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Topic: In Honor of Tomorrow's Release...
Soldar
I'll take two of anything, please. To go.
posted 08-07-2002 10:52:43 PM
Even though your name is The Last Strider, it doesn't entitle you to be in a Parcelan Parody, it's because you don't have a schtick.

See, I'm not in them, and I can think of several reasons why I'm not. And it's because of many reasons, one of them being that I don't have a schtick worth writing about.

Be like me, accept it, and move along.

[ 08-07-2002: Message edited by: Soldar ]

The Last Strider
I will die alone
posted 08-07-2002 10:55:38 PM
quote:
When the babel fish was in place, it was apparent Soldar said:
Even though your name is The Last Strider, it doesn't entitle you to be in a Parcelan Parody, it's because you don't have a schtick.

See, I'm not in them, and I can think of several reasons why I'm not. And it's because of many reasons, one of them being that I don't have a schtick worth writing about.

Be like me, accept it, and move along.


I used to have a schtick, then it went away. I thought he would write about me simply to mess with me.
"We have listened to you speak since the dawn of time, and we have learned to imatoot you exarktly."-The Simpsons

Necromancer: How DARE you imply that I was involved in a rude act with my undead servant! I will flay the flesh from your bones! I will summon a thousand maggot-ridden corpses to gnaw your flesh! I will trap your soul in-
Ghoul: My ass hurts.

Soldar
I'll take two of anything, please. To go.
posted 08-07-2002 11:02:10 PM
quote:
The Last Strider had this to say about Optimus Prime:
I used to have a schtick, then it went away. I thought he would write about me simply to mess with me.

Yeah, I remember when you used to... time erases everything...

Karnaj
Road Warrior Queef
posted 08-08-2002 12:57:07 AM
Shit myself laughing. Nuff said.
That's the American Dream: to make your life into something you can sell. - Chuck Palahniuk, Haunted

Under capitalism, man exploits man. Under communism, it's just the opposite. - John Kenneth Galbraith



Beer.

King Parcelan
Chicken of the Sea
posted 08-08-2002 03:35:30 AM
Stress and tension have delayed the postage of our next addendum.

Stay tuned tomorrow for Part III: The Council of Elsart.

Trent
Smurfberry Moneyshot
posted 08-08-2002 02:50:10 PM
Um..

bump

Want to see part 3.

Vorbis
Vend-A-Goat
posted 08-08-2002 04:21:14 PM
quote:
ImNotTrent Inc. attempted to be funny by writing:
Um..

bump

Want to see part 3.


Cap'n Elethi
I'm too sexy for my shirt, too sexy for my shirt...
posted 08-08-2002 04:57:57 PM
I can't wait.

Well done, Parcington.

Elethi Rian, A Man Of Many Talents
Dr Cysa
Angsty Mcangst
posted 08-08-2002 09:26:43 PM
Ow...I fell off my chair.

Extremely humorous!

I don't discriminate...I hate everyone.
Vorbis
Vend-A-Goat
posted 08-09-2002 01:00:09 AM
Where's the rest parce! You said you'd have it up after you ate!
Soldar
I'll take two of anything, please. To go.
posted 08-09-2002 01:44:34 AM
quote:
Vorbis of Pie was listening to Cher while typing:
Where's the rest parce! You said you'd have it up after you ate!

Do not rush the works.

They are done, when they are meant to be done.

Though I want to see them too.

Vorbis
Vend-A-Goat
posted 08-09-2002 01:52:47 AM
quote:
Soldar had this to say about pies:
Do not rush the works.

They are done, when they are meant to be done.

Though I want to see them too.


Yeah, but he told me at about 6 he would do them after he ate, and then he went to eat!

King Parcelan
Chicken of the Sea
posted 08-09-2002 03:10:22 AM
Meanwhile, at the courtyards of Isengard...

The camera pans out to reveal Karnalf riding up to the steps of the tower, while a shrill, irritating voice speaks in the background.

"There are fires beyond the peaks of Mordor...and the hour grows late...and I am starting to itch...and Gandalf the Grey comes seeking my council."

