"yah, I would like a bagel"
"Would you like that toasted?"
"What does toasted taste like?"
"... ever had toast?"
"Yeah"
"Like that, but with a bagel instead"
"But what does the toasted taste like?"
"Like a bagel, but just a little harder on the outside"
"Is that what toasting is?"
"... Bagel + Heat = Toasted"
"Are you making fun of me?"
"No Ma'am"
But really... what does toasted taste like? Tastes like hot? Tastes like burning?
We still can't figure out how exactly to decribe the taste of 'toasted'
Oh, and I found out a great way to get someone angry...
"Do you take American money?"
"Yes, The exchange rate is 45 cents on the dollar, and you get Canadian change back"
"Oh, you are going to give me some funny money back aren't ya?"
"Yup, Yank Money for Funny Money, never a good trade"
Hoo boy they didn't like THAT 
But really, why is it at LEAST 5 times a night I get the question...
"Are these prices in Canadian or American?"
I mean, really... they are in CANADA... why is getting CANADIAN money back such an issue?
Oh, also heard one of the most sad sentences ever...
"Hey, the application is in French AND American, neat"
"... you mean English right sir?"
"No, it's in American, see?"
*shows me the application*
"... sir, just what am I speaking then?"
"American"
I am telling you, I am NOT making these up
Oh yes, and my Rant...
Why do people assume I can read minds?
"I want a bagel, a sandwich and three coffes"
Well, now I get to ask 20 questions... since there are 4 different sizes of coffee, any cream, any suger etc.
I do not walk into McDonalds and say "I want a combo with a dessert please"
It just doesn't make any sense
It's like they just don't care what they eat, as long as it is food and they paid for it
Argh
Need War3 now... [ 10-26-2002: Message edited by: Vorago ]
"Here, Bob, try the chicken. It tastes like... uh... me."
quote:
We were all impressed when Vorago wrote:
We still can't figure out how exactly to decribe the taste of 'toasted'
Would you like your bagel medium rare, or well done? [ 10-27-2002: Message edited by: Palador ChibiDragon ]
And they can't read! There was a big ol' sign behind me at work, and I was sitting, so not blocking it. They'd stare at it real intense.. like it was writen in sanskrit..
Simple, under the drop off section it states "Children must me completly potty trained. NO diapers, NO pull ups."
I still got, after their intense staring "I just changed my little girl/boy. I can still drop her off right?"
>.< i'm="" sorry="" sir/ma'am="" but="" you="" cannot="" drop="" off="" any="" child="" that="" isn't="" completely="" potty="">
"But I just changed her/him. And if she/he needs to go, you can call me if you're to lazy to change them!"
-.- *SIGHS*
[ 10-27-2002: Message edited by: Aanile ]
*edit* I hit post to quickly!
quote:
Aanile spewed forth this undeniable truth:
Simple, under the drop off section it states "Children must me completly potty trained. NO diapers, NO pull ups."
I wonder how many of them realize the heath risks you avoid with that rule? Not only risks to you, but to the other children as well?
quote:
Aanile had this to say about Jimmy Carter:
most Americans = ignorant.
Most Stereotypers = ignorant 
It saved us alot.. and on insurance.
The health codes are super strict. To change a diaper, each employee would need to take a course on, health, child care, first aid...
I mean I would be semi ok, since I'm accually a certified (I think in NY only) Home Health Aid. So I can change a kids diaper, and an adult's diaper...
But.. people don't want to realize it...
quote:
Ruvyen? said this about your mom:
If you can't explain what something tastes like, it probably tastes like death.
quote:
"Would you like that toasted?"
"What does toasted taste like?"
"Tastes of death."
"...what?"
"Toasted. It tastes like death."
quote:
Maradon XP had this to say about Punky Brewster:
Most Stereotypers = ignorant
Thus the most! goober.
I could have said "Every American he, myself, and you, have delt with."
But I opted for the word most.
I mean common... How many times has he heard "Funny money" from Ameircans?
How many stupid customers stories have you regailed to us on the boards? How many Have I related to?
Or Khy? Or anyone in the CS business?
Most seemed to have summed it up nicely.
quote:
Aanile had this to say about John Romero:
most people = ignorant.
