Discuss.
Flame-bringers will be dipped in sulphuric acid.
--Satan, quoted by John Milton
quote:
Check out the big brain on Bloodsage!
Yes, please.
If you do it because you fear a horrible punishment will be wrought down upon you and your family by the Almighty Himself, then you're abstaining for the wrong reasons.
Under capitalism, man exploits man. Under communism, it's just the opposite. - John Kenneth Galbraith
I don't think I could make love to someone who didn't love me, and I didn't love.
Marriage is not a required part of the equation. I'll wait for marriage if I have to; I'd darn well better get some on my wedding night, though. 
As long as
a) everyone involved is of legal age
b) everyone involved has consented
c) everyone involved is uncommitted (or both partners are participating)
d) everyone involved practices safe sex
who cares?
That's the funny thing about guys: they want to date sluts and marry virgins. One wonders where the transition occurs. /boggle
{edit: out, out damned typo!} [ 10-29-2001: Message edited by: Bloodsage ]
--Satan, quoted by John Milton
I was 20 when I changed my mind about waiting till marriage. I was almost 22 when I first had sex.
Now, I've had sex, I've been married, I have kids, I'm getting divorced. I'm waiting until I get married again, if I ever do, to have sex.
When you are having sex, the physical attraction overrides much of the emotional, and you think you feel more than you really do. And once you start having sex, it is very hard to find a reason to stop.
Find someone you care for, fall truly in love with them without the physical animal desires overloading your brain, and then, when you are ready to spend the rest of your life with them, share the intimacy and fun of lovemaking with them.
But that's just my opinion.
Religiously, this made a lot of sense to me also : http://www.bible.com/answers/afornica.html
And some scary information here : So many problems in marriages today stem from the fact that young people are not virgins when they marry. They are bringing wounded emotions and diseased bodies into their marriages because of prior promiscuous affairs. STDs (Sexually Transmitted Diseases) are so widespread that the statistics are shocking. There are 12 million new cases of STDs annually in the United states and 67% of these occur among persons under the age of 25. In fact, every year one out of six teens contracts an STD. 100,000 to 150,000 women become infertile each year as a result of STDs. Others endure years of pain as some of these diseases are incurable. What a tragic price to pay for sexual sins. [ 10-29-2001: Message edited by: Kanid ]
Is it a religious ceremony? Is it a matter of certificates and red tape?
Or is it a spiritual matter? A time where you know in your heart of hearts that you have found someone you would never leave, never hurt, always be with?
Sex before the first definition? I see no reason why not to.
Sex before the second definition? I see no reason why you'd want to.
quote:
Maradon? had this to say about spermicidal lubricant:Sex before the second definition? I see no reason why you'd want to.
I think Mortious means with someone else.
Why does sex have to have an emotional component? Granted, it's better when there is one, but it damn-sure doesn't suck (so to speak) when there isn't. 
--Satan, quoted by John Milton
quote:
Maradön? had this to say about Reading Rainbow:
Sex before the second definition? I see no reason why you'd want to.
People get tired of jerking off.
I'm a Christian, but not a bible-basher. I'm the kind people don't mind 
quote:
Bloodsage had this to say about Robocop:
Why does sex have to have an emotional component? Granted, it's better when there is one, but it damn-sure doesn't suck (so to speak) when there isn't.
For some, myself included, sex is more than just the physical act of putting your parts together and moving until one or both of you orgasms.
It is a special thing, an intimate thing, shared between two people who care deeply enough for one another that they share this with each other, and no one else, for the rest of their lives.
quote:
Kanid wrote, obviously thinking to hard:
For some, myself included, sex is more than just the physical act of putting your parts together and moving until one or both of you orgasms.It is a special thing, an intimate thing, shared between two people who care deeply enough for one another that they share this with each other, and no one else, for the rest of their lives.
Of course--and there's nothing wrong with that. But it's an arbitrary decision. It might as well be eating ice cream: sure, it's fun alone, but so much more so with someone you love.
That's why I'm asking.
What makes sex different, other than a slew of cultural/religious taboos that served a valid social purpose in the days before reliable birth control in paternal societies, but are largely irrelevant (logically speaking) now?
--Satan, quoted by John Milton
Sex before marriage.
I'm pretty much with Bloodsage.
quote:
Sex without love is only bad when one participant assumes it means more than the other.
As long asa) everyone involved is of legal age
b) everyone involved has consented
c) everyone involved is uncommitted (or both partners are participating)
d) everyone involved practices safe sex
And that's IMO (and Bloodsages), not trying to make it anyone elses opnion.