Karnalf dismounts and bows his head slightly as a bearded monkey wearing oversized white robes slowly comes down the steps of Isengard.

Cadgamon: Welcome, old friend.

Scene changes to the interior of Isengard. Boy, how many times have we said 'Isengard' in this part?

Anyways, we see Karnalf and Cadgamon sitting near a table, discussing the grave matters.

Cadgamon: Mauradon has regained much of his former power...he cannot take physical form yet, but his spirit has lost none of its potency...

Karnalf: ...what do you mean?

Cadgamon: Surely you have seen it as well...a great, lidless eye...wreathed in flame and sounding like a cat in heat undergoing neutering process.

Karnalf: ...you are not who you seem.

Cadgamon: What makes you say that?

Karnalf: Because Cadgamon the White could never pronounce such a word as "process"!

Cadgamon: Your love of the halflings has addled your mind...

Karnalf: What do you mean by that? Did you see those videos circling around the net? Listen, it's very easy to photoshop my face on a nude body, and-

Cadgamon: No, fool! I meant, we must side with the eye...we must side with Mauradon. The hour has grown later than you expected...

Karnalf looks at a nearby clock.

Karnalf: Fuck! I'm late for my pottery class! Sorry, but I've got to go warn the Hobbits of your evil plan and, y'know, NOT be around when you try to destroy the world.

Karnalf begins heading for the exits, only to find them sealing themselves shut!

Cadgamon: Fool. You cannot leave yet. Not without the customary Wizard-Fight Scene!

Karnalf: Again? I told you we shouldn't have made such a stupid rule in this order! It doesn't make sense that we should have to do a fight scene every time we leave a room!

Cadgamon: You're just bitter 'cause Radigast kicks your ass everytime! Now FIGHT!

Cadgamon kicks Karnalf in the groin with his little monkey feet!

Karnalf: OW! You little twat! Get back here!

Karnalf begins chasing Cadgamon around the room, bashing him over the head with his staff!

Cadgamon: OW! OW! I'M SORRY, DADDY! I DIDN'T MEAN TO LOOK AT YOUR GIRLY MAGAZINES! I'M SORRY!

Karnalf: ...Mauradon has corrupted you more than I imagined.

Cadgamon: Ha! Fool! You fell for my distraction!

Cadgamon flings a large glob of poop in Karnalf's eyes!

Karnalf: WHAT THE-?! Did you just throw poop at me?!

Cadgamon wastes no time and kicks Karnalf in the shin, then rubs his red monkey butt all over his beard!

Karnalf: ...I'm...just gonna...pass out now...if that's okay.

Karnalf collapses on the ground. Cadgamon snickers, then looks to the door as two orcs enter.

Vise the Orc: What does Mauradon will, m'lord? What does the Eye command?

Cadgamon: ...we have work to do...

There is a long pause...

Cadgamon: Fuck. These scene changes always take too long. Haul this fool down to the dungeon.

Fennar the Orc: But, m'lord, it's all filled up with the corn chips you ordered.

Cadgamon: Fuck again! Fine, fine...just put him up ontop of the tower. AND MAKE SURE HE DOESN'T FIND ANY GODDAMN MOTHS TO TALK TO!

Meanwhile, at the ancient fortress of Weathertop...

We find our heroes: Vorbo, Chalwise, Keggy, Blindin and the mysterious Stridejah atop the mountain.

Vorbo: Well, it's fortunate that we escaped the clutches of those creatures...what were they?

Stridejah: They once were sane. The Fazgul. Dingus-Wraiths. Corrupted by the powers of television and boyish fantasy. Neither boys...nor men.

Vorbo: Well, thank goodness we escaped from them! Thanks to your technique of stripping us naked and making us slither out of Bree in the muddy streets!

Stridejah: ...yes...that was fortunate. Anyways, these are for you.

Stridejah tosses down a few blades in front of them, each one topped with a cork.

Vorbo: It's a little condescending to give us swords with the safety still on, isn't it?

Blindin: OW!

Camera pans onto Blindin to find that he is sticking himself in the eye with a cork.

