I'm planning to take a woman I know in my Japanese class out.
My question to the ladies (or gentleman if you want to participate) is:
Would you go out with me and why? This is either from knowing me just on the boards or in irc.
I also want to know what a general idea of what to do on a date since I've been on so few, and usually not sucessful. 
Anyways, clean yourself up real nice (cologne, neat clothes, etc) and take her to a movie. Keep it light. Keep it casual.
quote:
Humble Parcelan had this to say about Tron:
It is presumptuous to say you'll take her out, unless you've asked and she's said yes.Anyways, clean yourself up real nice (cologne, neat clothes, etc) and take her to a movie. Keep it light. Keep it casual.
A note on the cologne - keep it subtle.
Listen to any further advice Parcelan gives you - he is quite skilled.
That is all.
I's so happy!
Keep it light. As far as anyone is concerned, you're not looking for a girlfriend, you're looking for someone to hang out with on Friday.
Just approach her, ask her what she's doing this weekend. If she's got something, that's cool, you'll see her later. If she doesn't, suggest that you hang out together or go see a movie Friday.
Bing bang bong, get her number, get spritzed up, get ready.
Yeah, you may fuck up big time when you ask or on the date itself, but the reality is, these things happen. You've got many more years to perfect yourself and your big manly grunting and animal magnetism. Don't let one failure get you down, and don't worry so much about failing. Self-fulfillment sucks.
If you share a common interest and it lets you have a place you can communicate, then opt for that. It'll look good that you tried to take her someplace you knew she would enjoy, rather than just the old standby.
And don't be fake. Just be yourself. We're good at sniffing out when you aren't being sincere and most of us would rather see the real you.
Lyinar Ka`Bael, Piney Fresh Druidess - Luclin
It's bad to pretend you're all slick and shit or pretending to be someone else.
But it's equally bad to come right out and tell her your deepest desires, dreams, fears, and so forth.
And a movie is only a crappy idea if you're stupid enough to begin it when the movie begins and end it when the movie ends. If you're smart, you'll ask to meet an hour or two earlier to get some coffee or something, and if it goes well, you'll hang out for much later.
quote:
Humble Parcelan stopped staring at Deedlit long enough to write:
Now I ain't sayin' be fake, but don't be brutally up-front about yourself.It's bad to pretend you're all slick and shit or pretending to be someone else.
But it's equally bad to come right out and tell her your deepest desires, dreams, fears, and so forth.
Oh yeah, definitely. That's why I scrapped my first post which accused you of doing that to a much greater degree when I went and did it soon after. Life's lessons, boys and girls.
You want to be yourself, but you want to be the best yourself you can possibly goddamn be. As Parcelen said, it's best not to gush. In fact, be shallow. It's a first date, and if it works out there is always plenty of time for that later. The best possible thing you can do is stay calm. If the girl sees that you can be calm and collected they're probably going to be more likely to stick around.
Really, it isn't even a matter of being aloof or lying--it's the fact that going on and on about yourself is goddamn self-centered. Spending the whole time whining means you don't have time to do anything else, and it's not very fun for anybody. They'll have fears too, and there is, again, plenty of time for that later. Believe me, as I whine to my girlfriend nearly daily, but the wonderful thing is she doesn't mind and that I have been doing it far less now than I used to. But I can guarantee you if I spent our first meeting with nothing but whining about my inner fears and angst we would not be together today, and I can also guarantee you that I had very much of it at the time.
But good luck with asking her. You seem like good enough people, but I really don't know you so I can't say. Even if I did, I'm not her. [ 11-30-2002: Message edited by: Suddar ]
If she likes bowling, Razor, I would suggest that. It's not too pricey, it's fun, and it lets you chat while you have fun.
Or if you have an indoor games area, like we have Great Times that has arcade, mini golf, go carts, etc, then you could always take her there.
Another option is a family pool hall. Maybe a roller skating/ice skating rink. There are a lot more options than losing two hours of the date in a dark movie theater.
And you should never angst out on a first date. But you *should* communicate. Ask about her, family, friends, likes, dislikes, casual sorts of things you would ask someone when you meet them for the first time. And volunteer that sort of stuff about yourself if you like.
Be casual, and keep the atmosphere pleasant, comfortable and light-hearted.
Lyinar Ka`Bael, Piney Fresh Druidess - Luclin
But a movie is a genuine good standard if you have no other plans.
quote:Niggggaaaaaaa.
How.... Humble Parcelan.... uughhhhhh:
When all else fails, smack tha bitch up. If she don't start bringin' you money, kick her to tha curb and send her outta yo' turf, bish!
And then you whip out yo piece and you all like "BLAM BLAM BLAM" and bust sumpin' in 'em and then you slap that ho and send her back to makin' you MONEY. Dig it?
quote:
Suddar stopped beating up furries long enough to write:
Yeah, you may fuck up big time when you ask or on the date itself, but the reality is, these things happen. You've got many more years to perfect yourself and your big manly grunting and animal magnetism. Don't let one failure get you down, and don't worry so much about failing. Self-fulfillment sucks.
