2. Who was the first one who thought that the white thing that came from a hen's butt looked edible?
3. Why do toasters always have a setting that burns the toast to a horrible crisp which no decent human being would eat?
4. Why is there a light in the fridge and not in the freezer?
5. If Jimmy cracks corn and no one cares, why is there a song about him?
6. Can a hearse carrying a corpse drive in the carpool lane?
7. If the professor on Gilligan's Island can make a radio out of coconut, why can't he fix a hole in a boat?
8. Why do people point to their wrist when asking for the time, but don't point to their crotch when they ask where the bathroom is?
9. Why does your OB-GYN leave the room when you get undressed if they are going to look up there anyway?
10. Why does goofy stand erect while Pluto remains on all fours? They're both dogs!
11. What do you call male ballerinas?
12. Why ARE Trix only for kids?
13. If Wile E. Coyote had enough money to buy all that Acme crap, why didn't he just buy dinner?
14. If quizzes are quizzical, what are tests?
15. If corn oil is made from corn, and vegetable oil is made from vegetables, then what is baby oil made from?
16. If electricity comes from electrons, does morality come from morons?
17. Is Disney World the only people trap operated by a mouse?
18. Why do the Alphabet song and Twinkle, Twinkle Little Star have the same tune?
19. Do illiterate people get the full effect of Alphabet Soup?
20. Why is it that when someone tells you that there are over a billion stars in the universe, you believe them, but if they tell you there is wet paint somewhere, you have to touch it to make sure?
2. Who was the first one who thought that the white thing that came from a hen's butt looked edible?
Humans have tried to eat all sorts of things. This just happens to be one that didn't kill the person that tried it.
3. Why do toasters always have a setting that burns the toast to a horrible crisp which no decent human being would eat?
Some people do eat it that burnt. It appears that some people use it to calm upset stomachs, much like Tums.
4. Why is there a light in the fridge and not in the freezer?
Temperature. A light bulb in the freezer would shatter because of the changes between freezer temp and the heat it generates when it turns on.
5. If Jimmy cracks corn and no one cares, why is there a song about him?
It's not really a song about Jimmy, it's a song about the fact that "my master's gone away". Jimmy's mentioned just to show that they're so relaxed that they don't care what else is going on.
6. Can a hearse carrying a corpse drive in the carpool lane?
No. Cars following the funeral procession may not have more than one person in them, so they can't be in the carpool lane. Therefore, to lead the procession, the hearse can't go where they can't go, and must stay out of that lane.
7. If the professor on Gilligan's Island can make a radio out of coconut, why can't he fix a hole in a boat?
What are the odds that the professor was scoring with Ginger while they were on that island? And what would his chances be if they got off the island? Now you know why he couldn't fix the boat.
8. Why do people point to their wrist when asking for the time, but don't point to their crotch when they ask where the bathroom is?
Pointing at your crotch had a different meaning before wrist watches were invented. So, when the pointing at your wrist gesture became popular, pointing at the crotch allready had a meaning and didn't adjust to match.
9. Why does your OB-GYN leave the room when you get undressed if they are going to look up there anyway?
The OB-GYN doesn't need to see everything to do their job, just certan parts. This allows the woman to keep the other parts hidden and mainatin some modesty.
10. Why does goofy stand erect while Pluto remains on all fours? They're both dogs!
There are two types of Disney "animals". Pluto isn't the only one that's still a basic animal. There have been cows, birds, and other animals in various Disney movies. Mickey, Donald, and Pluto are from the other kind of Disney animal.
11. What do you call male ballerinas?
Ballet dancers.
12. Why ARE Trix only for kids?
Because adults have better things to eat. And rabbits don't need all that sugar.
13. If Wile E. Coyote had enough money to buy all that Acme crap, why didn't he just buy dinner?
Wile E. Coyote is a tester for ACME. He's paid to test this stuff. By the end of a cartoon, he's usually tested enough to have earned enough money to buy dinner. That's why he doesn't starve to death, despite never catching the Road Runner.