Fixed that for ya.
quote:
This one time, at Aanile camp:
Thus the most! goober.I could have said "Every American he, myself, and you, have delt with."
But I opted for the word most.
I mean common... How many times has he heard "Funny money" from Ameircans?How many stupid customers stories have you regailed to us on the boards? How many Have I related to?
Or Khy? Or anyone in the CS business?
Most seemed to have summed it up nicely.
"Look how good it is!"
Well, one day two ladies came in
They ordered two coffees, and as I was making them I look over and they had taken the lid off the cake and were picking pieces off with their fingers and eating some
I almost dropped the freaking coffee pot 
So, I give them their coffees and they act like everything is normal
Medium Coffee
Medium Coffee
Slice of Cake
Slice of Cake
OK, your total comes to 6.85
"What? That is wrong, we only ordered two coffees!"
"Yes, and you ate from two pieces of cake"
"We thought it was free!"
"Man, the price is sitting 3 inches under the cake, on all 4 sides of the stand... but really, why would we give out entire free cakes?"
"Well, I'm not paying for it!"
"OK"
*she looks down, her coffees aren't there*
"Where did my..."
*I pour the coffees out*
Then they got all hiffy and stormed out, trying to slam the door but failing horribly, since our doors don't slam
Had a customer complaining rather badly today about, get this, I accidently gave her a free biscuit
And then she got mad when I took the biscuit back
Oh, also found out some old lady was actually YELLING at one of the trainees on the morning shift because he would not give her 2 dollars when her change was 1.83, and she didn't have the 17 cents
I so wish I had been working then 
quote:
Aanile had this to say about the Spice Girls:
I mean common... How many times has he heard "Funny money" from Ameircans?
So of course nobody is stupid anywhere except America.
I could tell you stories about calls I get from Canadians, and our service is *illegal* in canadia, does that mean most canadians are ignorant?
Jeeze, you come off as just looking for an excuse to bash America.
I mean they'll ask the prices, so they can double check.. but never had a problem with them asking lame no brainer questions.
And I fully admitt I have my ignorances.. =P
I'm not stereotyping or anything, but I get at LEAST 10 customers a night compaining, quite literally, about us using Canadian money in Canada
Good god, I am not saying all Americans are like the ones I deal with
I do get the cool ones, had three today... heck, one of them had just arrived in Canada for the very first time
They actually laughed at another customer who right after them said "Wait, you mean the prices are in Canadian?"
I gave them free stuff for being so cool
And as of 'Funny Money', I can think of a dozen instances off the top of my head using those EXACT words
Also have gotten...
"Monopoly money"
"Color cash"
"That other money"
It is NOT a rare occurance
I've gotten three people that were not even aware we even HAD Canadian money, period...
It is the ungodly annoying occurance of 'Funny Money' which finally made me give them a retort back to piss them off, heh
I don't get paid enough to deal with that much on such a regular basis
quote:
Nobody really understood why Maradon XP wrote:
Jeeze, you come off as just looking for an excuse to bash America.
And yet... this wouldn't had been a serious issue, had you not decided to pop in and make it one.
WHOOPS!! Oh well. How about I say "Most people"? Would you toss a fit over that to?
Most consumers?
I mean.. Why not go off on Vorago for comming in here complaining about the customers he does get from the states?
quote:
Aanile thought about the meaning of life:
....
But.. people don't want to realize it...
Just people don't think. I work at a part store, Space on our selves is money, So do yuo keep a part that never breaks in stock or parts that break often?
Sears Sells a Shitload of stuff, that changes often, Enough so that our databases of parts exeeds 5 mil, would you belive people never think about this even with this big honking yellow sign sitting in out sales floor when they put their broken size 10 widgit on my counter with no model number and tells me to find it? Better is when they tel it was the only one sears made that year (HAHAHAHAHA Little do they know Sears has more than one model year out and they only showroom base/homeowner models) Or I get "It the red one" Which is great because everything else made within in 5 years of it was red too.
Pretty smart kid comes in, 14 years old, has an EB giftcard (The rechargeable ones. ), and wants to trade in some old n64 games he doesn't play anymore. No biggie.