I see no problem with it.
--Satan, quoted by John Milton
quote:
Bloodsage had this to say about dark elf butts:
Why does sex have to have an emotional component? Granted, it's better when there is one, but it damn-sure doesn't suck (so to speak) when there isn't.
Dunno, for me it does. Probably has something to do with the fact that I'm quite shy IRL. As long as you protect yourself from diseases/pregnancies and you have fun it's fine. There are different types of sex, 'casual' sex that has the sole purpose of having 'fun', and the type kanid described. There's nothing wrong with either of them, things tend do get messy if people mistake one for the other though.
quote:
Modrakien had this to say about Tron:
things tend do get messy
Uh huh...
Causal/one stands/rebound sex...not as good as in love with your partner sex IMO. Sex with your partner can be very beautiful...or...primal, depending on the mood The others can relieve stress or create more. As I started to realize that I was opening my eyes to how things were declining in the realtionship I was in, the sex became bland to the point she accused ME of cheating on her because I was not interested. But having that one night stand and being the freak you always wanted to be can be fun also. Of course ALWAYS use a condom...well that is if a guy is involve in the picture at any point. I guess lesbian/bi women just have to becareful if they are with a strange woman.
Also if you just have to have an affair...make sure you understand that they will find out. Guys/Gals that think they can get away with it are in for a shocker...the look on my ex's face when she decided to come "clean" about her little funtime she had been having with a coworker and I placed the time within a couple days of the start and end was priceless. Of course a little folding money loosened the other coworkers and her neighbors lips. Gotta love greed.
[ 10-29-2001: Message edited by: Caanis Lupus ]
Edit: ack...don't ban me Points to the little msg icon.
However, like Kanid and Kekvit and a number of other poster, I do feel that FOR ME, sex is only ... "right" when I'm in love with the person and they're in love with me. Of the very few men I've had sex with, I knew I loved them and all but two of them I thought, "Hey, I could easily see myself spending the rest of my life with this person."
Things didn't turn out that way, but I don't regret having slept with any of them.
Now, if someone else doesn't feel that sex should occur only in a relationship where the two people are in love, that's fine, as long as both parties understand that's where the relationship stands. Would I be disappointed if my some-day-to-be kids did this? Yeah, kinda. Would I belittle and berate them for it? Nope, not on your life. Because I feel this is a decision that needs to be made by each individual. /shrug [ 10-29-2001: Message edited by: Katjya ]
Katjya Sylvertongue
Tarissa Treerunner The law of nature: Control is to those that are the Strongest, Fastest, and Reproduce the most effiecently.Anyway.... It is really just a challenge to yourself. A test of your will power I guess. I say dont fight it, just use good judgement. Dont go out and have wild sex with everyone, dats bad.. gets you in trouble. Wait for someone you truly want to be with, then by all means go for it. Sex isnt the only symbol of love, but spending the rest of your life with someone is.
Sex can mean alot of things... And shouldnt be used as a bonding point of marriage. Just make sure you and your partner are comfortable with it. And if you have choosen a husband/wife then dont do anything that will hurt them.
Granted I can understand the position of Kanid. I respect him for that, his choice.
I'm all for sex, so long as the two parties are willing, go for it. ¬.¬ and yes if you were wondering I'm no virgin myself.
*Runs off to play FA now*
For those of you who have decided on no sex before marriage, power and luck to you.
For those who stated love > marriage, I'm with you. Marriage is a contract. It's about making a promise to stick with one person for the rest of your life... and there are too many instances where people don't get that. I'd rather someone stuck with me because they truely care about me, rather than because they said they would and are honorable... .
On sex with vs. sex without love... no contest. I've done both... I've tried the without both knowing it and lying to myself about it. (Of course I love him, just because he makes me miserable all the time doesn't mean I don't love him...) Sex without love is a waste of time... at least masturbation guarantees an orgasm.
Or, bad sex is worse than no sex. 
Do I have issues from past sexual relationships? Yes, but I have worse ones from past non-sexual relationships. Am I aware how lucky I've been never to have caught something (or someone)... yes, but part of that was being intelligent about my partners, regular medical screening and using protection. (Repeat with me: No sex until you get the lab results.)
Marriage is sacred... it's also a physical contract dealing with property rights and how they pass to children. It and love are really what you make of them.
