I am tired of scientific fact ruling our lives. What happens when lightning strikes? We argue over how it struck. What happens when we discuss diets? We spend too long wondering which foods affect us how.
It's boring, it's stupid, and it will stop today!
From this day forward, we will base everything on superstition, myth and paranoid delusions.
The girlfriend is giving you trouble? She doesn't have PMS, the Fertility Goddess has given her titanic strength of will and fury!
Lightning strikes you? You weren't wearing too much make-up, the Storm Demons were enraged by your accessories!
Have a headache? It's not the light or the weather, there's an evil spirit inside your cranium!
Now join me, my brothers and sisters! Shun biology, physics, astrology and chemistry! Embrace voodoo, invisible spirits, sky demons and black cauldrons! Be free of science and begin to fear the evil in the skies!
Let Parcelan be our first sacrifice!
...
Wait a minute, that may not please him...
Sorry Parce, you may just make him angrier.
Now go fetch some maize and a fetile pig and let us head to the altar! [ 07-23-2003: Message edited by: Puggy the Squirrel ]
You are wrongfully accused of murder and are sent to prison for 25 years where you become the buttery meat puppet of your big hairy cellmate Tito for 3 years until he finally tires of your screams and trades you for a pack of cigarettes to the scary guy down the hall named Bubba who has his horrible, horrible way with you before finally beating you to death with a metal slat from the bed? Well, God obviously has a plan you cannot possibly understand and all of that was for your better good!
quote:
Vorago stopped beating up furries long enough to write:
Something good happens? God is at work making us happy!
Something bad happens? God works in mysterious ways!You are wrongfully accused of murder and are sent to prison for 25 years where you become the buttery meat puppet of your big hairy cellmate Tito for 3 years until he finally tires of your screams and trades you for a pack of cigarettes to the scary guy down the hall named Bubba who has his horrible, horrible way with you before finally beating you to death with a metal slat from the bed? Well, God obviously has a plan you cannot possibly understand and all of that was for your better good!
[ 07-24-2003: Message edited by: Archer-Penguin ]
Oops, note to self, log out of Nikki's account before posting
quote:
Vorago was naked while typing this:
Something good happens? God is at work making us happy!
Something bad happens? God works in mysterious ways!You are wrongfully accused of murder and are sent to prison for 25 years where you become the buttery meat puppet of your big hairy cellmate Tito for 3 years until he finally tires of your screams and trades you for a pack of cigarettes to the scary guy down the hall named Bubba who has his horrible, horrible way with you before finally beating you to death with a metal slat from the bed? Well, God obviously has a plan you cannot possibly understand and all of that was for your better good!
Yes.
It's called Faith.
Lets see your mystisicm save you nooowww... *grins*
[Edit: OP, that's very cold.]
[ 07-24-2003: Message edited by: Dr. Pvednes, PhD ]
quote:
And I was all like 'Oh yeah?' and OtakuPenguin was all like:
Yes.It's called Faith.
quote:
Hope is...comforting.
It allows us to accept fate, however tragic it might be.
- Lady Yunalesca
Faith and hope are quite similar. [ 07-24-2003: Message edited by: Kegwen ]
quote:
This insanity brought to you by Kegwen:
Faith and hope are quite similar.
Well said.
HUZZAH!
quote:
Check out the big brain on OtakuPenguin!
Yes.It's called Lunacy.
quote:
Kegwen had this to say about Reading Rainbow:
Faith and hope are quite similar.
No...no not even a little bit. 
quote:
Ragabash had this to say about Matthew Broderick:
No...no not even a little bit.
Have faith! God has a plan, all will work out in the end!
In that sense, one is most certainly clinging onto hope for dear life. Maybe they are not direct analogies...
quote:
Kegwen had this to say about Punky Brewster:
Have faith! God has a plan, all will work out in the end!In that sense, one is most certainly clinging onto hope for dear life. Maybe they are not direct analogies...
Faith is a belief. That person believes it will work out as God planned, regardless of what happens to him. If that's not what he means, and he's just wanting to live, then it isn't faith. That's hope. Hope that God will save him. Hope that it isn't his time to die. There's no belief it will happen.
A person can have faith that a God will save them, but it doesn't mean they are right. Right or wrong they still believe it. They aren't hoping it.
[ 07-24-2003: Message edited by: Ragabash ]
Edit: Gah! cursed sidetracks! ... Uh. When you feel you have to go to the bathroom that's just the bowel fairy! It waves it's wand and gives a little tickle! The more cramped his living space the more frantic and urgent his tickling!
quote:
So quoth OtakuPenguin:
Yes.It's called Faith.
