The logo spins back away towards the upper left corner of the screen and hold there as the side of someones head appears, just as hes turning to smile at the screen. His hair is shaved down almost bald and hes got a goatee and wireframe glasses. Across the bottom of the screen, it displays with Vorago Russell, Anchorman!
Shifting, the screen moves to a young woman no, a young man. A young man in a dress and a wig and five oclock shadow. He smiles at the screen and waves with his fingertips. The screen displays his name as well: Also Falaanla McSheman, Co-Anchor!
A quick scene change later and a obese young man is seen sitting in a La-Z-Boy, kicked back, and flipping off the camera. The finger is blurred, but theres a good shot of him scratching himself. Behind him, the TV is displaying the scores of various baseball games. Below all this is another label. Featuring Biff Demitri on Sports!
Another shift and we see a thin older man in a raincoat holding firmly to a laserlight pen. He looks like hes about to have an anxiety attack, but he gestures oddly with the pen onto a wall behind him. The wall has a detailed layout of some unknown landscape, complete with strange symbols one can guess are wind patterns, rain, climates, and the like. He grins nervously as his name appears on the bottom of the screen. Stu Arttemis, Meteorologist!
The screen shifts once again to show a small collection of people, including a stick figure with a fat head eating a microphone, a thin young girl eating candy and chatting endlessly at a figure next to her dressed in dark clothing, and a wild-eyed bald man scanning some type of playing cards in his hands. Below them, a general The ENN Reporter Cast! title appears and the screen fades out. There were other people in the shot, but they werent on screen long enough to remember.
Once again, the logo spins back on the screen. A clear voiceover says Well be right back after these messages!
Commercial Break
As the logo fades out, a new logo fades in. It looks like a walrus sitting on a ledge and basking in the sun. After a moment, the camera pulls back and the logo is apparently part of a grey-smoked beer bottle. Within seconds, a hand clasps the bottle and lifts it up. The camera pans quickly up the arm and fades back again to reveal an older gentleman, distinguished and stern. He takes a long swig of the beer and sets it back down.
Hello, my name is Callalron Stolochnikovyalichivanov. Im here today to let you all know of a new beer on the market and then to tell you that you should buy lots of it and drink heartily. And believe me, I know what Im talking about. Theres not reason to question my wisdom. Have a beer. Youll like it. Itll even help you regenerate lost hair!
Our beers are brewed right here in Vegas by hard-working people just like you and not because they have a gambling debt to work off, despite what the courts say. Speaking of, you can find my beers most readily in any number of the Callalron Casinos. Bring your wallets and your desires, friends!
Try Tusk-a-Tonic today!
He raises his bottle to the screen once more, as the camera zooms in on the label once again. Drink it or else, says the announcers voice.
Stay Tuned for the start of the new season!
sigpic courtesy of This Guy, original modified by me
quote:
Random Insanity Generator said this about your mom:
And all this time I've been thinking you're the Vodka Prince.
I have multiple titles. You can do that when you're royalty.
