How Class Balancing Works - EverCrest Message Forums

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Topic: How Class Balancing Works

Pesco

Is a copyright of Peachis. Don't underestimate his pants, either.

posted 09-07-2002 07:23:36 PM

Found this on the Ranger's Glade. Quite Amusing.

Warrior: Paladins do too much damage.
Rogue: I agree.
Ranger: Nerf Necros!!
Necromancer: Hey!!!
Ranger apologizes to Necromancer.
Ranger: Sorry, about that. It's an old habbit. I really meant nerf Paladins.
Paladin: Hey!!!
Druid: Phat Lewtz!
Everyone stares at Druid.
Shaman: Yea, let's nerf Paladins.
Enchanter: Paladins are bad and evil people. Nerf them all.
Paladin [whines]: But Shadow Knights do more damage than us.
Nobody notices Shadow Knight.
Everyone else [chanting]: Nerf Paladins.
Verant nerfs Paladins.
Paladin whimpers.
Wizard: I think Rangers do too much damage with archery.
Rogue: I agree.
Paladin: I definately agree. Nerf Rangers!
Druid: Phat Lewtz!
Everyone stares at Druid again.
Ranger: Hey, now! I can't hit the broad side of anything.
Rogue: Prove it!
Warrior: Yea, prove it.
Ranger: Ok, bring in the largest living thing you can find.
Shaman casts Primal Avatar on Ranger, then wanders off to solo Western Wastes dragons.
Beast Lord casts Savagery on Ranger.
Ranger whispers something to Magician.
Bard [singing]: Oh great Veeshan. We seek your assistance!
Veeshan tries to walk in but is so big that there is only room for part of her head.
Magician gets ready to cast Call of Hero on Ranger.
Ranger aims carefully at Veeshan, but missses and hits Necromancer.
Ranger: Nerf Necros!!!!
Necromancer: Hey!!!
Ranger: You got in the way of my arrow.
Necromancer: So...
Ranger: You were standing behind me.
Magician has had a long time rivalry with Necromancer due to pets.
Magician: Yea, let's nerf Ncromancers just umm because he's a gnome.
Enchanter: Necromancers are bad and evil people. Nerf them all... especially the gnome ones.
Verant nerfs Necromancers.
Necromancer sigh disappointed.
Shadow Knight get negatively effected by the nerf as well.
Shadow Knight: That wasn't fair!!!!!
Paladin: But you didn't get nerfed when we got nerfed for doing too much damage.
Rogue and Warrior finally notice Shadow Knight.
Rogue: Shadow Knights are doing damage? Nerf em!
Warior: Nerf!!
Verant nerfs Shadow Knights.
Shadow Knight looks at Paladin icily.
Wizard: I still think Rangers do too much damage with archery.
Everyone stares at Ranger.
Ranger aims carefully at Veeshan again.
Shadow Knight casts a few spells on Paladin when nobody is paying attention.
Ranger hits Veeshan and does double damage for 1!
Magician begins to cast a spell.
Magician: I summon thee Ranger...
Ranger: Get on with it!!!!
Magician casts Call of Hero on Ranger.
Veshan: PALADIN!
Warrior: *** - Paladin out agroed me on Veeshan. I even had area effect taunt going!!!
Cleric rezes Paladin.
Warrior: Paladins taunt to much and need to be nerfed.
Verant nerfs Paladins.
Druid: Phat Lewtz!
Everyone stares at Druid yet again.
Ranger: *** - how is it possible to do double damage for one?
Paladin points at ranger and laughs hestirically.
Wizard: Ranger did one point of damage on Vesshan! Nerf!
Rogue: Nerf Ranger!!
Ranger grins evilly at Paladin while whispering something to Magician and Shadow Knight.
Everyone rebuffs Paladin.
Ranger shoots another arrow at Veeshan.
Magician casts Call of Hero on Ranger.
Veeshan: PALADIN!
Cleric scouls at Ranger, Magcian and Shadow Knight while rezing Paladin again.
Ranger: I agree with Warrior. Paladins clearly taunt way to much.
Magician: Yea!! Let's nerf Paladin.
Shadow Knight: Yea, even I can't taunt that much.
Necromancer: Nerf Necros... um. I mean Nerf Paladins!
Verant nerfs Paladins again.
Paladin makes a rude gesture at Ranger.
Rogue backstabs Veeshan for 1,000,000 points of damage.
Everyone stares at Rogue, who is dodging and evading Veeshan.
Rogue: Wha are you staring at me for?
Veeshan: ROGUE!
Cleric sighs while pulling out the rez stick again, then wanders off to solo.