14. If quizzes are quizzical, what are tests?
A trial.
15. If corn oil is made from corn, and vegetable oil is made from vegetables, then what is baby oil made from?
Baby vegetables.
16. If electricity comes from electrons, does morality come from morons?
Nope. At least, not usually. Instead, Mormons come from morons.
17. Is Disney World the only people trap operated by a mouse?
We all know Donald is the real power behind the throne there.
18. Why do the Alphabet song and Twinkle, Twinkle Little Star have the same tune?
Because it's catchy and easy for children to remember.
19. Do illiterate people get the full effect of Alphabet Soup?
Depends on the person. If they enjoy odd shaped noodles in their soup (and other types of soup prove that many people do), then yes.
20. Why is it that when someone tells you that there are over a billion stars in the universe, you believe them, but if they tell you there is wet paint somewhere, you have to touch it to make sure?
People have been trying to reach out and touch the stars from before the begining of recorded history. It's not that they don't want to, it's that they can't. Yet.
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7. If the professor on Gilligan's Island can make a radio out of coconut, why can't he fix a hole in a boat?
What are the odds that the professor was scoring with Ginger while they were on that island? And what would his chances be if they got off the island? Now you know why he couldn't fix the boat.
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13. If Wile E. Coyote had enough money to buy all that Acme crap, why didn't he just buy dinner?
Wile E. Coyote is a tester for ACME. He's paid to test this stuff. By the end of a cartoon, he's usually tested enough to have earned enough money to buy dinner. That's why he doesn't starve to death, despite never catching the Road Runner.
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Palador ChibiDragon painfully thought these words up:
[3. Why do toasters always have a setting that burns the toast to a horrible crisp which no decent human being would eat?
Some people do eat it that burnt. It appears that some people use it to calm upset stomachs, much like Tums.
I just think it tastes the best when making peanut butter toast.
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Vallo had this to say about dark elf butts:
....
4. Why is there a light in the fridge and not in the freezer?
....
Depends on the fridge, most new ones have them in both sections. I think the biggest factor is size, weather it is the size of the compartment, or the size of the sealed system. In fact most side-by-sidees have multiple freezer lights, and bottom-mounts have big ones.
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Peter had this to say about dark elf butts:
Depends on the fridge, most new ones have them in both sections. I think the biggest factor is size, weather it is the size of the compartment, or the size of the sealed system. In fact most side-by-sidees have multiple freezer lights, and bottom-mounts have big ones.
Yeah, my old fridge/freezer only had a light in the fridge but my new one has them in both. And the full sized freezer I've had for just about ever has a light in it as well.
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Blah blah blah Batty blah blah blah...
Yeah, charcoal is actually very good for calming upset stomachs. And burnt toast is basically charcoal. It's just easier to stomach.
My grandfather always had his toast burnt, too. Maybe not because of the stomach calming properties, but also because he liked burnt things; Cajun fried whatnot and all that jazz.
It's an aquired taste.
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Palador ChibiDragon had this to say about Optimus Prime:
2. Who was the first one who thought that the white thing that came from a hen's butt looked edible?
Humans have tried to eat all sorts of things. This just happens to be one that didn't kill the person that tried it.
No no, humans watch what other animals eat. Thus avoiding poisoning and yucky stuff. They saw a racoon eating the eggs and then tried it themselfs. Now, tomatoes... that was a dare I am sure. As tomatoes are part of the nightshade family.
6. Can a hearse carrying a corpse drive in the carpool lane?
No. Cars following the funeral procession may not have more than one person in them, so they can't be in the carpool lane. Therefore, to lead the procession, the hearse can't go where they can't go, and must stay out of that lane.
He didn't say lead a procession. 
Yes, a hearse carrying a corpse can drive in the carpool lane. The law states two or more people. It does not state that they have to be alive.
