If I say 'Can you please give me a BRIEF DESCRIPTION of the problem', I only need to know WHAT THE PROBLEM IS, I do not need these utter TWITS to sit here and tell me every single thing that has happened on their PC since they bought the fucking thing.

Gah. Didn't get enough sleep last night. Tired, cranky, and dealing with the worst America has to offer : The general public.

Not meant to be mean, just an observation. =P

[ 05-26-2003: Message edited by: Suddar ]

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Suddar stumbled drunkenly to the keyboard and typed:
And yet here you are, telling us.

Not meant to be mean, just an observation. =P

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Venting is fun and I get to bitch about stupid people doing stupid things like NOT LISTENING TO ME.

You know what my biggest peeve is? When some fucktwat calls up and insists that he knows what the problem is but wants me to tell him how to fix it, when he's COMPLETELY DEAD WRONG.

Case in point :

Last week I had a customer call in saying that he couldn't connect, it was a problem with his password. He insisted, however, that the problem was NOT his password, his problem was that he hasn't checked his e-mail in two weeks and it's full. No matter how many times I explained that he's wrong, the stupid dumbshit wouldn't listen and insisted that I clear his e-mail box. Well, I did so. Didn't fix the problem. GASP!

So then when we did what I suggested and reset the password, he connected just fine, then said 'So since I was wrong, you're going to go ahead and put all the e-mails back you cleared, right?'. Then yelled at me when I told him I couldn't; they were gone.

I wish I could speak my mind at my job so I could tell him 'Hey, fucktwit, YOU are the one that told me that the e-mails were a problem, YOU are the one who wouldn't listen when I insisted they aren't, and so YOU are the one that screwed yourself by calling up tech support AND NOT LETTING US DO OUR JOB, MORON'

Some old guy called in, was polite, explained the symptoms he's having, followed my directions perfectly... we fixed his problem in 15 minutes, he was happy and we hung up... the whole call... was just PERFECT!

He didn't argue with me when I told him to remove stuff... he didn't sit there and try to tell me he knows what the problem is and I should fix it... he just said 'It won't connect, it dials, gets to Authenticating, then says error 645'... HE EVEN REMEMBERED TO WRITE DOWN THE ERROR NUMBER AND ERROR MESSAGE WITHOUT HAVING TO CALL BACK!

And the surprising part is, he wasn't an experienced computer user! He was new to them! He just did the ONE THING that I wish ALL of my customers would do : FOLLOW MY DAMN DIRECTIONS.

Man... I'm like, in shock over this. I didn't think that anyone like this actually existed anymore...

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Iron Parcelan stopped beating up furries long enough to write:
You never hear coal miners or sewer workers complain about their jobs. Do Tech Support people do enough crying for everyone?

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Coal Miners and Sewer Workers don't have to deal with 60 year old women who understand as much about computers as you understand about deep-water Oceanic life, Parce.

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Nobody really understood why Khyron wrote:
Coal Miners and Sewer Workers don't have to deal with 60 year old women who understand as much about computers as you understand about deep-water Oceanic life, Parce.

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I know quite a bit about deep-water aquatic life. I know about Billy the Squealer who lives down there with cement shoes.

I'm just saying there are a lot of people with a lot more right to bitch than you have...that don't.

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Iron Parcelan spewed forth this undeniable truth:
I know quite a bit about deep-water aquatic life. I know about Billy the Squealer who lives down there with cement shoes.

I'm just saying there are a lot of people with a lot more right to bitch than you have...that don't.

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Such as bartenders? They get to sit there, day in and day out, putting up with drunkards, morons, people who try to slip their tab, listening to depressed guys moan on and on while they drown their sorrows, trying to tell that guy who's all but passed out that he's had too much while he screams for more...

[ 05-26-2003: Message edited by: Khyron ]

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Khyron had this to say about Duck Tales:
Such as bartenders? They get to sit there, day in and day out, putting up with drunkards, morons, people who try to slip their tab, listening to depressed guys moan on and on while they drown their sorrows, trying to tell that guy who's all but passed out that he's had too much while he screams for more...

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So are you trying to prove Parcelen's point?

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This one time, at Suddar camp:
So are you trying to prove Parcelen's point?

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Not at all

Parcelan is studying to be a bartender. He's going to be having his own fun, dealing with people. If even half the stories I've heard about the bartending profession are true, then I'm sure Parcelan is going to be having just as much fun as I do Well, except when someone breaks their cup holder around him, I doubt it'll mean being unable to play any CD's for a while.

One of my many duties includes picking up beer bottles that people leave the bar with and finding drunks who are pissing on the building and stopping them.

I guarantee you, if I start whining about people pissing on my place of employment on a regular basis, continue driving your babycar around Babysville, USA with my blessing.

