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Author
Topic: So I'm going to meet the folks tomorrow...
Drysart
Pancake
posted 05-23-2002 11:15:04 PM
If you don't hear from me by Tuesday, assume they shot me. It is Texas after all, I'm pretty sure they could shoot me for whatever reason they wanted to.

Any last minute tips before we leave tomorrow morning?

Il Buono
You see, in this world there's two kinds of people, my friend.
posted 05-23-2002 11:15:31 PM
Wear a Lynyrd Skynyrd t-shirt.
"Those with loaded guns, and those who dig. You dig."
Black
The Outlaw Torn
posted 05-23-2002 11:16:07 PM
Don't feel up Piper in front of her Parents.

AND DON'T LIGHT THE HOUSE ON FIRE. I'm sure they don't like that.



Time was never on my side.
So on I wait my whole lifetime.

Sentow, Maybe
Pancake
posted 05-23-2002 11:16:34 PM
DAMN YOU BLACK MAGE!

[ 05-23-2002: Message edited by: Sentow ]

Once more into the breach, my friends, once more. We'll close the wall with our dead. In peace, nothing so becomes a man as modesty and humility, but when the blast of war blows in our ears, then imitate the action of the tiger, summon up the blood, disguise fair nature with rage and lend the eye a terrible aspect.
Black
The Outlaw Torn
posted 05-23-2002 11:17:19 PM
quote:
Sentow obviously shouldn't have said:
DAMN YOU BLACK MAGE!


Time was never on my side.
So on I wait my whole lifetime.

Dave
)_(
posted 05-23-2002 11:17:23 PM
And don't say anything about evercrest or blue butts.
Random Insanity Generator
Condom Ninja El Supremo
posted 05-23-2002 11:21:06 PM
quote:
Drysart had this to say about Robocop:
If you don't hear from me by Tuesday, assume they shot me. It is Texas after all, I'm pretty sure they could shoot me for whatever reason they wanted to.

Any last minute tips before we leave tomorrow morning?


Yeah, let me know when you're passing through Dallas so I can make sure to take a few shots at you myself....

* NullDevice kicks the server. "Floggings will continue until processing power improves!"
-----------------------------------
"That was black magic, and it was easy to use. Easy and fun. Like Legos." -- Harry Dresden
-----------------------------------
That's what playing Ragnarok Online taught me: There's no problem in the universe that can't be resolved by the proper application of daggers to faces.
Azakias
Never wore the pants, thus still wields the power of unused (_|_)
posted 05-23-2002 11:22:30 PM
What, is this everyone go to Texas weekend?

I mean.. I'm heading out to San An tomorrow at around noon...

"Age by age have men stood up and said to the world, 'From what has come before me, I was forged, but I am new and greater than my forebears.' And so each man walks the world in ruin, abandoned and untried. Less than the whole of his being"
Gydyon
Yes, I am a lawyer. No you can't sue them for that. Shut up, or I'll have your legs broken.
posted 05-23-2002 11:22:33 PM
No matter what they say, the best reaction is to smile, nod, and agree.
Gydyon
Evercrest Lawyer

Thinking about your posts
(and billing you for it) since 2001

`Doc
Cold in an Alley
posted 05-23-2002 11:24:38 PM
Go bearing gifts. Find out from Piper what their tastes are (i.e. decorative, practical, etc.), and pick out something that indicates you have enough of an income to support their daughter, but at the same time do not waste excessive amounts of money on frivolous things.
Base eight is just like base ten, really... if you're missing two fingers. - Tom Lehrer
There are people in this world who do not love their fellow human beings, and I hate people like that! - Tom Lehrer
I want to be a race car passenger; just a guy who bugs the driver. "Say man, can I turn on the radio? You should slow down. Why do we gotta keep going in circles? Can I put my feet out the window? Man, you really like Tide..." - Mitch Hedberg
Please keep your arms, legs, heads, tails, tentacles, pseudopods, wings, and/or other limb-like structures inside the ride at all times.
Please submit all questions, inquests, and/or inquiries, in triplicate, to the Department of Redundancy Department, Division for the Management of Division Management Divisions.

MadCat
Pancake
posted 05-23-2002 11:25:22 PM
Don't wave the ban stick.
"Too often, we lose sight of life's simple pleasures. Remember, when someone annoys you it takes 42 muscles in your face to frown, but it only takes 4 muscles to extend your arm and bitch-slap that motherfucker upside the head."