7. If the professor on Gilligan's Island can make a radio out of coconut, why can't he fix a hole in a boat?
What are the odds that the professor was scoring with Ginger while they were on that island? And what would his chances be if they got off the island? Now you know why he couldn't fix the boat.
I agree with this whole heartidly.
13. If Wile E. Coyote had enough money to buy all that Acme crap, why didn't he just buy dinner?
Wile E. Coyote is a tester for ACME. He's paid to test this stuff. By the end of a cartoon, he's usually tested enough to have earned enough money to buy dinner. That's why he doesn't starve to death, despite never catching the Road Runner.
In addition the Road Runner is also part of the testing program for ACME.
15. If corn oil is made from corn, and vegetable oil is made from vegetables, then what is baby oil made from?
Baby vegetables.
:nods:
16. If electricity comes from electrons, does morality come from morons?
Nope. At least, not usually. Instead, Mormons come from morons.
I live in Utah. My family is Mormon. I agree with you.
17. Is Disney World the only people trap operated by a mouse?
We all know Donald is the real power behind the throne there.
I've heard that mice are behind the voice of God in churches. That would be another people trap.
Men have nipples because human embryo's start out female.
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Genericgirl had this to say about the Spice Girls:6. Can a hearse carrying a corpse drive in the carpool lane?
No. Cars following the funeral procession may not have more than one person in them, so they can't be in the carpool lane. Therefore, to lead the procession, the hearse can't go where they can't go, and must stay out of that lane.He didn't say lead a procession.
Yes, a hearse carrying a corpse can drive in the carpool lane. The law states two or more people. It does not state that they have to be alive.
I know in Cali, you have to be living. people have tried that before to avoid the LA traffic... Immagine embalming your great-aunt in the sitting position, and having her in your car just to use the carpool lane. Cops caught on quickly.
Tomatoes were actually considered poison for a good while. They were grown for their flowers (I think they're white, but they're very pretty) and the fruit was left to rot on the vine.
It took one man (I believe he was black, someone can check later, though) in a town square, eating a bushel of them, to convince people that they weren't poisonous.
I'm of the mind that the noxious little fuckers are indeed poisonous. Nasty, slimy, seedy things!!
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I want some of what Xyrra was smoking when they wrote this:
I know Thomas Jefferson was one of the first people to cultivate tomatoes in a vegetable garden. He's often credited for being the first one to eat them regularly, and the story goes (as I've heard it, could be urban legend), that he ate three or four in front of his assembled slaves, to prove to them that they are not toxic, and perfectly safe to handle, harvest, and ingest. It was from there that tomatoes started to become popularly used in American kitchens.I'm of the mind that the noxious little fuckers are indeed poisonous. Nasty, slimy, seedy things!!
Tomatoes are like most things; an aquired taste.
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This insanity brought to you by Genericgirl:
Men have nipples because human embryos start out female.
I...I was a girl? 
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Mr. Gainsborough had this to say about Punky Brewster:
I...I was a girl?
Physically yes.
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Led's unholy Backstreet Boys obsession manifested in:
You never saw Jurrasic Park? They explained all that ;D lol
I saw the guy get eaten by the T-Rex while he was on the toilet!!
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Genericgirl probably says this to all the girls:
[QB..No no, humans watch what other animals eat. Thus avoiding poisoning and yucky stuff. They saw a racoon eating the eggs and then tried it themselfs. Now, tomatoes... that was a dare I am sure. As tomatoes are part of the nightshade family. ...[/QB]
Potatoes, and tabacco all come from the same family, they are all new world plants, and potatoes were thought to be poisonous too by Europeans. However i am pretty sure that the native North Americans and South Americans ate them long before That Italian got on his boats.
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Vallo had this to say about (_|_):
Why is midget porn so expensive? Shouldn't it be half-off?
They cost more to produce, a good midget porn movie requires a lot of zoom lenses.