Vorbo: ...

Stridejah: Right. I shall have a look around.

Later that night, Vorbo awakens to the sound of fire and merriment. He turns around to see his fellow Hobbits cooking over an open fire.

Vorbo: What are you fools doing?!

Keggy: Tomatoes, sausages, and nice crispy bacon!

Vorbo: PUT IT OUT! PUT IT OUT!

Vorbo quickly stamps out the fire.

Blindin: Well, that was a little rude.

Vorbo: Be thankful we didn't attract the attention of the Fazgul.

Somewhere off in the distance, a fearsome shriek is heard! The Hobbits look down to see Five of the Dingus-Wraiths approaching the fortress.

Vorbo: But I put out the fire!

Chalwise: Ah yes, but you didn't turn off the strobe light we were fooling around with!

Vorbo: ...is this why Frodo left the Fellowship? Nevermind, let's run!

The Hobbits hurry up to the top of the fortress, where they are soon surrounded by the Fazgul! The Dingus-Wraiths slowly close in upon Vorbo, pushing back the other Hobbits.

Screaming in ecstasy terror, Vorbo slips on the ring and finds himself in a spirit world. Standing before him are no longer black riders, but obnoxious-looking, shaven-headed children!

Vorbo: Well, if I had known you all looked this dorky under your cloaks, I wouldn't have ran so fast!

Fazgul #1: Huh?

Fazgul #5: Dude, he's ragging on your cloak.

Fazgul #1: YOU FUCKER!

The Fazgul leans in and stabs Vorbo squarely in the side with his dagger!

The Hobbit squeals in pain as a shadowy shape appears before his vision and begins slashing at the critters with his sword and a torch! He manages to slip off the ring to see Stridejah before him!

In a fearsome, yet oddly undescribable battle, Stridejah sets the Dingus-Wraiths on fire and they flee, screeching in terror!

Fazgul #4: QUICK! GET THE SENSU BEANS!

The other Hobbits and Stridejah gather 'round Vorbo to look at him strangely.

Stridejah picks up the knife he was stabbed with and scowls as it crumbles to dust.

Stridejah: He's been stabbed with a Moronian blade. The wound is deep...if we don't get him help soon, he'll become like them.

Blindin: You mean...

Stridejah: Yes...he'll speak in italics.

Later, in the forests below Weathertop, we find the Hobbits gathered around Vorbo in concern.

Out of the darkness comes Stridejah with an elven woman wearing bunny ears.

Keggy: Who is she?

Blindin: I don't know. If only we had had some cinematogoraphy explaining such a thing!

Chalwise: She's a psychopath elf!

Stridejah quickly picks up Vorbo and takes him over to the elf woman's horse. They begin conversing in elvish between themselves.

Stridejah: *Stay with the Hobbits. I'll send horses for you.*

Arwechii: *No! I'll go!*

Stridejah: *I'm the faster rider...*

Arwechii: *If you think I'm going to stay behind with these little freaks...*

Stridejah smiles and holds her hand.

Arwechii: I do not fear.......the Fazgul. I'm terrified of little men.

Stridejah: Ride hard, don't look back.

There is a snicker from Arwechii.

Stridejah: What?

Arwechii: You know, in the book, my role was played by a man.

Stridejah: So?

Arwechii: So, if this were the book, you'd be holding hands with a man! Hee hee hee...

Stridejah: Ride harder...NEVER look back.

The camera pans out to find Arwechii holding Vorbo atop her horse and riding quickly away from the Fazgul, who are in hot pursuit!

One of the Dingus-Wraiths reaches over to grab the Hobbit. He begins to slip away.

Arwechii: No, Vorbo! You must hold on! The idea of a Hobbit-sized Wraith is just...too silly to bear!

The flight continues down to the river, where Arwechii gallops across and stands at the other side. The Fazgul wait at the shore...

Fazgul #4: Give up the Halfling, She-Elf!

Arwechii: Bite me!

Fazgul #6: Dude, she's totally into you. Call her a She-Elf again.

Arwechii: If you want him, come and claim him!