On sex and religion: I refuse to use someone else's ancient logic. Give me a good reason using today's medical science and I'll listen.
quote:
Kel impressed everyone with:
On sex and religion: I refuse to use someone else's ancient logic. Give me a good reason using today's medical science and I'll listen.
Yes yes, that is what I was trying so hard to think of a nice way of saying.
*agrees with Kel*
Personally, the first time I was involved with someone I was in love. It was someone I wanted to share my life with and I believed that was enough to justify it. I still believe this.
The second person I was involved with.... well... You'd think after 2 years you'd have gotten over being ripped apart. I was wrong. Plus it doesn't help that said individual couldn't make up her mind to save her ass. 
The frustration of having a bad day at work and your SO calling you up because she know's there's a gathering for your office at a local amusement park but she can't decide when to show up at your place is just beyond words.... "What time do you want me to show up?" "I get off work at 8, I should be home about 8:15... I'll want to split ASAP." "Ok.... so I should show up....?" ARGH.
*EDIT*
And on the last one above, I should point out the resolution of that one. I still find it amusing.
Said conversation occured a week before my b-day. She called later that night to cancel after I told her to make up her mind and I'll be home between 8:15 and 8:30. I come home on my b-day to see a present wrapped on the doorstep. Inside I find a rather nice display dagger. Gold and silver handle, celtic knotwork on the blade... really nice looking blade. I'll post a shot of it sometime. Along with the DAGGER, I find Dear John note, inside the B-Day card.
I'm still amused that I got a Dear John and a Dagger for my B-Day. [ 10-29-2001: Message edited by: Random Insanity Generator ] I'm warped like that.
The bible says it's wrong. That's why pretty much, I don't. But there is another side to it, I guess.
Sex is pretty much the ultimate intimacy. Sex is where two people literally become one. It's kinda like marraige, except in a physical way.
Love is tricky. Emotions lie. Just because you feel happy dory right now doesn't mean that you should have sex. Will you feel the same love and care for that person 10 years from now? Unless you get married, no. And then, unfourtunately, even when you do get married, it doesn't work out.
Look, I doubt I can change anyone. I am well aware of all the people who believe that premarital sex is fine. Well, I have to live with it. But be sure that they really want to. People have their own reasons for doing stuff, and what they tell you may not be what they are really feeling.
The problem is that sex has lost its meaning. But that's a tangent.
But, if you do want to have premarital sex, why marry? I mean, sex is like marraige, as I said earlier, in the most basic concept. I mean, if you give yourself physically and not emotionally, why should you not commit emotionally. You just can't separate the physical and emotional level, or else we just become wild beasts.
No, I don't think it's wrong to have purely sexual flings, or to sleep with girls that you're just "trying on for size".
However, purely sexual flings where there's little or no attraction always seemed to me very bad for all parties involved. [ 10-29-2001: Message edited by: Maradön? ]
Never been to bed with an ugly person, but I've woken up with a few!
{edit: P-C} [ 10-29-2001: Message edited by: Bloodsage ]
--Satan, quoted by John Milton
quote:
Lenlalron had this to say about Pirotess:
Will you feel the same love and care for that person 10 years from now? Unless you get married, no. And then, unfourtunately, even when you do get married, it doesn't work out.
quote:
Lenlalron impressed everyone with:
The bible says it's wrong.
The bible was written and interpreted by humans as fallable you and I.
quote:
Maradön? had this to say about Reading Rainbow:
The bible was written and interpreted by humans as fallable you and I.
fallible . . . you and me . . .
Given the context, that's a riot! You couldn't have planned it any better than that.
--Satan, quoted by John Milton
quote:
Densetsu impressed everyone with:
[QUOTE]Lenlalron had this to say about Pirotess:
[qb]Will you feel the same love and care for that person 10 years from now? Unless you get married, no. And then, unfourtunately, even when you do get married, it doesn't work out.
Crap. I meant 'sometimes, it doesn't work out'.
Relationships of a loving nature without marraige generally don't last that long.
Some probably do, but that's at best rare I think.
Oh, I'm not trying to insinuate that if you have sex you have to get married. It's just a thought.
quote:
Maradön? had this to say about Optimus Prime:
The bible was written and interpreted by humans as fallable you and I.
I'm not trying to get on a Bible tangent here. The Bible does say that it is wrong, and I believe in the bible, hence, I believe it is wrong. If the Bible's wrong, and we meet up in the extra-dimensional plane or something or other we call the after life, nothing like the Bible says, you can laugh at me.
But, anyway, your beliefs, your thing.