--
madcat@ghostfield.com

Aaron (the good one)
posted 05-23-2002 11:31:18 PM
Tell the Dad that Piper is an animal in the sack
Galbadia Hotel - Video Game Music
I am Canadian and I hate The Tragically Hip
Cap'n Elethi
I'm too sexy for my shirt, too sexy for my shirt...
posted 05-23-2002 11:32:18 PM
quote:
MadCat attempted to be funny by writing:
Don't wave the ban stick.

^
|
|
|

Elethi Rian, A Man Of Many Talents
Naota Nandaba
Don't ask me about any goddamned bannings!
posted 05-23-2002 11:33:04 PM
quote:
Ford Prefect Model 2000 was programmed to say:
but at the same time do not waste excessive amounts of money on frivolous things.

quote:
These forums are up and have continued to stay up because I, Tim Fries, have decided to pay for the bandwidth, server bills, and equipment costs out of my own pocket. I lose money from my paycheck every month by hosting these forums.

...What?

Nothing amazing happens here.
Only the ordinary.
Vorago
A completely different kind of Buckethead
posted 05-23-2002 11:33:35 PM
Aaron (the good one)
posted 05-23-2002 11:33:40 PM
In fact, don't wave any sort of stick what so ever.
Galbadia Hotel - Video Game Music
I am Canadian and I hate The Tragically Hip
Drysart
Pancake
posted 05-23-2002 11:34:46 PM
omg I hope her dad doesn't read these boards....
Piper
Rabid Druid
posted 05-23-2002 11:35:22 PM
quote:
Ford Prefect was listening to Cher while typing:
Go bearing gifts. Find out from Piper what their tastes are (i.e. decorative, practical, etc.), and pick out something that indicates you have enough of an income to support their daughter, but at the same time do not waste excessive amounts of money on frivolous things.


Oh yeah, that will go over well. "Look sir, I bought you some ram to show you I can support your daughter, that you brought up to be a strong minded, aggressive, self sufficient and assertive woman."

Even insinuating that I need "supporting" would be a show stopper =)


PIPERPOWER
What?! I was talking about the fish you crazy bastard!
Aure entuluva! ...or at least I hope.
Steven Steve
posted 05-23-2002 11:35:41 PM
Her father is... Me.
"Absolutely NOTHING [will stop me from buying Diablo III]. I will buy it regardless of what they do."
- Grawbad, Battle.net forums

"Don't want to sound like a fanboy, but I am with you. I'll buy it for sure, it's just a matter of for how long I will be playing it..."
- Silvast, Battle.net forums

Black
The Outlaw Torn
posted 05-23-2002 11:36:25 PM
Ooohh, if he does....

DRYSART IS USING YOUR DAUGHTER FOR PERSONAL PLEASURE*.

*Please don't hurt me.



Time was never on my side.
So on I wait my whole lifetime.

Ja'Deth Issar Ka'bael
I posted in a title changing thread.
posted 05-23-2002 11:36:39 PM
1. Do NOT introduce yourself as Legolas. Not even if they've seen LotR

2. No mentioning blue butts. Especially in relation to Piper's dad. "You'd look great with a navy behind, sir" is no way to start a conversation.

3. No threatening them with the ban stick. It's Texas. They'll probably get a horse to sit on you or something.

4. No wandering around in your robe warning people of your wizard staff. For some reason that really weirds people out.

5. Beware of regional delicacies. People everywhere get their kicks by getting people from other places to eat "regional delicacies". In your case, the game will be called "Let's see what we can get the Yankee to eat"

6. Do not reference how familiar you are with Dukes of Hazzard, George W. Bush's history, or anything to do with Hank Hill. Talking like Boomhower isn't a good idea either.

7. Iced Tea: Learn to love it.


uhhhmmmm...guess that's it.

Lyinar's sweetie and don't you forget it!*
"All those moments will be lost in time, like tears in rain. Time to die. -Roy Batty
*Also Lyinar's attack panda

sigpic courtesy of This Guy, original modified by me

Palador ChibiDragon
Dismembered
posted 05-23-2002 11:37:16 PM
quote:
Drysart had this to say about pies:
Any last minute tips before we leave tomorrow morning?

If the Imperial March starts playing with either parent enters the room, it's allready too late to run.

If you take something to add to the dinner (if you have dinner at their house), don't take pie or flan. If you take pie, Piper will be trying not to laugh every time it's mentioned (Piper's mom: "Would you like some pie, Tim?"). Only those infused with supernatural evil bring flan to something like this, so you have to avoid it too.

Double check to make sure you have no jewelery or items that might offend them religiously. If you have a crucifix with a (_|_) on it, LEAVE IT AT HOME! If you must wear something, a small, plain cross will be ok.

Clothes. Wear them.

Take some antiacids/anti-gas tablets just before you go in. Even if the food's good, they will help you avoid problems caused by the stress.