The Fazgul raise their swords and begin to advance across the river with zeal.

Arwechii: Hmm...that was probably the wrong thing to say.

Suddenly, the river begins to rise and a torrent of water rushes from the nearby canyon, threatening to engulf the riders! Seen within it are vaguely round shapes...

Fazgul #6: Look! In the water!

Fazgul #2: Dude! Are those...asses?

Fazgul #9: Flee! Make our deaths look great!

The Fazgul begin to gallop away as the torrent engulfs them, washing them away in the river.

Arwechii's sigh of relief is short-lived as she notices Vorbo breathing heavily. She sets him down on the ground and leans over him.

Arwechii: Hold on, Vorbo! You musn't give up! YOU MUST NO-...what are you staring at?

Vorbo: Hee hee hee...I can see down your shirt from here.

There is a loud crack, followed by an unpleasant squealing sound as the camera fades out.

TO BE CONTINUED...

[ 08-09-2002: Message edited by: King Parcelan ]

Cap'n Elethi
I'm too sexy for my shirt, too sexy for my shirt...
posted 08-09-2002 03:15:50 AM
HAHAHAHAHAHAH

Marvelous!

Elethi Rian, A Man Of Many Talents
Black
The Outlaw Torn
posted 08-09-2002 03:21:19 AM
Hahahaha!

Excelent!



Time was never on my side.
So on I wait my whole lifetime.

Trent
Smurfberry Moneyshot
posted 08-09-2002 03:27:24 AM
Again, the saga continues, and it is good.

<insert dancing bear here>

Good job.

Vorbis
Vend-A-Goat
posted 08-09-2002 03:49:46 AM
Shit, that hurt. I think my ass broke while laughing.
Bajah
Thooooooor
posted 08-09-2002 04:18:06 AM
I am so loving this story

hahahhah, very very good, Parce

Karnaj
Road Warrior Queef
posted 08-09-2002 09:49:11 AM
Once again, Cadga befouls my person. At least now I know how Vorbis' refrigerator feels, now.

Top notch work, Parce. Keep it up, d00d.

That's the American Dream: to make your life into something you can sell. - Chuck Palahniuk, Haunted

Under capitalism, man exploits man. Under communism, it's just the opposite. - John Kenneth Galbraith



Beer.

Ferrel
Fippy's VP
posted 08-09-2002 10:42:07 AM
Is really good =D two thumbs and a tail up!

She kisses ass for the next 20 minutes for a part :P

Ferrel!
Vise the Stompy
Title now 100% ass free!
posted 08-09-2002 12:22:50 PM
I'm an orc!? Whats up with that?*Looks over at Sig Pic*Err Well thats a barbarian... hamster...thingy....REALLY!
Soldar
I'll take two of anything, please. To go.
posted 08-09-2002 12:25:40 PM
Worth the wait.
Vorbis
Vend-A-Goat
posted 08-09-2002 11:05:09 PM
boomp.
Palador ChibiDragon
Dismembered
posted 08-10-2002 01:08:25 AM
Funny as ever Parce!

Side note: I wonder, if you shot someone with a rail gun launched Sensu Bean, would it kill them or not?

I believe in the existance of magic, not because I have seen proof of its existance, but because I refuse to live in a world where it does not exist.
Blindy
Roll for initiative, Monkey Boy!
posted 08-10-2002 01:16:44 AM
Owww! god! my eye!@
On a plane ride, the more it shakes,
The more I have to let go.
King Parcelan
Chicken of the Sea
posted 08-10-2002 01:44:09 AM
I am too full of pizza to write Part IV tonight.

But if you give lots of praise in my absence, I promise to fit you in the special ending of the story.

Soldar
I'll take two of anything, please. To go.
posted 08-10-2002 02:11:07 AM
My ass hurts.

From the humor of the thread, or sitting on a bike seat.

The choice is yours.

Karnaj
Road Warrior Queef
posted 08-10-2002 02:16:22 AM
quote:
King Parcelan wrote, obviously thinking too hard:
I am too full of pizza to write Part IV tonight.

