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Author
Topic: Let's say you're a doorknob
Maradon!
posted 08-16-2002 12:05:56 AM
You're a doorknob. You are locked. Someone tries to turn you.

Do you:

a) Not budge at all

b) jiggle a bit, offer a peek of the other side, but remain unyielding to passage

c) spin round and round but still hold the door shut firm

d) come off in the person's hand

OtakuPenguin
Peels like a tangerine, but is juicy like an orange.
posted 08-16-2002 12:06:45 AM
B
..:: This Is The Sound Of Settling ::..
Azrael Heavenblade
Damn Dirty Godmoder
posted 08-16-2002 12:06:53 AM
A. D sounds dirty
"The basic tool for manipulation of reality is the manipulation of words. If you can control the meaning of words, you can control the people who must use them." - Philip K. Dick
Oh shi...
what
posted 08-16-2002 12:07:08 AM
quote:
There was much rejoicing when Maradön² said this:
d) come off in the person's hand
Zaza
I don't give a damn.
posted 08-16-2002 12:07:24 AM
C
Nwist, Who?
Nwist
posted 08-16-2002 12:07:32 AM
e) Explode.
Cap'n Elethi
I'm too sexy for my shirt, too sexy for my shirt...
posted 08-16-2002 12:07:36 AM
D! D!

Hopefully, then they'll throw me at someone.

Elethi Rian, A Man Of Many Talents
G.S. Waisztarroz
Pancake
posted 08-16-2002 12:07:52 AM
A
nem-x
posted 08-16-2002 12:08:09 AM
D, because that's the funniest.
JooJooFlop
Hungry Hungry Hippo
posted 08-16-2002 12:08:21 AM
When correctly viewed, everything is lewd.
I don't know how to be sexy. If I catch a girl looking at me and our eyes lock, I panic and open mine wider. Then I lick my lips and rub my genitals. And mouth the words "You're dead."
Ruvie's Alt
Haven't you always wanted a monkey?
posted 08-16-2002 12:11:13 AM
quote:
Commie Nwist had this to say about the Spice Girls:
e) Explode.
Addy
posted 08-16-2002 12:13:35 AM
B.
Oh shi...
what
posted 08-16-2002 12:14:44 AM
quote:
Adrecia Tru'Ril wrote this then went back to looking for porn:
D.
Vise the Stompy
Title now 100% ass free!
posted 08-16-2002 12:17:46 AM
quote:
Commie Nwist had this to say about Optimus Prime:
e) Explode.
G.S. Waisztarroz
Pancake
posted 08-16-2002 12:18:08 AM
I wonder what the point of this is.
Nicole
The hip-hop-happiest bunny in all of marshmallow woods
posted 08-16-2002 12:18:43 AM
F) Fall out of the door and let the door swing wide open, revealing the scene of burglary that could have been avoided if they had just bought the more expensive version of me.


I just spent
my last cent
purchasing this poverty.

Maradon!
posted 08-16-2002 12:41:30 AM
quote:
ACES! Another post by G.S. Waisztarroz:
I wonder what the point of this is.

point?

Palador ChibiDragon
Dismembered
posted 08-16-2002 12:48:59 AM
B.

And I'll be one of those fancy, lever-type doorknobs. Brass, with scrollwork.

I believe in the existance of magic, not because I have seen proof of its existance, but because I refuse to live in a world where it does not exist.
Tegadil
Queen of the Smoofs
posted 08-16-2002 12:50:45 AM
B.
Elvish Crack Piper
Murder is justified so long as people believe in something different than you do
posted 08-16-2002 01:10:45 AM
E) Kaboomie
(Insert Funny Phrase Here)
Maradon!
posted 08-16-2002 01:24:15 AM
quote:
Elvish Crack Piper was naked while typing this:
E) Kaboomie

That is not a valid choice

Trent
Smurfberry Moneyshot
posted 08-16-2002 02:22:31 AM
D
Archer-Penguin
Pancake
posted 08-16-2002 02:38:26 AM
B!

[center]
Ta-Daa![/center]
King Parcelan
Chicken of the Sea
posted 08-16-2002 02:53:31 AM
A), yo.
Maradon!
posted 08-16-2002 02:55:00 AM
I'd definatly be C, personally.
Black
The Outlaw Torn
posted 08-16-2002 03:01:20 AM
Q) The pulling on me results in the entire door coming off it's hinges and falling on top of the pullee.


Time was never on my side.
So on I wait my whole lifetime.

JooJooFlop
Hungry Hungry Hippo
posted 08-16-2002 03:05:32 AM
Oh, I almost forgot:

You're a doorknob.