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Iron Parcelan had this to say about Knight Rider:
I don't even get to start as a bartender. I have to start at the bottom.

One of my many duties includes picking up beer bottles that people leave the bar with and finding drunks who are pissing on the building and stopping them.

I guarantee you, if I start whining about people pissing on my place of employment on a regular basis, continue driving your babycar around Babysville, USA with my blessing.

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And so you can work your work and walk away with a smile on your face, and you never feel the need to vent, to rant, to let it out (at least, not on the boards). That's fine, that's how you are, but I'm not the same way.

I want nothing more than to be able to just TELL these people that NO, what they're trying to tell me is WRONG, that they're WRONG, that their solution will not fix it, but I can't, so I let it out here. I do it in real life, too, whenever one of my friends is around for me to chat with, though usually they get off earlier than I do.

If you don't like it, if you don't have to vent after a bad day at work, if you don't ever feel the need to just sit there and bitch about that stupid customer who pissed on YOUR shoes at work, that's fine, but that sure ain't going to stop me from doing so

[ 05-26-2003: Message edited by: Khyron ]

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Nobody really understood why Iron Parcelan wrote:

One of my many duties includes picking up beer bottles that people leave the bar with and finding drunks who are pissing on the building and stopping them.

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You're a janitor then?

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Vorbo Goatboy's account was hax0red to write:
When I was in pre-school I forgot to bring my show and tell item. I improvised. I explained for a good five minutes or so everything I knew about my penis to a class of four year-olds. I went into a prudish shock after getting scorned over that. It took me years before I could even say penis again - my parents prodded me about it for a long time, but I'd never let up. Then I swallowed a penny and we had to go get an x-ray. They told me to take all of my shits in this odd dry-toilet and smash my poo with a stick until I found the penny. A few weeks later we still hadn't found the penny, and so we went and I got x-rayed again and it was gone. That was around the same time that I slept in my stuffed-animal hammock. Boy did my mom ever get steamed about that. But I still did anyway, well, until I fell out of it. Speaking of falling down, I was getting a piggy-back ride from my brother once, and he tripped and I fell and my head landed on the pointy part of the brick thingy that was around our fireplace. Wowzers, did I ever bleed. So I layed down on couch until I stopped bleeding, but the cushion got stuck to my head. It kinda hurt taking it off. Anyway, I think that's why my computer won't boot - any advice?

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LOL

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Iron Parcelan stopped staring at Deedlit long enough to write:
Don't expect people to care for much longer. And after people stop caring, an end of tolerating isn't far behind.

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I don't expect people to care. I just come here, vent, then chuckle at posts like Vorbo's. Because it's a hell of a lot closer to the truth than he realises.

And now, for some humour now that I'm home and not so uptight!

The following is a TRUE STORY. I didn't take the call, but I was listening to the playback during my training class.

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After all the introductions and everything...

"Okay ma'am, what seems to be the problem today?"

"Well, I was talking to your people, and I clicked on the screen, but I clicked too hard, and now it's broken!"

"So you clicked, and it's broken? Did your PC lock up? What is on your screen?"

"Nothing! It's broken! It isn't working! I'm going to have to get a new one! You've got to help me!"

"Okay ma'am, what is the computer doing right now? Is it turned on?"

"Yes, it's turned on, but there's nothing on the screen!"

"Move your mouse, does anything happen?"

"No, nothing happens, it's broken!"

"Try pressing some keys on your keyboard, can you press some of the keys on the keyboard?"

"I can't press the keys because there's glass in them! I told you, I clicked too hard, and now it's broken! You have to help me fix this!"

"So, uh, you clicked your mouse on your monitor, and the glass broke???"

"Yes, now you have to help me fix this, my parents will be home soon!"

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It may have been the girl's idea of a joke... but it was a real call

"Let me have a Big 'n' Tasty."
"Would you like cheese on that?"
"No, I can't have cheese. It gives me gas."

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When the babel fish was in place, it was apparent Comrade Snoota said:
I'll trade you. Imagine hearing this 42948290428490248290 times a day;

"Let me have a Big 'n' Tasty."
"Would you like cheese on that?"
"No, I can't have cheese. It gives me gas."

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May I have some cheese?

I asked him to move the mouse to the "other side". Sure enough, he did - picked up the mouse and moved it to the other side of the keyboard.

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Jens wrote, obviously thinking too hard:
I was once instructing someone in using an economics program called Navision. He was a complete computer idiot.

I asked him to move the mouse to the "other side". Sure enough, he did - picked up the mouse and moved it to the other side of the keyboard.

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That's when you should just get up and leave, or tell someone else to help him/her while you go home and eat some crackers.