But if you give lots of praise in my absence, I promise to fit you in the special ending of the story.


Do I have to lavish praise on you, or can I just buy you some new socks instead?

That's the American Dream: to make your life into something you can sell. - Chuck Palahniuk, Haunted

Under capitalism, man exploits man. Under communism, it's just the opposite. - John Kenneth Galbraith



Beer.

omfg i sux0rs
Pancake
posted 08-10-2002 03:50:23 AM
Since this thread is about Lord of the Rings I would just like to take this time to say that EVERYTIME i see legolas on the movie I think.... WHOA!!! Look at drysart, he is kicken ass!

I was wondering if anyone else has the same problems.........

*hides from all the incomming flames*

just think about how much i suck in REAL LIFE!
Chalesm
There is no innuendo in this title.
posted 08-10-2002 04:08:40 AM
Great job with "Arwechii", Parcelan. Pretty much every line she has had me laughing.
In the beginning the Universe was created.
This has made a lot of people angry and been widely regarded as a bad move.

Douglas Adams, 1952-2001

Blindy
Roll for initiative, Monkey Boy!
posted 08-10-2002 01:15:20 PM
i want to see blindin kickin some ass.
On a plane ride, the more it shakes,
The more I have to let go.
Dr Cysa
Angsty Mcangst
posted 08-10-2002 01:29:44 PM
Pure genius. I will never again be able to see Strider with out mentally putting a Purple hat on him.
I don't discriminate...I hate everyone.
Azymyth
Not gay; just weird
posted 08-10-2002 07:18:14 PM
pmub
I suffer from CRS: Can't Remember Shit.

Sig pic done by the very talented SJen!

King Parcelan
Chicken of the Sea
posted 08-11-2002 01:20:47 AM
Part IV
The Council of Elsart

Camera opens up on a white background, in which we see many images. A chanting elf face...white houses...Hobbit pornography...and finally...it fades out upon Vorbo.

Vorbo: Uggh...where am I?

Karnalf: Rivendell. In the House of Elsart. And it is the 15th of October, if you must know. And your mom's still hot.

Vorbo: Karnalf!

Karnalf: Hello, Vorbo my boy.

Vorbo: Why didn't you meet us at the Prancing Pony, like you said you would? Did you have to attend another Pride Rally?

Karnalf: ...I should cane you for that, but instead I'll tell you why I was delayed. It seems the friendship of Cadgamon is not easily forgotten...

Scene opens on the roof of Orthanc, with Cadgamon seated atop Karnalf, shoving bugs in his face.

Cadgamon: EAT THE BUGS! EAT 'EM! And join with Mauradon, while you're at it!

Karnalf: Pfft! Ack! Mmm....uh...I mean, NEVER!

Cadgamon: So...you have chosen the way of pain...open wide. Here comes a big one.

Karnalf shoves Cadgamon off of him and jumps off the side of the tower.

Cadgamon: Uh oh! Angst-widden wizard gonna jump off and commit suicide so we'll aww wuv him?

Cadgamon gasps as he sees the wizard flying off on the back of a giant eagle!

Cadgamon: Orcs! To Home Depot! We must buy more Bug Zappers!

Scene changes back to the House of Elsart.

Vorbo: Uh huh...well, I bet I'd have a scene change all of my own if I knew what the hell happened after I was stabbed.

Karnalf: Well, didn't you read Part III?! Anyways, we took you here, where you were cured by the Elvish magics of Elsart.

The camera pans over to a high elf in robes, preening himself in front of a mirror.

Karnalf: Uhh....Elsart...

Elsart: Huh? Oh, yes! Welcome to Rivendell, Vorbo Baggins. And try not to track mud on your way in.

The scene shifts to a slow motion sequence in which all the Hobbits are reunited with each other. There is much hugging, rejoicing, assgrabbing and so on...

The camera pans out to Elsart's abode, where he quietly watches the Hobbits below with Karnalf.

Elsart: ...they are so gay.

Karnalf: No, they're just Hobbits. I think it's something about the feet. But there's little time to discuss that now!