If they pull out the baby pics, Piper will try to derail them. Follow her lead. Unless it involves chainsaws and more than a dozen pigs.

Have something bland but filling to eat after you leave. Odds are, you won't be all that hungry while you're there, but you will want something calming on your stomach after.

Don't forget to cast a reflection in any mirrors they may have. Don't let your flesh burn when you pick up the silverware either. Parents look for these things, and they don't like them.

That's all for now, hope it helps.

I believe in the existance of magic, not because I have seen proof of its existance, but because I refuse to live in a world where it does not exist.
Naota Nandaba
Don't ask me about any goddamned bannings!
posted 05-23-2002 11:37:25 PM
quote:
Drysart probably says this to all the girls:
omg I hope her dad doesn't read these boards....

IPtracing2win

Nothing amazing happens here.
Only the ordinary.
Faeth Es'Braewyn
No Breasts. :(
posted 05-23-2002 11:38:39 PM
Don't ACT like a yank.. We can smell that a hundred miles away.. It's like tempting sharks.

And don't try to be stubborn on a subject. Thats just asking for trouble. Texans are stubborn enough to be dead for a few years before we decide for ourselves it's a good idea to lay in the grave. Dead Horses are being kicked as we speak. Learn this and accept it. You will be much happier in the long run.

If you don't see a shotgun sitting somewhere in the open, be afraid. If it's not in the open it's hidden, and if it's hidden your in trouble because you don't know where the shot's going to come from.

Don't eat the chilli, or anything else thats unfamiliar. They will just lie to you and tell you it's chicken. A favorite past time is watching you eat happily just to see your reaction when they tell you what you just ate. Even more fun is how they wait around for you to wake up after passing out.

Have fun.

"Born of fire, forged with steel, I am the hunter that you know, but will never see..."
Piper
Rabid Druid
posted 05-23-2002 11:39:27 PM
quote:
Ja'Deth Issar Ka'bael had this to say about John Romero:

6. Do not reference how familiar you are with George W. Bush's history.

I think its a good idea to stay away from politics entirely. Drysart's heathen pansy bleeding heart liberal tendency would disgrace the family bloodline.

I have a picture of Tim wearing a "Rush Limbaugh for President" Tshirt when he was younger.


PIPERPOWER
What?! I was talking about the fish you crazy bastard!
Aure entuluva! ...or at least I hope.
Aaron (the good one)
posted 05-23-2002 11:39:50 PM
I KNOW!

Come in wearing jeans, a belt with a HUGE ASS belt buckle, a GIANT cowboy hat, a peice of grain in your mouth, a brewski in your hand, and a package of steak for the gift

Galbadia Hotel - Video Game Music
I am Canadian and I hate The Tragically Hip
Random Insanity Generator
Condom Ninja El Supremo
posted 05-23-2002 11:40:11 PM
What's bad is.....

Fae isn't lying.... We're some evil bastards at times down here...

* NullDevice kicks the server. "Floggings will continue until processing power improves!"
-----------------------------------
"That was black magic, and it was easy to use. Easy and fun. Like Legos." -- Harry Dresden
-----------------------------------
That's what playing Ragnarok Online taught me: There's no problem in the universe that can't be resolved by the proper application of daggers to faces.
Bloodsage
Heart Attack
posted 05-23-2002 11:40:39 PM
Be sure you make a big deal about being from California, and how much better California is to Texas.

Also casually mention that Alaska is much, much bigger than Texas.

Have a great time!

To reign is worth ambition, though in Hell:
Better to reign in Hell than serve in Heaven.

--Satan, quoted by John Milton

Piper
Rabid Druid
posted 05-23-2002 11:41:34 PM
quote:
From the book of Palador ChibiDragon, chapter 3, verse 16:
Don't forget to cast a reflection in any mirrors they may have. Don't let your flesh burn when you pick up the silverware either. Parents look for these things, and they don't like them.

LMAO!!! Palador has the funny.


PIPERPOWER
What?! I was talking about the fish you crazy bastard!
Aure entuluva! ...or at least I hope.
Densetsu
NOT DRYSART
posted 05-23-2002 11:42:01 PM
quote:
And I was all like 'Oh yeah?' and Random Insanity Generator was all like:
Yeah, let me know when you're passing through Dallas so I can make sure to take a few shots at you myself....