I don't know how to be sexy. If I catch a girl looking at me and our eyes lock, I panic and open mine wider. Then I lick my lips and rub my genitals. And mouth the words "You're dead."
Arrenn Lightblade
Yes. Yes he is.
posted 08-16-2002 03:29:26 AM
z)Self defense, stick their hand with hooks, then make myself heat up and burn their hand, then freeze so their hand gets even more stuck.
Pvednes
Lynched
posted 08-16-2002 08:09:05 AM
B.
Lenlalron Flameblaster
posted 08-16-2002 08:26:43 AM
C.
Grammar is your enemy! - While being able to understand someone's sentences might seem like a good idea for a proper essay, complaining on a forum scarcely leaves time for such trivialities. Write fast! You're angry, grrr! Make that show, and forget about things like capital letters, punctuation, and verbs.
Il Buono
You see, in this world there's two kinds of people, my friend.
posted 08-16-2002 08:29:04 AM
You are such a knob.

I'd be C.

"Those with loaded guns, and those who dig. You dig."
Ruvie's Alt
Haven't you always wanted a monkey?
posted 08-16-2002 11:16:05 AM
quote:
From the book of D©, chapter 3, verse 16:
You are such a knob.

Damn... Got to it before I did.

`Doc
Cold in an Alley
posted 08-16-2002 11:19:04 AM
quote:
From the book of JooJooFlop, chapter 3, verse 16:
When correctly viewed, everything is lewd.
I could tell you things about Peter Pan,
Or the Wizard of Oz! (Now there's a dirty old man. )

I'd go with option C. I enjoy confusing people, but falling off in their hands ends the joke too quickly.

Base eight is just like base ten, really... if you're missing two fingers. - Tom Lehrer
There are people in this world who do not love their fellow human beings, and I hate people like that! - Tom Lehrer
I want to be a race car passenger; just a guy who bugs the driver. "Say man, can I turn on the radio? You should slow down. Why do we gotta keep going in circles? Can I put my feet out the window? Man, you really like Tide..." - Mitch Hedberg
Please keep your arms, legs, heads, tails, tentacles, pseudopods, wings, and/or other limb-like structures inside the ride at all times.
Please submit all questions, inquests, and/or inquiries, in triplicate, to the Department of Redundancy Department, Division for the Management of Division Management Divisions.

Caanis Lupus
Rub me?
posted 08-16-2002 07:39:30 PM
there is no door...
Majox
Pancake
posted 08-16-2002 07:46:51 PM
quote:
Ford Prefect was listening to Cher while typing:
I could tell you things about Peter Pan,
Or the Wizard of Oz! (Now there's a dirty old man. )

Damn, beat me too it.
I think I would go with B.

I just make ideas, I don't make them good. - Me
Cadga
Quite Insane
posted 08-16-2002 08:02:07 PM
Q.) i would tap directly into the disc's probility field and once touched i would warp the unsuspecting grasper into a tree hanging over into the rimfall. Then i would become sentiant and follow the grasper around taunting him mercilessly until turned 180 degrees by a water buffalo on the thrid teusday of octvember (the hidden month between november and october that can only be lived in while in a coma from falling off a haystack, while wearing an orange hat.)

[ 08-16-2002: Message edited by: Lord Monkah ]

Professional Sinner/Heretic
My mindless dribble
Khyron
Hello, my mushy friend...
posted 08-16-2002 08:05:53 PM
Q) I would be none of the above, and instead be a doornob for a background for an ultra-kinky porno. I would be used by the woman 3 times in the show.
G.S. Waisztarroz
Pancake
posted 08-16-2002 08:07:07 PM
There's more than one Q! Gasp!
Cadga
Quite Insane
posted 08-16-2002 08:09:14 PM
quote:
G.S. Waisztarroz had this to say about Robocop:
There's more than one Q! Gasp!

mines better
Khy just played on the fact that we are all mostly horny people obsessed with imaginary woman that are blue.

Professional Sinner/Heretic
My mindless dribble
Lyinar Ka`Bael
Are you looking at my pine tree again?
posted 08-16-2002 09:15:19 PM
I'm torn betwen A or C. It would be amusing to completely piss the person off, but it would also be amusing to screw with their mind a bit before I did.

I think I'd end up turning around and around and around and not budging, then refusing to turn entirely when I got bored with that.

[ 08-16-2002: Message edited by: Lyinar Ka`Bael ]


Lyinar Ka`Bael, Piney Fresh Druidess - Luclin

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