See, sometimes God takes those closest to us, because it makes him feel better about himself. He is a very vengeful God. He's all pissed off about something we did thousands of years ago. He just can't get over it, so he doesn't care who he takes. Children, puppies, it don't matter to him, so long as it makes us sad. Look at it this way: if you want to make a baby cry, first you give it a lollipop. Then you take it away. If you never give it a lollipop to begin with, then you would have nothin' to cry about. That's like God, who gives us life and love and help just so that he can tear it all away and make us cry, so he can drink the sweet milk of our tears. You see, it's our tears, that give God his great power.
quote:
Ever a paragon of knowledge, Vorago said:
See, sometimes God takes those closest to us, because it makes him feel better about himself. He is a very vengeful God. He's all pissed off about something we did thousands of years ago. He just can't get over it, so he doesn't care who he takes. Children, puppies, it don't matter to him, so long as it makes us sad. Look at it this way: if you want to make a baby cry, first you give it a lollipop. Then you take it away. If you never give it a lollipop to begin with, then you would have nothin' to cry about. That's like God, who gives us life and love and help just so that he can tear it all away and make us cry, so he can drink the sweet milk of our tears. You see, it's our tears, that give God his great power.
I've been trying to find that South Park quote for months. Priceless.
Faith is no bad thing in itself. The only time it'll get you into trouble is when you try to impose an agenda or ideal upon someone else based upon your faith. Since there's no way to objectively validate it, it's tantamount to an authoritative whim.
Under capitalism, man exploits man. Under communism, it's just the opposite. - John Kenneth Galbraith
quote:Note to self: Be more evil. It will get rid of your headache.
When they turned on the Infinite Improbability Drive, Mr. Parcelan suddenly said,
Have a headache? It's not the light or the weather, there's an evil spirit inside your cranium!
Press the button on the elevator. It doesn't come. Press it again. And again. With enough presses you will eventually wake the troll and he'll pull the car up to you.
The computer locks up. Try to move the mouse. Press the enter key. Still not working? The mischevious little sprite inside the CPU is spiting you. Mash lots of keys. Finally jab your finger into the reset button. Remember, you've got to be firm or he won't pay you any mind.
quote:
We all got dumber when Mr. Parcelan said:
It sucks.I am tired of scientific fact ruling our lives. What happens when lightning strikes? We argue over how it struck. What happens when we discuss diets? We spend too long wondering which foods affect us how.
It's boring, it's stupid, and it will stop today!
From this day forward, we will base everything on superstition, myth and paranoid delusions.
The girlfriend is giving you trouble? She doesn't have PMS, the Fertility Goddess has given her titanic strength of will and fury!
Lightning strikes you? You weren't wearing too much make-up, the Storm Demons were enraged by your accessories!
Have a headache? It's not the light or the weather, there's an evil spirit inside your cranium!
Now join me, my brothers and sisters! Shun biology, physics, astrology and chemistry! Embrace voodoo, invisible spirits, sky demons and black cauldrons! Be free of science and begin to fear the evil in the skies!
When did you move to texas?
quote:
Absolut Blindy's unholy Backstreet Boys obsession manifested in:
When did you move to texas?
When did you think it would be a good idea to pass on suicide?
It's not something people hear about.
quote:
It sucks.
Right about there.
quote:
Vorago stumbled drunkenly to the keyboard and typed:
See, sometimes God takes those closest to us, because it makes him feel better about himself. He is a very vengeful God. He's all pissed off about something we did thousands of years ago. He just can't get over it, so he doesn't care who he takes. Children, puppies, it don't matter to him, so long as it makes us sad. Look at it this way: if you want to make a baby cry, first you give it a lollipop. Then you take it away. If you never give it a lollipop to begin with, then you would have nothin' to cry about. That's like God, who gives us life and love and help just so that he can tear it all away and make us cry, so he can drink the sweet milk of our tears. You see, it's our tears, that give God his great power.
No.
quote:
OtakuPenguin had this to say about Cuba:
No.
Opposite of No!
quote:
Mr. Parcelan needed a klingon dictionary to type:
When did you think it would be a good idea to pass on suicide?
how clever.
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Absolut Blindy had this to say about John Romero:
how clever.
I am nothing if not honest.
quote:
I bet you never expected Mr. Parcelan to say:
I am nothing if not honest.
when you get tired of insulting people for no reason, you will be more than nothing, i guess.
quote:
Absolut Blindy attempted to be funny by writing:
when you get tired of insulting people for no reason, you will be more than nothing, i guess.
And when you get the hint that I don't want you hanging around my threads the seas will be boiling over and dogs will be roaming the streets in packs.
quote:
Absolut Blindy was listening to Cher while typing:
the ignore button is just one click away, why are you resisting it, missile boy?
Because you're the one complaining about being mistreated?
Duuuuurrr?
quote:
Everyone wondered WTF when Absolut Blindy wrote:
and you're the one complaining about me being in your threads. if i bother you that much, ignore me. otherwise, stop starting shit.
Nobody's starting shit, kid. You come into my thread and make a douchebag out of yourself, you're probably going to be insulted.
If I had any confidence that you could understand it, I'd explain it in more detail.
very well, since I can't say anything without being a douchebag in your threads, I will stop posting in them.
quote:
Absolut Blindy Model 2000 was programmed to say:
i'm suprised you and your ego fit in the same continent.very well, since I can't say anything without being a douchebag in your threads, I will stop posting in them.
Problem solved, then.
I credit this solution to the great psions under the earth.