YAES! Come on...you know you wanna. Let's go to DENNY'S
I was in the Virgin Islands once. I met a girl, we ate lobster, drank piña coladas. At sunset, we made love like sea otters. That was a pretty good day. Why couldn't I get that day over, and over?
Drysart
Pancake
posted 05-23-2002 11:42:35 PM
Speaking of the California/Texas relationship, when Savant was driving to North Carolina, he got pulled over by an overzealous state trooper in Texas who gave him a hard time just because of his California plates.
Piper
Rabid Druid
posted 05-23-2002 11:43:28 PM
quote:
Densetsu had this to say about Punky Brewster:
[QUOTE]And I was all like 'Oh yeah?' and Random Insanity Generator was all like:
[qb]Yeah, let me know when you're passing through Dallas so I can make sure to take a few shots at you myself....


YAES! Come on...you know you wanna. Let's go to DENNY'S [/QB][/QUOTE]

How many ec'rs are in the DFW metroplex?


PIPERPOWER
What?! I was talking about the fish you crazy bastard!
Aure entuluva! ...or at least I hope.
Delphi Aegis
Pancake
posted 05-23-2002 11:44:01 PM
quote:
We were all impressed when Bloodsage wrote:
Also casually mention that Alaska is much, much bigger than Texas.

Have a great time!


Isnt Alaska almost as big as the continental united states? (Not actual land acreage, like, in terms of how far it stretches back and forth and stuffs)

Cos those bloody map projections at school (You know, the ones with all the lines of latitude and longitude exactly the same space apart?) suck.

Delphi
I walk in the Light
Facing the Darkness Boldly
I fear no Evil
Densetsu
NOT DRYSART
posted 05-23-2002 11:45:07 PM
quote:
Piper impressed everyone with:
How many ec'rs are in the DFW metroplex?

Me, RIG, and Fae.

I was in the Virgin Islands once. I met a girl, we ate lobster, drank piña coladas. At sunset, we made love like sea otters. That was a pretty good day. Why couldn't I get that day over, and over?
Bloodsage
Heart Attack
posted 05-23-2002 11:46:06 PM
quote:
Everyone wondered WTF when Drysart wrote:
Speaking of the California/Texas relationship, when Savant was driving to North Carolina, he got pulled over by an overzealous state trooper in Texas who gave him a hard time just because of his California plates.

Something similar happened to me in Omaha--dude saw my Lexus and vanity plates, and waited for freakin' backup before giving me my ticket.

To reign is worth ambition, though in Hell:
Better to reign in Hell than serve in Heaven.

--Satan, quoted by John Milton

Azrael Heavenblade
Damn Dirty Godmoder
posted 05-23-2002 11:46:17 PM
quote:
Piper had this to say about Knight Rider:
I think its a good idea to stay away from politics entirely. Drysart's heathen pansy bleeding heart liberal tendency would disgrace the family bloodline.

I have a picture of Tim wearing a "Rush Limbaugh for President" Tshirt when he was younger.


But...isn't Limbaugh diehard conservative?

"The basic tool for manipulation of reality is the manipulation of words. If you can control the meaning of words, you can control the people who must use them." - Philip K. Dick
Drysart
Pancake
posted 05-23-2002 11:46:58 PM
quote:
Azrael/Cthon had this to say about Tron:
But...isn't Limbaugh diehard conservative?

He's an arrogant, egotistical blowhard.

Piper
Rabid Druid
posted 05-23-2002 11:47:01 PM
quote:
Azrael/Cthon had this to say about Punky Brewster:
But...isn't Limbaugh diehard conservative?

yaes, which is why I find it so very funny.


PIPERPOWER
What?! I was talking about the fish you crazy bastard!
Aure entuluva! ...or at least I hope.
Faeth Es'Braewyn
No Breasts. :(
posted 05-23-2002 11:47:17 PM
quote:
Drysart got all f'ed up on Angel Dust and wrote:
Speaking of the California/Texas relationship, when Savant was driving to North Carolina, he got pulled over by an overzealous state trooper in Texas who gave him a hard time just because of his California plates.

We're still waiting for California to sink.

And random times you can catch many texans on lawn chairs drinking a beer and watching the west and waiting. Was a disapointing event last year. It's still there..

By the way, if I remember correctly Piper used to live just up the street from me. So if you guys are going to be in that area, and have any free time. I'd love to take ya out for drinks or something.

"Born of fire, forged with steel, I am the hunter that you know, but will never see..."
Azakias
Never wore the pants, thus still wields the power of unused (_|_)
posted 05-23-2002 11:47:31 PM
quote:
Densetsu stumbled drunkenly to the keyboard and typed:
Me, RIG, and Fae.

Pesco and I will be in San Antonio, like I said...

But we'll be.. erm... 'busy'.

"Age by age have men stood up and said to the world, 'From what has come before me, I was forged, but I am new and greater than my forebears.' And so each man walks the world in ruin, abandoned and untried. Less than the whole of his being"
All times are US/Eastern
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