fucking as the storm over them raged on. Brian could feel his orgasm building and knew it wouldn’t be long before he came. He also could feel Krista’s tight little snatch quivering and knew she was close too. Brian pressed his hairy chest to her back, pinning her tight to the counter top and began to quicken his pace. Krista whimpered and twisted beneath him, groaning from pleasure. The power flickered on and Brian met her eyes in the mirror just as they both began to orgasm. Brian grunted as he started to come and held onto Krista’s hips tightly as she bucked against him with her own orgasm. He kissed her shoulders and the back of her neck as his heartbeat pounded in his ears.

“That was some welcome to campus,” Krista whispered with a sly smile. Brian chuckled.

The End

*whistles innocently as she walks away*

Lechium
With no one to ever know
posted 08-20-2004 01:38:28 PM
Happy birthday Fal and Alaan! Hope you get everything you wanted!
"The MP checkpoint is not an Imperial Stormtrooper roadblock, so I should not tell them "You don't need to see my identification, these are not the droids you are looking for."
Azymyth
Not gay; just weird
posted 08-20-2004 01:55:53 PM
You're naughty, Jaja.
I suffer from CRS: Can't Remember Shit.

Sig pic done by the very talented SJen!

KaLourin
Illanae's Stooge!
posted 08-20-2004 01:57:22 PM
happy birthday you two
Dont make me slap you so hard your bucket spins around, and around,and stops sideways,thus confusing you, and making you run about London wearing your bucket, a g-string, and carrying a stick,smacking the ground while yelling "MAGICALLY DELICIOUS! MAGICALLY FUCKING DELICIOUS!"- {Tal} to Mortious
Hebrew 9:3- 'And the Lord said unto me, "Dude, there isn't a K in covenant."' - Snoota

This beer drops trou and fucks your mouth with pure hoppy goodness. - Karnaj
Azymyth
Not gay; just weird
posted 08-20-2004 02:08:27 PM
Oh yes, and happy birthday, studs.
I suffer from CRS: Can't Remember Shit.

Sig pic done by the very talented SJen!

Janus.
I am not a woman
posted 08-20-2004 03:19:58 PM
Yaaaaaaaaay Happy Birthday and.....stuff...yaaaaaaay.
Jajahotep
Vader to Deth's Obi-wan
posted 08-20-2004 04:23:10 PM
quote:
This one time, at Azymyth camp:
You're naughty, Jaja.

I was being good! I swear!

Sakkra
Office Linebacker
posted 08-20-2004 04:24:30 PM
quote:
This one time, at Jajahotep camp:
I was being good! I swear!

Why must you turn this thread into a den of LIES?!

Falaanla Marr
I AM HOT CHIX
posted 08-20-2004 04:43:00 PM
quote:
There was much rejoicing when Jajahotep said this:
I was being good! I swear!

Mightion Defensor
posted 08-20-2004 10:43:22 PM
Happy birthday, Brian(2) and whatever Alaan's name is...
Random Insanity Generator
Condom Ninja El Supremo
posted 08-21-2004 11:27:33 AM
quote:
ACES! Another post by Mightion Defensor:
Happy birthday, Brian(2) and whatever Alaan's name is...

Um. He's Brian(3), Brian`. I'm Brian(2)...

At least I think I am... he's supposed to be the younger thief of name...

* NullDevice kicks the server. "Floggings will continue until processing power improves!"
-----------------------------------
"That was black magic, and it was easy to use. Easy and fun. Like Legos." -- Harry Dresden
-----------------------------------
That's what playing Ragnarok Online taught me: There's no problem in the universe that can't be resolved by the proper application of daggers to faces.
`Doc
Cold in an Alley
posted 08-21-2004 11:35:06 AM
quote:
See, your Random Insanity Generator means your hair. So technically it's true.
Um. He's Brian(3), Brian`. I'm Brian(2)...

At least I think I am... he's supposed to be the younger thief of name...


I feel left out...
Base eight is just like base ten, really... if you're missing two fingers. - Tom Lehrer
There are people in this world who do not love their fellow human beings, and I hate people like that! - Tom Lehrer
I want to be a race car passenger; just a guy who bugs the driver. "Say man, can I turn on the radio? You should slow down. Why do we gotta keep going in circles? Can I put my feet out the window? Man, you really like Tide..." - Mitch Hedberg
Please keep your arms, legs, heads, tails, tentacles, pseudopods, wings, and/or other limb-like structures inside the ride at all times.
Please submit all questions, inquests, and/or inquiries, in triplicate, to the Department of Redundancy Department, Division for the Management of Division Management Divisions.

Elvish Crack Piper
Murder is justified so long as people believe in something different than you do
posted 08-22-2004 07:58:08 AM
Deths little sister writes erotic fiction.

wtfy

(Insert Funny Phrase Here)
Jajahotep
Vader to Deth's Obi-wan
posted 08-22-2004 08:28:53 AM
quote:
Elvish Crack Piper wrote, obviously thinking too hard:
Deths little sister writes erotic fiction.

wtfy


What's so wrong with that??

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