...I see dumb people... - EverCrest Message Forums

Author

Topic: ...I see dumb people...

Pvednes

Lynched

posted 10-03-2001 08:06:00 AM

Well, there I am, hunting spectres in Oasis, (Idiot-magnet of Marr) when I get a tell:

Malcaym tells you; 'crack plz'

Sooo, I decide a little fun with idiots is in order, so... I first do a /who on him.
He's a 31 Paladin.

You tell Malcaym; 'd00d trde sow 4 crack'
Malcaym tells you; 'iam paly cant sow dood'
You tell Malcaym; 'Well, I'm a Wizard. I can't cast Clarity.'
Malcaym tells you; 'no ur no i saw u say u will crack fr sow'

Well, At this time, I set the lamer alert on red.

You tell Malcaym; 'Well, I can't argue with logic. Incidently, I notice your lack of proficiency with d00dsp33k.'
Malcaym tells you; '?'
You tell Malcaym; '!'
Malcaym tells you; '??'
You tell Malcaym; 'I know what will come next, and so do you, if I answer that. Anyway...'
Malcaym tells you; '??'
You tell Malcaym; 'Well, d00dsp33k. to start with, you replace key letters with numbers.'
Malcaym tells you; 'what'

Note, no question mark. He appears to have lost it. Pulled it off, prehaps?

You tell Malcaym; 'For example: 'y0u 4r3 4 l4m3r'.'
Malcaym tells you; '?'

Oh, no, he didn't pull it off.

You tell Malcaym; 'Next part, for letters that there are no numbers corrosponding, use other buttons you find.'
Malcaym tells you; 'dood wtf'
You tell Malcaym; 'Getting closer, well done. Heres another example: |=|_|ck 0ff d00|)'

Luckily for my enjoyment purposes, he doesn't get the hint.

You tell Malcaym; 'The well placed use of d00dsp33k can be intensely annoying, and in some cases can, in time, lead to the existence of bitter, bitter people.'
Malcaym tells you; 'wtf shut up'
You tell Malcaym; 'As you can see, off to your left is a game named Ultima Online.'
Malcaym tells you; 'uo sucks'

Bing-ooo, can anyone say "Typical?"

You tell Malcaym; 'Ultima Online started off as a promising game.'
Malcaym tells you '?'
You tell Malcaym; 'But then, shock, people started using d00dsp33k. And then the grievers came! We are talking major bugger.'
Malcaym tells you 'what?'

Wow, that made sense! Give it an award for evolution!

Malcaym tells you; 'STFU! crack now plz!'

Ooh, I'm gonna haveta hurt him now...

You tell Malcaym; 'Eh? Oh yeah. I'm at the gypsies.'
Malcaym tells you; 'omw'

He's here. Now comes the really enjoyable bit.

You tell Malcaym; 'Oh yes, Clarity requires you be in the same group as me.'
Malcaym tells you; 'i didt no that'
You invite Malcaym to join your group.
You have formed the group.

Oh, Sweet!

Let the mayhem begin...

You tell the group; 'Clarity inc'
You begin to cast Nullify Magic
Malcaym looks a bit dispelled
Malcaym tells the group; 'THT WAS 60 DRUD SOW!!!'
You say out of character; '...I see dumb people...'
You tell the group; 'Sorry, wrong button, won't happen again.'
You tell the group; 'Clarity inc'
You begin to cast Translocate: Combine
You say out of character; '...They're everywhere...'

At this point, you'd expect him to twig that I was a wizard and was NOT going to clarity him, buuuuutt.....

Malcaym fades away.

BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!

You say out of character; '...They walk around like you and I...'
You disband your party
Malcaym tells you; 'tat not crack dood!!!'
You tell Malcaym; 'Well, duh!'
You say out of character; '...Some of them don't even know they're dumb...'
You say out of character; 'And... Some of them...'
You say out of character; 'They play EQ!'

Well, you'd think by this point Malcaym would have learned his lesson, but, five minutes later...

Malcaym tells you; 'i died u port to dl for cr?'

No folks, I am not making this up, despite Riffler's belief. (A cool british bard in Allied Fools)

You tell Malcaym; 'Certainly. Meet me at the docks.'

I am laughing soo hard right now, and I tell my guildmates 'bout it. (See Riffler)

Anyway, a few minutes later, the dickhead shows up at the docks.

Riffler is in an alt, but to avoid confusion, I changed the name of his alt back to Riff.

Riffler tells the guild; 'Naked Pally in Nektulos?'
Riffler tells the guild; 'Naked Pally in Iceclad?'
Riffler tells the guild; 'Naked Pally in Cazic?'
Riffler tells the guild; 'Nah, Naked Pally in port/death loop. After all, he did ASK to go to DL the second time.'

Ah, Riff. Always with good advice.

You tell Malcaym; So, here you are.
You invite Malcaym to join your group.
You have formed the group.

As I'm a vindictive bastard, I took the SoW that he used to get from Freeport back to Oasis off him. Again.

You tell the group; 'You're just a sucker for punishment, aren't you?'
You begin to cast Translocate: Combine.
Malcaym fades away.

You can tell what happened five minutes later, can't ye, all? He showed up again, asking for a port back. As Dreadlands was getting boring, I sent him to Toxxulia Forest then, and everyone had a good laugh. Except for Malcaym, the antipowergamer.
I did tell the guild later, that he didn't really NEED any crack, unless he just smoked it all.

[edit: what the??]

[ 10-03-2001: Message edited by: Pvednes Phoenixfeather ]