Don't listen to him, every one seems like the right one before the dating, it's important to keep that flow of thought going throughout the dating process. If you go into the relationship thinking that it's not gonna work out, it won't.
In other words: GET CONFIDENT STUPID!!! [ 12-01-2002: Message edited by: Rodent King ]
quote:
Rodent King wrote this then went back to looking for porn:
Don't listen to him, every one seems like the right one before the dating, it's important to keep that flow of thought going throughout the dating process. If you go into the relationship thinking that it's not gonna work out, it won't.In other words: GET CONFIDENT STUPID!!!
Nothin' say confidence like an es-ca-lade.
quote:Yo rap is weak.
Humble Parcelan had this to say about Optimus Prime:
Then man, if yo rivals be all up on her like "how you doin', baby", y'all gotta be like, "YO, FOOLZ! Whachoo checkin' out mah ex-bitch fo'?" And they all like, "Bitch, please, it's yo EX!"And then you whip out yo piece and you all like "BLAM BLAM BLAM" and bust sumpin' in 'em and then you slap that ho and send her back to makin' you MONEY. Dig it?
quote:
Humble Parcelan had this to say about Optimus Prime:
When all else fails, smack tha bitch up. If she don't start bringin' you money, kick her to tha curb and send her outta yo' turf, bish!
quote:
Then man, if yo rivals be all up on her like "how you doin', baby", y'all gotta be like, "YO, FOOLZ! Whachoo checkin' out mah ex-bitch fo'?" And they all like, "Bitch, please, it's yo EX!"And then you whip out yo piece and you all like "BLAM BLAM BLAM" and bust sumpin' in 'em and then you slap that ho and send her back to makin' you MONEY. Dig it?
It's like a circle of pimpiness!
Oh, and thisseems to apply to this thread.
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Rodent King obviously shouldn't have said:
Don't listen to him, every one seems like the right one before the dating, it's important to keep that flow of thought going throughout the dating process. If you go into the relationship thinking that it's not gonna work out, it won't.In other words: GET CONFIDENT STUPID!!!
Isn't this pretty much exactly what I said?
You confuse me.
quote:
From the book of Razor, chapter 3, verse 16:
well Thanks for the early advise. but cut out that pimpin shit...
Make us, ho.
That means getting as spiffed up as the situation allows, be clean, be tidy, and smell good. Few people realize that a person's natural phermones are more powerful than most colognes, so when you scent yourself, be subdued. She should be able to smell you only when she gets close.
Being yourself but cheating also means playing up your best side. If you're funny in real life, don't try to be a big tough string and silent type. If you're a string and silent type, don't try to force jokes. Realize what you're beest at doing, and do that, don't try to be what you think she wants, because if she's there with you, she likes what she sees of you every day.
Remember that on a date, you aren't a buddy, not a friend, you're a MAN. That means opening car and building doors for her, offering your arm when walking in public, seating her at a table, and all the other little chivalrous bits that seem so cheezy, but mean that youre concentrating on her, and not thinking about something else.
Be prompt. This means leaving your house early, and being early to pick her up, but not actually knocking until it's the proper time that you said you'd be there.
As much of a great idea it may seem to bring flowers or chocolates, you'd be better served to bring a teddy bear, or better yet a little handwritten note explaining how much you've anticipated this date, and how she's been dotting your thoughts since she agreed to join you for the night.
Other than that, A movie is good, but on a first date, you'll want a decent chunk of time alone together where you can talk. A restaturant or cefee shop works well, or a walk in the park or along the shore, anywhere that would promote conversation.
Remember to LISTEN. It's fine to look like you're listening, but you actually need to remember what she says. Everyone repeats themselves on a regular basis, so once she starts repeating a story, fill in details from the first telling, or ask questions that show you've been paying attention.
Lastly, find out first if it's a dutch date or a traditional date. On a dutch date, each party pays for their own half, she pays for her own ticket, you pay for yours, etc... On a traditional date, it's your check, and she doesn't even worry about it. Easiest way is to get the tickets for the movie before the date, and to give her hers at some point. If she offers to pay, you say "don't worry about it" or some such, and if she insists, it's dutch, otherwise, you get to pay for everything.
Good luck.
No, Really. Bite me.
(Joke, just be yourself. If she doesn't like that move on. The most important thing in a relationship is having them know who you really are.)
I want the answer now.
You wait, boy, and you wait your damndest. Don't even come right up to her on Wednesday with so much as an eager expression.
Play it cool.
quote:
Razor had this to say about Cuba:
well I have to wait till Wed. for an answer..I want the answer now.
WTFY?????
how's that work?
did you ask her and she's like " I'll tell you wednesday..." Or is it just that you don't see her until then?
No, Really. Bite me.
quote:
Big_Mac's fortune cookie read:
WTFY?????how's that work?
did you ask her and she's like " I'll tell you wednesday..." Or is it just that you don't see her until then?
Kinda both. I'll see her on Wed. and she said she'll think about it, with a big smile.
/me hates being toyed with...
