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Author
Topic: Call to action - Vote for Apocoplay
diadem
eet bugz
posted 03-28-2012 08:08:37 PM
I hastily written elevator pitch for my company is now online. This means that it is open for voting form the public, which is 10% of my score for a competition with a substantial reward. Please vote for us. It makes a difference!

Vote here

edit: feel free to reply with rephrased pitches that sound better

diadem fucked around with this message on 03-28-2012 at 08:22 PM.

play da best song in da world or me eet your soul
nem-x
posted 03-28-2012 08:43:41 PM
I feel sorry for whoever forgets to uncheck the subscription to your newsletter.


Voted anyways

nem-x fucked around with this message on 03-28-2012 at 08:43 PM.

Blindy.
Suicide (Also: Gay.)
posted 03-29-2012 06:34:18 AM
Ok, so you might want to remove "Welcome - My ASP.Net MVC WebPage" title from your site.
diadem
eet bugz
posted 03-29-2012 07:30:39 AM
quote:
There was much rejoicing when Blindy. said this:
Ok, so you might want to remove "Welcome - My ASP.Net MVC WebPage" title from your site.

Good eye. I was hoping to fix that before anyone noticed. Working on that as we speak .

play da best song in da world or me eet your soul
Falaanla Marr
I AM HOT CHIX
posted 03-29-2012 10:16:18 PM
"Ten years ago we helped a friend create a successful entertainment convention that expects approximately 10,000 attendees this year. We noticed recurring problem that affected some talented attendees - individuals created complete physical games but lacked the resources to bring them to market. Apocoplay solves this problem by rapidly converting these games into the social and mobile space while using proven practices to immediately monetize the products at low cost."

Sentence 2: "We noticed a recurring problem..." -- you left out the a.

Sentence 4: The "Convert these games into the social and mobile space..." portion of the sentence sounds awkward -- it is the social and mobile space part that gets me. There has to be a better way to word that.

Random Insanity Generator
Condom Ninja El Supremo
posted 03-30-2012 12:26:46 PM
quote:
Falaanla Marr had this to say about Captain Planet:
"Ten years ago we helped a friend create a successful entertainment convention that expects approximately 10,000 attendees this year. We noticed recurring problem that affected some talented attendees - individuals created complete physical games but lacked the resources to bring them to market. Apocoplay solves this problem by rapidly converting these games into the social and mobile space while using proven practices to immediately monetize the products at low cost."

Sentence 4: The "Convert these games into the social and mobile space..." portion of the sentence sounds awkward -- it is the social and mobile space part that gets me. There has to be a better way to word that.


"Apocoplay solves this problem by rapidly creating social/mobile applications while using proven practices to efficiently monetize the products at lower costs." Sound better?

* NullDevice kicks the server. "Floggings will continue until processing power improves!"
-----------------------------------
"That was black magic, and it was easy to use. Easy and fun. Like Legos." -- Harry Dresden
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That's what playing Ragnarok Online taught me: There's no problem in the universe that can't be resolved by the proper application of daggers to faces.
Tarquinn
Personally responsible for the decline of the American Dollar
posted 03-30-2012 01:07:48 PM
quote:
Random Insanity Generator's fortune cookie read:
"Apocoplay solves this problem by rapidly creating social/mobile applications while using proven practices to efficiently monetize the products at lower costs." Sound better?

Welcome to Apocoplay. This is Apocoplay. Welcome. You can do anything at Apocoplay. Anything at all. The only limit is yourself. Welcome to Apocoplay!

~Never underestimate the power of a Dark Clown.
diadem
eet bugz
posted 04-01-2012 05:48:12 PM
A few people weren't fans of the video so I suppose I could throw something together myself for now.

Here's a rough script I just threw together....
(in progress)
part 1
part 2
Part 3
part 4

diadem fucked around with this message on 04-01-2012 at 05:53 PM.

play da best song in da world or me eet your soul
Taeldian
Pancake
posted 04-06-2012 09:32:28 PM
Just a heads-up: I didn't watch the video because I didn't feel like putting my headphones on, and I was seriously confused about what your company does.

I don't know much about the users of MassChallenge, but even if you have solid proof that the vast majority of people actually watch those videos, I would recommend retuning the elevator pitch to explain exactly what it is that you do. Never assume users will behave the way you think they will.

I expect the users on this website will have low engagement with any given piece of content, so it's vital that you capture their attention quickly.

I read through a few of last year's finalists. The opening sentences on most of them are either stating the problem they're trying to solve, or stating exactly what their company is trying to accomplish.

You're trying to solve the problem of undiscovered talent not having a chance to bring their ideas to market. You solve that problem by turning the best ideas into games.

Taeldian fucked around with this message on 04-06-2012 at 09:55 PM.

diadem
eet bugz
posted 04-07-2012 07:09:36 AM
quote:
Taeldian had this to say about pies:
Just a heads-up: I didn't watch the video because I didn't feel like putting my headphones on, and I was seriously confused about what your company does.

I don't know much about the users of MassChallenge, but even if you have solid proof that the vast majority of people actually watch those videos, I would recommend retuning the elevator pitch to explain exactly what it is that you do. Never assume users will behave the way you think they will.

I expect the users on this website will have low engagement with any given piece of content, so it's vital that you capture their attention quickly.

I read through a few of last year's finalists. The opening sentences on most of them are either stating the problem they're trying to solve, or stating exactly what their company is trying to accomplish.

You're trying to solve the problem of undiscovered talent not having a chance to bring their ideas to market. You solve that problem by turning the best ideas into games.


Thanks! This is actually the same advice that I've been getting from former MassChallenge champions. Some of them are going to help me polish a few things up Monday night .

play da best song in da world or me eet your soul
diadem
eet bugz
posted 04-11-2012 07:59:10 PM
Our MassChallenge entry is in.

No rest for the wicked, though.. MassDigi is this weekend.

play da best song in da world or me eet your soul
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