Only they dont have boxes or instructions. We still take 'em, but they're like, MAYBE a buck or two. One was four, and only cos it was a sports title (Madden 2k I think..). Kid is happy with it (Wow, Eight bucks on the card! ) and leaves.
Twenty minutes later, when both Matt (Guy who was training me, Yes, it was the first damned day) and me are busy with two customers each, a lady comes back, obviously the mother of above child and starts berating us about "He's only 14 and doesn't know how to handle himself around adults" and "How dare you rip him off like that!" and "I know a 50 dollar game isn't worth a dollar!" and similar bullshit, and talks OVER us when we try to explain three basic principles:
Matt eventually rung the four games back up, and overrided the prices to what they traded in for, and used the card to "pay" for it, but I know he got in a bit of trouble. And was pretty pissed for a good hour after that.
I wish moms like that wouldn't let their children loose on the mall, then go all into superfrenzy mode when they find out that their kid did something wrong when they weren't actually parenting them.
quote:
Aanile had this to say about Captain Planet:
And yet... this wouldn't had been a serious issue, had you not decided to pop in and make it one.
It wouldn't have been a serious issue because not a lot of people express thier offense at you bashing americans for no reason.
"Some people are stupid" is a general statement that some people are stupid.
"Most americans are stupid" is a bigoted and untrue generalization that implies that Americans are predisposed to being stupid.
If you want to believe that for whatever reason, feel free, just pointing out that a) reality tends to disagree with you, and b) there are, indeed, stupid people in other countries than america.
quote:
Vorago had this to say about Optimus Prime:
OK, we sell cake... and we always have a cake on the counter on a stand with a big lid on top, sort of to entice the customer to buy it..
I love that cake. I try to get a slice whenever possible.
quote:
Delphi Aegis had this to say about Captain Planet:
turbo christian soccer mom.
wow, in a thread where we are obviously against stereotypes, you make two.
Good going, champ! [ 10-27-2002: Message edited by: Densetsu ]
I'm offended by your being offended by silly things.
Yep.
So take it as a joke, understand that inserting such adjectives into your rantings is funnier than just saying "some lady," and stop raining shame on people's humour.
Lyinar Ka`Bael, Piney Fresh Druidess - Luclin
quote:
Densetsu had this to say about Matthew Broderick:
Fixed that for ya.
They both work.*
If most people are ignorant and all American's are people (except Florida, most of them aren't aware they've died - at least in election time), then most American's are ignorant.
Replace America with Canada, England, Japan, or any other country and it works so long as the statement "Most people are ignorant" is true.
*under the agreement that the statement "Most people are ignorant" is true but not always under the agreement that the statement "Most Americans are ignorant" is true. [ 10-27-2002: Message edited by: Vorbo Goatboy ]
quote:
Densetsu had this to say about Tron:
wow, in a thread where we are obviously against stereotypes, you make two.Good going, champ!
Omg, a post where I don't doublequote you.
You didn't see the mom. She was one, and obviously more concerned with parenting after the fact, then preventing the fact. She could have spent an extra five minutes with her son and said "Well, we don't think thats a fair price on those trade ins." and nobody would be angry, but nooooo.
CS get the stupid americans and those of other natioalities because people who already need help to turn on a computer, or how to do some other stupid easy thing(which is probably already in the manual, which is most likely lost or thrown away because they "didnt need it") will most likely be stupid.
The smart american doesnt call tech support as often as a dumber americam, and as a "class" has a better chance of being able to figure something out just from playing with it for a while. The guy who fixes computers at the local cardshop in my town just figures out the size of the part nad the size of the slot, maybe looks at the color of it, and then pushes till it fits.
edit: erm wrong thread for that last part [ 10-27-2002: Message edited by: Elvish Crack Piper ]
Well crud
quote:
Delphi Aegis had this to say about Matthew Broderick:
Omg, a post where I don't doublequote you.
You didn't see the mom. She was one, and obviously more concerned with parenting after the fact, then preventing the fact. She could have spent an extra five minutes with her son and said "Well, we don't think thats a fair price on those trade ins." and nobody would be angry, but nooooo.
You could tell that she was not only a Christian, but a "turbo" Christian, just by looking at her?
