Not only can he beat up Australians, not only can he get into all the zany situations of a cartoon character, not only does he do his own stuntwork, but he does it all while looking like a frightened little girl.
He is the only man that can make running scared look cool. If he had been in Fellowship of the Ring, there'd be a helluva lot more interest when the little fuckers ran like girls, I tell you.
He also has his own line of clothes! I raise my glass and eat a wing to Jackie Chan! Join me!
sigpic courtesy of This Guy, original modified by me
He had a leg cast, but couldn't stop the shooting, so he got a sock that was painted like a sneaker, put it on, and wore long pants to keep the stuntwork up.
Ontop of all that, he gets his ass kicked daily. This man is inhuman.
quote:
Check out the big brain on Mr. Parcelan!
not only can he get into all the zany situations of a cartoon character
But, he is a cartoon character!
quote:
So quoth Ace in the Spade:
What Jackie Chan needs to do, is stop slapping people and start snapping necks! Damnit I want a lethal Jackie Chan. If he could do that then he could be the next Bruce Lee. The true Fist of Legend. But until such time I shall consider him sub par and only fit for performing entertaining outtakes for me to watch.
Thats whats cool about Chan. He doesn't break any Martial Arts codes like those other hacks, and never kills any of his assailants in movies.
And he never initiates a fight, like those listed. His fighting is always in defense. [ 08-07-2003: Message edited by: Skaw ]
quote:
Ace in the Spade enlisted the help of an infinite number of monkeys to write:
...What Jackie Chan needs to do, is stop slapping people and start snapping necks! Damnit I want a lethal Jackie Chan. If he could do that then he could be the next Bruce Lee. The true Fist of Legend. But until such time I shall consider him sub par and only fit for performing entertaining outtakes for me to watch.
You do realize that Chan changed his approach to movies and style because he kept being compared to Bruce Lee, which pissed him off. He changed his style to tend to be more comical than serious.
quote:Are you saying that the A-Team wasn't badass?!
A sleep deprived Ace in the Spade stammered:
I disagree! Jackie Chan is not the "man." Indeed his movie exploits are minscule at best. Not only does he run like a little girl at times and stared in the movie the Tuxedo BUT! But I say, he kills NO ONE!. Watch his movies, never once shall by his hand will a man die. Instead they shall be slapped, punched, kicked, etc for 15 minutes per enemy until they give up, he escapes, or the moive comes up with some other non-lethal alternative.
Only the truly great martial artists can mix the sublime amount of lethality with the correct amount of non-lethal means of ending a fight. I give you Bruce Lee, he killed people! Jet Li, who is horrible at talkign and is in horrible movies, but still he kills some of his opponents. Jean Claude Van Dam the most reviled action star of all time, after Stephen Segal. They both occassionally kill people.
What Jackie Chan needs to do, is stop slapping people and start snapping necks! Damnit I want a lethal Jackie Chan. If he could do that then he could be the next Bruce Lee. The true Fist of Legend. But until such time I shall consider him sub par and only fit for performing entertaining outtakes for me to watch.
Same is true for JC, minus the shooting of course.
quote:
How... Ja'Deth Issar Ka'bael .... aaargh, braen melts...
Here here!
Gaghh.... I didn't expect that from you...
[ 08-07-2003: Message edited by: Tarquinn ]
Thinking about your posts
(and billing you for it) since 2001
Love his movies! Waaaaah!
quote:
Ford Prefect had this to say about Robocop:
And he's got a new movie coming out on the 15th. The Medallion.
quote:
Tarquinn thought about the meaning of life:
Gaghh.... I didn't expect that from you...
Hey I'm a Jackie Chan fan. How can you not like the guy? He's genuinely funny, he's good-natured in real life, he has a lot of fun making his movies, employs his family (his RL uncle has showed up in pretty much every film he's ever made), he's practically an institution of the Hong Kong action film industry, and he worked his way up in an industry where Johnny-Come-Latelies like Jet Li had to use wire special effects to get to (not saying that Jet Li doesn't have skills...dude does, but let's face it; most of his movies involve EXTREME use of wires, whereas Jackie Chan uses old-school, highly-planned stunts, save for this most recent film). When he first hit the scene, he was being compared to Bruce Lee constantly, so he instead created a schtick that has served him well and kept him financially happy for over two decades.
sigpic courtesy of This Guy, original modified by me
quote:
Channeling the spirit of Sherlock Holmes, Tarquinn absently fondled Watson and proclaimed:
Sorry, but you missed the point.
Why does that not surprise me--in the land where "The A-Team" is still shown prime time on weekends?
--Satan, quoted by John Milton
quote:
A sleep deprived Bloodsage stammered:
Why does that not surprise me--in the land where "The A-Team" is still shown prime time on weekends?
As opposed to being shown before I go to work during the week here in the states?
"Damn! .. He won't be in rush hour 3!"
You got pwned.
quote:
Bloodsage got all f'ed up on Angel Dust and wrote:
Why does that not surprise me--in the land where "The A-Team" is still shown prime time on weekends?
And sunday, 2pm is considered to be prime time in the states?
Jackie Chan, however, combines the "Whoooooa duuuuuude" martial arts with the funny storylines to create masterpieces that make me want to forego my free movie privelages and pay for a ticket just to fund the man.
Though there is little more pleasing than going to Block Buster and renting some no name not really released in the US Chan flick where every one was dubed over and still getting a kick out of it.
quote:
Beta Tested spewed forth this undeniable truth:
Jackie Chan rocks. I love his movies. The only bad thing about him in his newest (The Tuxedo) movie his age really looks like it's starting to catch up to him.Though there is little more pleasing than going to Block Buster and renting some no name not really released in the US Chan flick where every one was dubed over and still getting a kick out of it.
in one of those clips from his cartoon where he talks to the camera, jackie says when he can't act perform anymore, he'll still be involved in holywood directing or whatever.. so hopefully he'll be around for a while...
who knows, if arnold can stay badass for this long, jackie can too.