Elsart: Indeed. It's time to discuss my hair.

Karnalf: ...no, it's time to discuss the return of Mauradon.

Elsart: Oh, right. Well, why don't we just give him a funny title and mock him about his hatred of Shamans?

Karnalf: That would certainly prove amusing, but it wouldn't really help. We've got to get rid of the ring.

Elsart: Indeed. And now you tell us that we can no longer recieve aid from Cadgamon.

Karnalf: Indeed. But we never really could trust him, could we?

Elsart: You're still bitter about that Christmas party, I see.

Karnalf: It's not my fault! He made up that rule about if you're standing under the mistletoe you get kicked in the nuts! You just didn't care because you were making googly eyes at Gloin all night.

Elsart: I thought he was Galadriel! I told you someone spiked the eggnog!

Karnalf: Right, right...

Elsart: Anyways, the ring cannot stay here. It must be taken to Mount Doom. And I doubt your Hobbits can do that.

Karnalf: Well, technically, they were only supposed to take it to the Prancing Pony. I was hoping someone competent would meet them and take it from there.

Elsart: And did they meet someone competent?

Karnalf: No. They fucked up and chose that "once and future king" guy.

Elsart: Doh! Well, you can't turn to the dwarves. They sit in their holes all day and wank to Elf pr0n! They care nothing for our problems!

Karnalf: And the elves?

Elsart: My people are leaving these shores, Karnalf. We will not be voyeured by dwarves any longer. So, who will you turn to?

Karnalf: ....we shall place our faith in Men.

Elsart: *sigh* Men on your mind again? I told you you were spending too much time with the Hobbits.

Karnalf: Shut the fuck up and wait for the scene transition...

There is a long wait...Elsart grins.

Elsart: ...you know...I'm not wearing anything under these robes.

Karnalf: ....shut up.

The next scene occurs in a small circle, where several elves, dwarves and humans are seated. Most notably is a goatee'd elf in a cloak, a dwarf wearing a tam, and a rather obnoxious-looking, prepubescent human.

Elsart takes a seat and looks at Karnalf and Vorbo for a brief moment.

Elsart: You have been called today-

Random person: Penis.

Elsart: ...to discuss the fate of-

Random person: Penis.

Elsart: Middle-

Random person: PENISPENISPENIS

Elsart: That's IT! GET OUT OF HERE, DELIDGAMOND!

Random person: Awww...

Elsart: Anyways, you have been summoned here to answer the threat of Mordor. The Dark Lord Mauradon has been seeking the ring.

Gydli: Aye, and where is this so-called "ring"?

Elsart: Vorbo, bring forth the ring.

Vorbo tenatively steps up and places the ring on a pedestal. There is a large "ohhhh...ahhhhh...peeenissss" before Elsart calls order once more.

The obnoxious human leans forward.

Waisztomir: It is a gift...

Sridejah: WILL YOU STOP SAYING THAT?! Even at breakfast today, you looked at the eggs and said "it is a gift". SHUT UP!

Waisztomir: And what would you know of it? You vile ranger! Don't even have the AC to withstand the flames I'm about to give you!

Faegolas: Hold your tongue! This is no mere Ranger! This is Arajah, son of Arathah, heir to Isildur, heir to Gondor.

Elsart: Lovely introduction.

Waisztomir: Well, just for that, I'm going to go into a huge schpiel about how this should be used to save my homeland...

Later...

Waisztomir: ...and monkeys for all!

Karnalf: ...are you done?

Waisztomir: I think so...by the way, it's spelled "dun". Are you stupid?

Karnalf: ...right. Anyways, let us hear from Faegolas of Mirkwood.

The camera pans over to the goatee'd elf, who is currently pinned and being pummeled senseless by Elsart.

Elsart: YOU THINK YOU CAN BE LEGOLAS?! YOU DON'T EVEN HAVE THE HAIR FOR HIM! YOU GODDAMN BITCH!

Elsart slowly looks up at the camera and grins sheepishly.

Elsart: Heh heh...anyways, please go ahead, Faegolas.