I have known a few turbo christian soccer moms, and this idiot sounds like one
"What's the difference between Grilled and Crispy chicken?"
"One is grilled and the other is crispy."
I have that conversation at least once a week.
quote:
Comrade Snoota thought this was the Ricky Martin Fan Club Forum and wrote:
My favorite at my soon to be ex place of employement will always be:"What's the difference between Grilled and Crispy chicken?"
"One is grilled and the other is crispy."
I have that conversation at least once a week.
Waitaminute. What's the difference between salted and unsalted fries?
"Pepporoni?"
"Yeah, lemme get some of those."
quote:
Elvish Crack Piper had this to say about Duck Tales:
Im an american and not considered stupid by other people that have some bit of intelligence.CS get the stupid americans and those of other natioalities because people who already need help to turn on a computer, or how to do some other stupid easy thing(which is probably already in the manual, which is most likely lost or thrown away because they "didnt need it") will most likely be stupid.
The smart american doesnt call tech support as often as a dumber americam, and as a "class" has a better chance of being able to figure something out just from playing with it for a while. The guy who fixes computers at the local cardshop in my town just figures out the size of the part nad the size of the slot, maybe looks at the color of it, and then pushes till it fits.
edit: erm wrong thread for that last part
Wow.. so if.. i always take my car to the shop for repairs because I don't know how to do it myself.. i MUST be a dumb american right?
And here's a little reality check. The smart people call tech support when they have a problem. it's the dummies that fuck around and screw their shit up, THEN call tech support.
You just invalidated your first statement.
Wooohooo!! Lets hear it for being a dumb american!! 
:P
quote:
Vorago said:
"Hey, the application is in French AND American, neat"
"... you mean English right sir?"
"No, it's in American, see?"
*shows me the application*
"... sir, just what am I speaking then?"
"American"
I hear this (and similar things) way too much, usually from new recruits that have joined my English-owned and English-run guild which has it's webpage on an English server.
Them: "Hey Avy, you keep spelling armor and color wrong on the website."
Me: "AAAAAAAAARGH!!!"
quote:
Aanile was listening to Cher while typing:
most Americans = ignorant.And they can't read! There was a big ol' sign behind me at work, and I was sitting, so not blocking it. They'd stare at it real intense.. like it was writen in sanskrit..
Not so much Americans as American parents, I would think. And dont flame me for flaming Americans, cause I am one.
Well, I volunteer at the railroad museam here. Over the last few weeks, we had Thomas the Tank Engine to push around (go to here if you wanna know who that is). Now, the Thomas dumby weighs 36000 pounds, 59 ton locomotive, and then 7x 30,000 pound cars in the train...for a grand total of 364,000 pounds empty. Add 270 people on a train. Things sick out over the rails a good 2.5 feet on either side, Thomas and the locomotive even more. Fine and good, except parents will stick their 6 yo children 2 feet away from the rails to get a picture. When you blow the whistle at them, they stand there and wave like its the coolest thing in the world that you are paying attention to them. When you dump the air and stop, they walk up and ask whats wrong. The only responce I could think of was to ask if they had any idea what 182 tons of steel and timber will do to 50 pounds of flesh and bone. At least that didnt happen very often. Maby 7 or 8 times our of 91 trips.
More than that, they tend to ignore "keep off" signs. we have them all over everything, and yet e find kids on top of cars, climbing plow blades, in/on top of locomotives (and by in I mean like in the boiler). I found one set of parents with their kids climbinb up a plow blade taking pictures. I walk over and very nicely ask the to not climb on things, cause we dont want anyone to get hurt. They proceed to tell me how they can take care of their children, and how I need to mind my own buisness while their daughter slides down the blade and slices her hand open on a bolt head. And then I get bitched out for not helping her off the blade.
So, I walk away, get lunch and come back, and now the same family is letting their kids climb over a boiler 20 feet in the air..
So, in conclusion, children will do anything their parents will let them do, and parents are too dumb to know what not to do. [ 10-27-2002: Message edited by: Aaniele Jadedsky ]
quote:
Aaniele Jadedsky was listening to Cher while typing:
And dont flame me for flaming Americans, cause I am one.
That's not really an excuse. Aanile is American, too. Whether she likes it or not.