Everyone giggles at Rogue.
Druid: Phat Lewtz!
Monk: Druid is annoying me. Let's nerf him.
Enchanter: Druids are bad and evil people. Nerf them all.
Ranger realises that Druid nerfs tend to hit Rangers.
Ranger: I don't think we should nerf Druids.
Rogue: Why not?
Ranger: Do you want every Druid giving you one-way ports to Surefall Glades? Think about it.
Wizard cackles.
Wizard: Think I care about that? I can port myself.
Ranger: After Druids start porting everyone to Surefall Glades, do you want everyone come to you for ports?
Wizard gulps.
Ranger, Magician and Shadow Knight look at each other then look at Paladin.
Paladin: I don't think we need to nerf Druids. Really. Please, let's not nerf them.
Druid lets out a sigh of relief.
Cleric returns from soloing and tries to look innocent.
Paladin: Cleric is out damaging me, and I cannot even solo like she does.
Bard plays a minature violin for Paladin.
Cleric: Who me? I just am a poor healer.
Druid points at Cleric: I see PHAT LEWTZ!!
Everyone but cleric: NERF Clerics!!!
Verant nerfs Clerics.
Beast Lord summons Beast Lord's Warder.
Paladin [teasing Ranger]: Beast Lord summoned a pet ranger.
Ranger whispers to Paladin: I *WILL* get you for that!
Paladin casts Brells Mountainsous Barrier on Ranger but it doesn't take hold.
Ranger smirks at Paladin while aiming his bow at Veeshan.
Paladin panics.
Magician and Shadow Knight prepare to cast spells.
Veeshan: PALADIN!!
Warrior [who is clueless as to what is going on]: ***!!!! I HAD AREA EFFET TAUNT GOING AGIAN!!!
Cleric rezes Paladin again.
Warrior: I think there is something very wrong here. Paladin STILL taunt to much.
Warrior glares at Paladin.
Ranger: Let's nerf Paladin again.
Magician: Even I can see that Paladin needs to be nerfed.
Everyone but Paladin: Nerf Paladin!
Paladin: Havn't I been nerfed enough?
Ranger: Nope.
Shadow Knight: I agree, Paladins need more nerfing.
Verant nerfs Paladins.
Enchanter: Necromancers are bad and evil people. Nerf them all... especially the human ones.
Paladin: But you're a human too!
Enchanter turns into a dark elf.
All male characters except Beast Lord drool.
Beast Lord hugs his pet.
Cleric: I think Enchanter is too sexy and needs to be nerfed.
Rogue: I veto that.
Wizard: I think Enchanter's clothing needs to be nerfed.
Enchanter wishes she could hide but isn't of a race that has the skill.
Ranger whispers something to Shadow Knight.
Shadow Knight: My horse is better than the holy steed.
Paladin: Is not.
Shadow Knight: Is too.
Ranger: Why don't you two get out your horses to prove it.
Paladin summons the holy steed.
Veeshan: PALADIN!
Cleric forgets about nerfing Enchanter as she rezes Paladin again.
Warrior: I think Paladin's horse taunts too much!!!!
Shadow Knight: Yea! My horse didn't do that.
Shadow Knight neglects to mention that he didn't summon his horse.
Rogue: Yea, let's nerf the taunt on Paladins horse.
Ranger: Actually, it's kinda fun to watch Paladin get himself killed by summoning it around dragons.
Warrior: Hmm... You do have a good point there.
Paladin looks dejected.
Ranger points to Beast Lord's Warder.
Magician: I'm annoyed that Fluffy can't zone like Beast Lord's crappy pet. Can we nerf him?
Beast Lord: I'm a crappy class and nobody likes me.
Necromancer: Us old skool pet classes hate you because our pets don't zone.
Rogue: Why are you even a Beast Lord anyway?
Wizard: Even after all the nerfs, Paladins are still more useful.
Enchanter: That's a low blow!
Beast Lord: Umm... I wanted a pet.
Magician: NERF BEAST LORD!!!!
Necromancer: Nerf Beast Lords!
Druid: Nerf...
Shaman returns from soloing carrying some treasure.
Druid: PHAT LEWTZ!!!!
Everyone looks at Druid.
Druid: I mean Beast Lords... Let's nerf Beast Lords.
Wizard: Let's nerf Druid's nukes... all of them.
Ranger glances over to Magician and Shadow Knight.
Shadow Knight buffs Paladin.
Ranger's bow crackles with energy.
Ranger scores a critical hit on Veeshan!(1000)
Magician casts Call of Hero on Ranger.
Veeshan: PALADIN!!
Paladin: NOOO!
Warrior: ....