Faegolas: Very well. I shall now talk about what's been going on in Mirkwood as well as the state of my colon.

Much later...

Faegolas: ...and so, it seems as though the cream is doing its job quite well.

Elsart: Wise words, bitch. But it is time we heard from the wise Karnalf about everything in Isengard.

Karnalf: Thank you, Elsart. I shall now repeat what we've all seen and know up to this part in a long, drawn-out monologue...

The next day....

Karnalf: ...and that's why I like rice krispies.

Karnalf looks around to see the council asleep.

Elsart: Zzzzz...*snort* HUH?! Wha?! Oh, right, where were we?

Gydli: I think we were just about to have a huge argument.

Elsart: Oh, right. So, who wants to take the ring?

Gydli: I WILL BE DEAD BEFORE THE RING IS IN THE HANDS OF AN ELF!

Elsart: Okay, that's a good start. Let's argue now.

All the council members get up, start yelling at each other, waving their cocks around, and so forth before Vorbo gets up.

Vorbo: I will take the ring!

They continue yelling...

Vorbo: I WILL TAKE THE RING!

The yelling slowly dies down...

Vorbo: I WILL TAKE THE FUCKING RING, YOU GODDAMN SONS OF BI-...oh, hi. I will take the ring to Mordor....though, I do not know the way.

Karnalf leans down and smiles.

Karnalf: I will help you bear this burden...

Stridejah steps up and kneels before the Hobbit.

Stridejah: I will follow you to the darkness of Mordor and the house of transvestites. My sword is yours.

Faegolas: And my goatee.

Gydli: And my tam.

Waisztomir: If the fate of Middle-Earth is to be in the hands of a Hobbit, it is up to Gondor to save the land.

Stridejah: And another thing! When the toilet was clogged up, you claimed that THAT was up to Gondor as well.

Elsart: Quit yer flames, bitches. You're all a fellowship now! And as such, you will be known as The Big, Fruity Losers Fellowship of the Ring.

The three remaining Hobbits burst from the foliage.

Chalwise: Wait! Wait! You're not goin' anywhere without me!

Elsart: Indeed. There is little hope of seperating you from your master. Even when he is summoned to a secret council and you are not...

Elsart laughs a little, then turns deadly serious.

Elsart: You're lucky I forgot to put down the Roach Motels, bitch.

Chalwise: Mr. Karnalf said to me "You're a failure in life and in love, Chalwise Gamgee!" But after that, he said "Don't you lose him, Chalwise Gamgee!" And I don't mean to.

Keggy and Blindin: What he said!

Elsart: You mean, you were both charged with watching over Vorbo?

Blindin: Well, no...but he called us failures, too. We wanna go anyway.

Keggy: Indeed! You need people of homosexuality to go on this mission...quest...thing.

Elsart: Very well, then. You are STILL the Fellowship of the Ring...but you're not too far off from my first name for you. Tomorrow you leave.

Keggy: Right...where are we goin'?

To be continued...

OtakuPenguin
Peels like a tangerine, but is juicy like an orange.
posted 08-11-2002 01:25:22 AM
...Hil-fucking-arious
..:: This Is The Sound Of Settling ::..
G.S. Waisztarroz
Pancake
posted 08-11-2002 01:27:42 AM
Holy shit.

*Breaks something laughing.*

Soldar
I'll take two of anything, please. To go.
posted 08-11-2002 01:29:06 AM
quote:
How.... Soldar.... uughhhhhh:
Worth the wait.

My previous statement holds true.

Piper
Rabid Druid
posted 08-11-2002 01:31:58 AM
Very nice Parce.

PIPERPOWER
What?! I was talking about the fish you crazy bastard!
Aure entuluva! ...or at least I hope.
Vorbis
Vend-A-Goat
posted 08-11-2002 01:52:13 AM
Excellent, yet again!
Akiraiu Zenko
Is actually a giddy schoolgirl
posted 08-11-2002 01:52:36 AM
This just gets funnier with every single installation!!
The artist formerly known as Zephyer Kyuukaze.
All times are US/Eastern
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